I am not the type of person who likes talking about my feelings. I hate it, to makes me feel vulnerable. I hate feelings just in general, or at least showing them. I am extremely sensitive and I take pretty much everything personally which can make it really difficult for me to hide my feelings. Some people say that I'm an easy read, they can tell really easily but others are clueless. I do fool a lot of people though, I always have, I'm good at faking feelings. Now don't get me wrong, when I say I hate feelings, that doesn't make me an emotionless person who avoids feeling things, I still feel things, I just don't show the things I'm feeling for others. I don't ever wanna hurt anyone and I don't ever wanna get hurt so I usually find that not having any real feelings about stuff makes things easier.
I don't like talking to people about my feelings and it's something that I'm working on and trying to be better at. I feel like I don't like to talk about it because I don't always know the reason that I'm feeling a certain way, or I feel like I don't have a reason to be feeling that way so I instead push it away. Because I don't like talking about how I feel, I started keeping a 'feelings journal' (sounds dumb I know but hang with me). It's actually really helped me, I have always had problems controlling my anger and feelings and often let them build up until everything explodes, but keeping a journal has helped me get rid of my feelings in a way that works for me, a way that doesn't make me feel uncomfortable. One of my closest friend always tries to get me to explain what means to me and I always say, you're you, and he gets annoyed and says I know I'm me but who is that to you. The truth is I don't know, I can't describe what people mean to me, a lot of times its because there isn't a word that I can use to explain what the person means to me, but other times its just that I don't know. I don't know how to describe my feelings i don't know how to describe the meaning someone has to me. Is that really a problem though? I know how much that person means to me and I shouldn't have to explain why the person means something to me.