I have realized one important thing - I absorb the energy of others. That is important because now I see a lot of patterns and I know now that I have to surround myself with the kind of people that make me feel better in one way or another. I do not know what exactly those ways are, but I'm guessing that it's just genuine people with interests in common with mine and understanding and acceptance at least half as deep as mine.

I also have realized that I need to be appreciated, and if people around me do not appreciate me or especially if they even show me how much they do not appreciate me, that makes me feel bad. Whether I want that or not.

Having said that, I do indeed need to be very careful with what kind of people I surround myself with. Unfortunately I do not have that luxury right now.

Even the difference between the Eastern Europe and the Western Europe is so different in peoples' mentality. Even my haircut doesn't fit here because it isn't a simple shave or a short cut with a shaving machine. I do not want to have a haircut like that. I do not think that it fits me. In fact, I've seen another person with a haircut like that and it completely changed him in my eyes. He looked like a different person. I maybe would like to try to see how I feel with very short hair (and I think I will shave my head completely one day), however I do not believe that I will ever just have such a hairstyle because I feel like I resonate with it.

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I could never understand people who told me "well, it's not that bad, there are people who are waayyy worse", and then continue to give examples of someone who cut themselves deeper, who lost a limb, who is completely broke, who has been beat up or raped in jail or something else. All (or at least most) of the stories they would tell were true, and with one person in particular - he would actually know someone like that, or know someone who knows someone like that... But I could never understand it. How the fuck is that supposed to make me feel any better?

First, if I cared insanely about humanity, I would become sad that things like that happen. Second, the fact that someone was beaten up, robbed, kicked and raped doesn't change the fact that I - for example - broke my phone. It's not even relevant what someone else went through, we're talking about what happened to me and how it makes me feel.

What's worst (or rather best, at least for that person) is that thinking these things actually makes him (or them, it's just that this person triggered these thoughts recently) feel better. So... Let me rephrase, the following thoughts makes quite a few people on Earth to feel better about themselves and what happened to them (even if it's a small thing):

Conscious thinking process: "Oh he was raped by three men and beaten up so badly that all his bones broke, and he has absolutely no money either..."
*Takes a deep breath with relief.*
Subconsciousness: "How glad am I that there are people who are in a lot more horrible situations, now I don't have to feel so bad about dropping my phone..."

In my mind, that's fucking horrible. But hey! If it helps you feel better, keep on doing it, right?



It has always been such a good feeling for me to reinstall the operating system on my computer... I just finished customizing such without all the useless Microsoft's software, invasive and hidden tracking, and bloatware that's absolutely useless for any average Windows user. It just takes space and resources, even for someone like me - I do a lot of unusual things with my computer, many of which an average user wouldn't even know about.

I reduced my Windows installation size approximately in half, and I didn't even compress the files...

My computer is also lightning-fast compared to how it was with a fresh installation of default Windows 7, which someone else installed for me. In fact, that person installed a lot of bloatware himself, although in his opinion that's all useful and necessary "best on the planet" software, and if you refuse to use it - you are an idiot. Sure, you know better than I do what I need, want and prefer. Sure...

I will test my new system before moving to this system as my main daily driver. I have to, because this installation has not been tested by anyone (I made it), so it might lack support for some software or something, in which case I need to rebuild the image.



I know a guy who is pro-fasting, who says that it's so healthy, who says that he doesn't need food even for a week and he doesn't care because it's healthy. He also says that he doesn't care what he eats as long as it's healthy. And I know for a fact that he has tried fasting for a few days at a time.

So have I, however my reason wasn't because it's "healthy" (which it actually isn't, only intermittent fasting between meals for up to twenty hours is healthy). My reason was because I either didn't have money for food or I had to live on a very tight budget. And while you can indeed eat healthy on a tight budget, I was practicing an even tighter budget, kind of an "stay alive" budget. Or - at a time - I did not have a place to cook food.

Either way, when I don't eat, I always feel increasingly worse, angry, irritated, frustrated, sad, lonely, and a lot of other negative emotions. Basically everything that I would feel sometimes that's negative comes all at once and it doesn't go away until I eat. Hence my best practice so far is to just eat whenever you're hungry, and to look for variety in food.

Now, theoretically (or according to his personal experience) after fasting I should feel great, cleansed somehow, but I don't feel any of that. The only positive thing that I get after fasting is a flush of Endorphins, which happens every time you eat anyway... Especially if you eat food that actually tastes good. However one should be aware that processed foods are never healthy. Ever. Even though those cookies taste soooo goood! But they taste so good because they contain chemicals that trick our brain into thinking that we are getting all the nutrients that we need. That's why they sell so well!

I would say that me and him are just two completely different people when it comes to our happiness... But I also wonder if he's not simply lying to himself about it. I would like to get to know more people who are food-conscious, or at least who have tried to be at some point in their lives. So if you have - please shoot me a message or write a comment - I would love to talk about your experiences!



I have never been into social platforms, I have never had a Facebook account or understodo what it's for, I've never understood how to use Twitter, and even though I had an Instagram account and uploaded many pictures - I just never got the gist of it!

The way I saw it, on Instagram you have to use tags, like #blackandwhite, for example. And that I always found annoying, because I ended up feeling like an idiot, standing around and looking for tags that normal peope use to attract other people to their pictures for two minutes every time I wanted to post a picture... And even then it didn't really work, I didn't get many visitors to my pictures, so eventually I just dropped it because a) taking pictures with a phone is not photography in my feeling department, and b) it just felt pointless because nobody cared about my pictures.

I guess that's why it just never worked for me - no matter how many things I post, I just don't get visitors. I'm kind of feeling like that about this blog too, I just don't get visitors. I don't understand how people get so many traffic to their blogs, social profiles, social profile pages, or whatever else there is, haha. I know there are fake visitors that people pay for, but I don't think that it's very common (although I do not know whether it is or isn't).

I was suggested some dishonest tactics to attract visitors, but I don't like that, so I haven't used them. I just want to understand how to get visitors, because I used to be an expert in SEO, and even that didn't help a thing... Which means that most people come from social networks. But how the fuck do you develop a social profile?!

So I don't know what to do really... I feel like using social networks and even writing a blog like this is pointless, because I just don't get any visitors, and evidently SEO is not helping one bit, so how can I fix that? How do I get more visitors?

If anybody has any suggestions, please write a comment! I'm honestly looking for a solution to this, because I want to keep sharing things, but I don't want it to feel pointless, because then I will just stop...



A lot of students still go to school when they have a cold, the flu or basically any horrible infectious disease that they have, as long as they can walk. And if they don't want to go to school themselves, most parents make sure that you WILL go.

As a kid, I have a problem with this because I just simply hated school for many reasons (teachers, kids, environment and most of the curriculum), so I always had to really, really be sick (or pretend) to not go to school. Or just skip classes on my own anyway, of course, haha.

But there is one very legitimate reason for why one should not go to school or work when ill, and that is - you're likely to infect others.

Do you remember those few kids that always got the flu and still went to school, caughing and sneezing, barely breathing and looking like someone poured sulfuric acid on their face and hit it a few times with a big hammer while trying to make it better? Or those kids who were complaining every fall, saying "oh I don't feel right, I'm about to get sick!"

Well, all of those people are the reason for mass infections, for nation-wide horrible viruses, some of them are - in a way - even responsible for deaths and permanent complications during flu outbreaks a few years back. They were the ones who decided to go to work and school anyway, knowing that they will spread the virus, no matter how hard they try to cover their nose, sitting in their little box inside their heads.

When I figured that out, I used to absolutely despise those people, and I even refused to go to school - even in 12th grade - when I saw someone sniffling - I stayed home. I never got sick since then. Guess why? I stayed home to protect myself against inconsiderate assholes, while the rest of the population went to schools and jobs for couple of weeks more, getting infected and catching the virus from one another, until finally the government thought that enough people are infected and they can tell the rest that they should stay home. After half the population is fucking sick. Not before. Never made sense to me. But hey, that's just me, using a little bit of logic here...

But I don't mean to put down everyone who goes out when they're sick, we have our needs and important things to do (as unimportant as they might be to someone else...), so if I had a good reason to go out myself (meaning it felt right), I simply would go out without caring whatsoever, just like anyone else does. Perhaps because one could make an argument that each human should protect themselves... Which in this case means - skipping school/work!

Regardless of what I do or think though, some idiot going out after catching a deadly mutated virus will infect people one day, which will cause many thousands, maybe even tens or hundreds of thousands, or even millions to die. But that's a perk of having so many people (7.6b!!!) on the planet - it cleans itself out a little sometimes, and that's the beauty of the beautiful planet Earth...

Here are some less extreme things you can do to protect yourself from the flu, if you don't wanna stay home, haha.

Let me know what you do and what you think of this in the comments!



I don't understand what's with the obsession with names. I know people who keep using quotes from some well-known person, or who ask me if I've read some book or seen some documentary or heard of a person who has been a known follower or a creator of some ideology, or a person who preaches an ideology...

But every time that happens, I think to myself - what the fuck does it matter? Tell me what you have in mind. I'm talking to you, not to some idiot who wrote a book ten years ago to make money from traveling in South America or to "teach" his ideas to people. And I don't care about who created Linux, started IBM or Microsoft, or who is the person with highest IQ in the world.

I don't care! (even though I do know some of the aforementioned names, unfortunately)

What I want when I'm conversing is to hear your thoughts and feelings. And if your feeling is that this guy who's trying to make money with his stupid books that don't even match my own beliefs, well, tell me! But don't get pissed off because I haven't heard of him or if I think he's an idiot, and don't think that I'm stupid because I don't know that. By that logic, I can think that you're fucking stupid because you don't know what's the perfect temperature for making green Sencha tea. Same thing, but at least my knowledge comes in handy if you drink tea. The knowledge about some guy's book or thoughts or that he invented something is absolutely useless to me. I don't know nor want to learn those names.

Maybe for others it is different. I don't know. I'm just annoyed when people look at me as if I was the stupidest person in the world because I don't know some useless fucking stupid name. How about you ask me about quantum physics and we'll see who's the idiot, if knowing or not knowing things is the determining factor whether or not you're stupid. Which is also stupid. If I was like that, I would think that pretty much everybody I meet is stupid. And I have met a lot of awesome people in my life, people who are not stupid and don't know nearly as many things as I do.



Infectious season is starting (or perhaps it has already begun), and a lot of people both hate and love getting sick. A part of me always liked it back in highschool - then I could stay home! But of course it sucks being sick, so I never wanted to get sick anyway. Not a good enough tradeoff, haha.

However, there are some very easy ways to avoid getting sick, and these ways are actually proven by credible scientific studies.

Keep in mind that none of this is useful if you already have a cold! In which case, just get yourself some homemade ginger tea with real honey and lemon juice. Preferably not outta bottle with a bunch of preservatives, haha.


One thing I do is try my best to eat three medium-sized cloves (or the equivalent) of garlic daily. Since the taste of raw garlic is so harsh (and like most raw plant foods - it has some self-defense-against-mammals toxins - that's why you probably never get a craving for raw garlic taste), the best way to prepare garlic for eating is to cut it up into pieces (or crush it), let it stand for a few minutes, then throw it in a pan that isn't set to extremely high temperature or a pot with water (if you're making soup, for example), then just let it cook for at least a couple minutes. That way you will preserve most of the beneficial things and destroy most of the harmful things in garlic. I just add it to pretty much any food that I'm cooking that day, that way as a spice - I love the taste of garlic in my food.

Note that you have to slice garlic and let it stay for a few minutes, and know that you absolutely cannot microwave it.

Now, what garlic does, is it reduces the chance of getting sick by 60 to 70%! Insane, right? Not only that, but it also reduces the severity and duration of sickness by around 20%. Not as much, but hey - chances are you aren't gong to get sick in the first place if you eat it daily!

And if that's not enough motivation to supplement garlic daily, just Google up (or if someone wants me to - I'll write an article, just ask in the comments) on Garlic's benefits. It has an insane amount of benefits for your health in almost any department.

Vitamin C

Supplementing between 0.5g and 1g of Vitamin C daily (part of which can be gained by eating a healthy diet) will not do much good for not catching a cold unless you do much heavy physical work, but it will reduce the severity of symptoms and duration of sickness by a tenth. Not much, but considering other benefits of Vitamin C, it's worth taking anyway. My favorite way to do that is to use pharmaceutical-grade pure Vitamin C powder. Just don't dilute it in water - it's acid, hence it's bad for your teeth!


Taking 75mg of zinc lozenges when you start feeling very slight symptoms of an oncoming flu or cold might reduce the severity and duration of the sickness, however it can also cause nausea and change your taste perception... If you do decide to take it, you should divide the dose and take it throughout the day rather than in one go. Personally - I would not do that because of the side-effects.

General things to do to avoid getting sick

Wash your hands when you come home from a public place

Eat a healthy diet (do not follow fads!)

Getting enough sleep (depends on your genetics, but for most people it's around eight hours)

Avoiding stress as much as realistically possible (for most - it's not a realistic goal, unfortunately)

Hope this helps someone to avoid cold and flu! Please share your experience in the comments, or any other thoughts, questions, feelings or ideas - I always appreciate input!



I was chatting with someone today, and I wrote something that made so much sense to me...

I was thinking about how much understanding I had (ability to just know the answer without knowing formulas or even hearing the teacher out, reading anything, etc.) in the first few grades, and how it diminished later on, along with my ability to code in various programming languages, and many other things. Somehow all my ability to do these things just diminished immensely over time.

Today, when I was texting with that person, I realized that it could be due to lack of sleep. Back at school, since the very first grade, even since the kindergarden (haha!) I was at my peak performance around midnight, so I would only sleep around 1-2 at first (because I was really, really trying to fall asleep), and later on - at 3-4 (same story, sometimes laying in bed for an hour or two), which eventually turned into 4-5am. I had to wake up at 7:45 or so, and I would often fall asleep way past 5am, meaning I would get between two and three hours of sleep most of the weekdays.

None of that is upbringing, my grandparents - for example - would be tight asleep way before nine in the evening. My mom would try to sleep before ten. I just have a different circadian rhythm - my body starts secreting serotonin later than that of most people, which means that my circadian day starts later than for most people.

Now, another problem was that I only learned things that I was interested in (meaning I would learn a lot on my own, but nothing that they teach at school, or some things that they teach in 12th grade or university, and I was in third or fourth grade, or I was learning things that are up-to-date with the scientific research instead of what they would teach us at school - back from the forties or sixties.

So my problem was that I just had no interest in most things that they taught at school, and those things that I did have any interest in - I either already knew, they were taught in a way that was unacceptable to me (I find the teaching methods to be extremely inefficient, and inefficiency in learning annoys me - I'm very fast-paced at getting things done), or the information was simply outdated, which - when I realized - lead me to being unable to trust what the teachers told us.

How Kids Prepare for Tests

Back at school I used to just read things over and over before the test. I would remember some things, others - I would not due to lack of sleep, very poor diet, and because I was simply not interested in the things I had to remember to get a good grade. I never cared for grades, I always thought it's stupid to learn things that you have no interest in (hence things that are useless for me).

Later I saw a video from TED (very good website - you should watch a lot of those videos... I love it) that was about how kids these days prepare for tests at school. Apparently a lot of kids do the same thing, except they do not have the thinking that I do, which means that they give a lot more time than an hour or so to prepare for the tests. But after the test - they barely remember anything at all! That's because they study for the test, not to have the knowledge (most of it is outdated or useless anyway).

So if you think about that, the school system is absolutely broken and rather useless, it's a waste of at least twelve years of your life. Not to mention that a lot of schools try to indoctrinate various belief systems into their students, and I don't know about you, but someone telling me how to think or what to feel - or worse of all, manipulate me into that - that's the worst thing anybody can do to me.

How Lack of Sleep Affects Your Health Long-Term

Along with everything that I mentioned above, I always had a problem - ever since I was very young - with waking up early and going to sleep early. And it's not my upbringing. It's my genetics.

Lack of sleep during developmental years - when you are growing up - disrupts your brain development. Not only that, but it also disrupts the way you interact with your environment. Meaning that it's harder to concentrate, form memories, access memories, physically interact with your environment, and even severely increases the chance of obesity! I'm a really thin and fit guy though, so somehow that didn't affect me (must be genes), but the rest - I can definitely attest that I had trouble forming memories, I became more clumsy, and I stopped "just knowing the answer". Which basically means that I felt a lot less smart than I was before, which affected my self-esteem a lot. I identify as a smart guy with insane memory, and if I do not feel that - I feel bad.

Lack of sleep - and especially chronic sleep deprivation - also leads to depression, hyperactivity, inattention, impulsiveness, eating disorders (I feel like eating all the time when I am sleep deprived, for example; luckily it doesn't show, haha), anxiety, substance abuse, it increases your chance for heart disease, diabetes, it severely weakens your immunity system, affects your balance, sex drive, makes you irritable, paranoid, affects your digestive system (and pretty much every other process in your body negatively), your body clears less toxins out of your body (even those associated with Alzheimer's, disrupts your creativity and ability to think and reason, severely shortens your lifespan -- I could go on and on... If you don't believe me, all you have to do is Google "sleep deprivation" or "chronic lack of sleep" or something along the lines of that.

And while I would suggest you getting your sleep, I also suggest you following your natural genetic circadian rhythm no matter what. So if you are like me, and you follow this advice, you are basically fucked... Unless you somehow manage to get out of this society, which is a really, really hard task.

Bottom line is - this society is broken for people like me - there isn't many, but a few percent of the population should be enough for the society to be able to account for such people. It angers me that I have to be a part of a society that does not accept it.

My experience in being chronically ​sleep-deprived

I can tell you that I have experienced a lot of these symptoms. For example, by the end of the week I could feel heart palpitations, I wasn't able to concentrate, I would sometimes even forget what I was about to say, my memory formation was impacted, I wanted to eat all the time, I was increasingly more irritable and impatient, my immunity was shot (even though I have really good immunity - must be genes, again), sometimes I would feel paranoid and anxious, and I would simply just feel heaviness in my body... I mean, I was basically unable to operate properly, and eventually I adapted to work around a lot of these things, but it still did not change the fact that these symptoms were there.

The only thing that I did like about lack of sleep was when by the end of the week I was able to lucid dream, or hallucinate in m mind. It was like taking psychedelics, so eventually I just waited for those days and embraced it by daydreaming for insane amounts of time. And sometimes I even miss that... But I know it's not good for me and I do not do it on purpose, because you either have to be awake for over forty hours or stay really sleep deprived for four or five days.

That's my experience. What's yours? I would love to read about your experience in the comments - please share if you wish!



Most people have their preferences for absolutely anything, and that includes on how they use their computer - whether there's many icons on the desktop or not, if their keyboard is loud or quiet, if it's a laptop or desktop rubber-dome keyboard, etc., I could go on for hours!

My preference for typing - and typing is really important for me - is mechanical keyboards. Cherry MX Blue switches, to be precise. However keyboards with those switches cost a lot (namely Das Keyboard), so - being realistic about my budget - I had to look for something cheaper.

That was when I discovered that there are rip-off switches and cheap mechanical keyboards. And since I am very sensitive to everything I experience (light, sound, taste, touch, etc.), I of course wanted to investigate if I would like the blue rip-off switches. That's when I found this comparison of mechanical keyboard switches . Check it out, after you read the rest!

Why use mechanical keyboard?

I used simple rubber dome keyboards since I was a kid, that's the most common type of a keyboard. I don't like them so much, and after a couple (or a few) months they start becoming rigid and the rubber hardens, which makes it rather uncomfortable to type on - at least for me.

Then there's the low-profile rubber-dome, which is the laptop keyboards. Those I am kind of okay with, but... I'm still not that big a fan of them. Not to mention that laptop keyboards often feel rather flimsy.

Then there is the mechanical keyboards, and there are many types of them. The most common denomination is Cherry MX switches - reds, blues, browns and blacks. There are different types from older keyboards, as well as a lot of rip-offs from newer ones. But the idea is that blacks are for gaming - when you press the key, it goes very smoothly, without any feedback (you do not feel it when it is registered as a keypress physically), browns - you feel when they are registered as a click, but you do not hear anything, reds are a mix between browns and blacks, and blues - you feel the click and you hear it pretty loud, it's like a typewriter. Those are the ones I like, although I have not owned a keyboard with blues yet.

Now, the reason why you would want to have a mechanical keyboard is... Well, the feeling! And if you are a practical person, then in theory the keyboard will last you a hell of a lot longer. But that should not be your buying point. Feeling should.

Currently I am looking at one of these two keyboards: E-YUANSU Z-77 87 Keys or TOMOKO 87 Key (backlit). I'm leaning towards the one that isn't backlit, because I noticed that I never look at the keyboard when typing, and when typing I also dislike lights in the background. I also prefer the font on that keyboard over the even more strange font of Tomoko. Although you can always buy new keycaps for mechanical keyboards (that's another advantage!). But, if I had more money, I'd just buy a Das Keyboard, because they - as far as I know - are the best keyboards around for a very reasonable price (around 120eu, I think).

Let me know what you think, if you have experience with such keyboards, and if this article gave you any useful information!

And feel free to ask any questions in the comments, even if you need help choosing a keyboard!



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