More often than I want to admit I sit and scroll down other peoples blogs and think to myself ''Wow their life really must be amazing''. Even though it might say that they are fighting a cold and aren't feeling well at the moment I'm like ''Yep I'd like that life''. Sometimes I just can't help but wondering, what are you all doing to be able to make a normal Sunday seem so perfect? How do you all manage to go out so much and how on earth do you manage to make your blog look so stunning all the time?

Then I scroll down my own blog and I'm like ''What are you talking about, people are probably wondering how you are able to go out so much and how you can make life look so great''. If I really think about it, without my own feelings attached, being an actress/songwriter living in LA probably seems to be a pretty good life, and I totally go out and do a lot of fun things on top of that. Only I don't feel that way.

It's funny how great something can look on paper, on a blog, and then in real life it's a whole other thing. While you see pictures of delicious food I feel the guilt of once again spending money I don't really have. While you see pictures of a warm sunny day in California I'm constantly feeling like I'm living on borrowed time. Like this life doesn't completely belong to me. You don't know all of this, how could you? They say a picture can sometimes tell you all the things you need to know about a situation, but sometimes a pictures doesn't tell you anything. Or sometimes a pictures tells you everything but what's actually going on.

This was just something I wanted to bring up since I've promised myself to keep this blog as honest as possible, and while having fun and eating out is a big part of my life there's much more to it. My life is just like yours, very much imperfect. Filled with problems I sometimes have no idea how to solve and get through. Doesn't it feel kind of good to know that this is how all our lives are? Though I know it can be very hard to believe sometimes when you scroll down someones Instagram feed. I never want it to seem like I'm living the ultimate perfect life because there's no such thing. It's important to me that people know that since I am a person who is constantly putting content out there. I don't ever want anyone to look at my blog and think my life is better than theirs.

That's all I have to say for tonight. Thank you so much to everyone who really takes the time to read this blog or who are even just checking in. It means the world to me! <3


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Sitting at the grove with a goundworks coffee and waiting for Yasmine. We're going to watch Fifty Shades in the theaters, anyone seen it? If so what did you think? I haven't even seen the second one haha! I didn't really love the books like so many others did, they just made me so angry I had to stop.

Woke up in a really good mood today. Then I found out my camera isn't working and that I have to take it to a repair shop. Exactly what I needed, or not. I love my baby so it seriously hurts knowing it's broken... Anyway anyway making the best out of this Sunday by going to the movies, and now Yasmine arrived so I gotta go.

Have a wonderful Sunday everyone<3


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Café Gratitude, I kind of really liked this place. Don't I say that about every single place I go to tough? Maybe I should make a category ''where not to go in LA'' as well? No, I like to stay on the positive side and show you all the great spots to visit. How sad wouldn't it be to go look for bad restaurants when there's so many good once?

I like the name of this place. They have even named all their bowls names like ''Humble'' and ''Devoted''. Makes it a little more fun and interesting. Like hm, how do I feel today? I feel super humble so let's get a humble bowl! Bad joke yes.

Thumbs up for this place, if you ever get to Beverly Hills, try it out!

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How many times haven't you heard that you should ''Stop trying so hard''? As if that was the answer to everything. ''Be yourself and it will all work out''. You want to know something? It's really freaking hard not to try. It's hard not to try when you really like someone, it's hard not to try when you really want something and it's hard not to try when all you want is to feel like you stand out once in a while.

How do we know which voice is ours? How do we know when we are trying to much? When we're not being true to ourselves anymore? It's really hard just to be and not to overthink. We get so affected by everything that happens around us that sometimes it's hard to know what's really us and what's them. It's easy to tell someone to be themselves, to make their own decisions, to go on what they feel, but is anyone ever completely themselves? More or less I guess.

I do believe that trying to hard usually doesn't end up being the greatest thing. Trying to hard can a lot of times be seen as being desperate, and who wants desperate right? This just drives me crazy sometimes. I can't try to hard cause I might seem desperate but if I don't try at all will I become completely invisible? So here I am, stuck in between. I feel like I've always been stuck in the middle of all this. Stuck in between wanting to stand out and fitting in to the social norms. I don't want to fit in, I've never really wanted that, but sometimes it's like my own voice disappears among all the other voices around me.

I think it all comes down to just being however you feel like being in the moment. We are so many things and we feel different things every day. There's really no wrong or right way to be, so that's why I guess we always tell people to just be. What I've been trying to figure out is what ''just be'' means, what it means to me and how not to get so affected by the voices around me. A lot of the times I think the answer is to not over think it, because that's when things get messy. Maybe we shouldn't think so much about how to act and just act instead. Act on what we feel in the moment. Not that acting on feelings always turns out to be the right thing, but at the end of the day is it so horrible to be ''wrong''? Maybe it's better to be wrong than to never say or feel anything at all?


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At the moment: Cold drinks, a sun that is annoyingly strong, in a very pretty Beverly Hills, with a really good friend. That pretty much sums up this moment and my Friday afternoon. Thank you god for these kind of days, where you don't do much but it still feels okay. Okay to be lazy, okay to enjoy, okay to feel like everything that isn't okay at least is okay for the moment. That's how I feel right now. Stressed but not so stressed at the same time. Not okay but very much okay after all.

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Since it's Thursday and I really needed something to share me up I thought I would do a little throwback here on my blog! How beautiful isn't this view? I spent a big part of my first year here in the states traveling with my friend Bo. We went everywhere on the West Coast pretty much and it's something I always look back at and miss. One weekend we decided to hike in the Grand Canyon Arizona. It's a place I've always been wanting to visit and I'm glad I have that checked off my bucket list now! 

It's just something abut the desert, the orange view. I've always loved it and I've always found it so beautiful. I also really like the dry air for some reason. This is a memory I will always keep with me and I can't wait for my next trip to god knows where. I really miss traveling and being on the road, I miss being so spontaneous, to just randomly go places. I have so many places I still want to visit, HAVE to visit. What are your dream destinations? Right now I'm craving to go to Alaska. I need some more nature and fresh air in my life.    

Happy Thursday everyone! 

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Yesterday we had our neighbors over for Wine and dinner. They brought the dinner and we brought the wine! People should really take the time to get to know their neighbors, it's so awesome having good friends living next door. Best part of it all is when you realize that you don't have a wine opener late at night and you can just run next door to get one. No need to run to the store ;) No but seriously, I'm so happy that we met Marie and Nick, it's fun to be able to do these kind of dinners, and it's great meeting friends that shares the same passion as you do!

Today it's valentines day and I spent most of it in bed with my best friend watching sad romantic movies. I love sad movies, I love to cry, at the same time as I hate it. A love hate kinda thing. Now I'm ending my night at my favorite café in Burbank called Pricilla's. I've actually never blogged about this place, probably because I always go here late at night and just want to enjoy my time without bringing a camera along.

Hope you all have had a great Wednesday and happy Valentines day! <3

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I am a big fan of food bowls, and LA happens to have a lot of places where you can find great bowls. Tocaya Organica is my absolute favorite place to go to whenever I feel like having one. They serve modern Mexican food, and just to put it out there, I freaking love Mexican food.

Their bowls are super tasty, very healthy and filling at the same time. I'm also a big fan of their limeade drinks that comes in a bunch of different flavors. I'm absolutely not a person who constantly needs to eat healthy, I ''cheat'' about every day. Though I really enjoy food that I know is good for my body and soul. I used to eat fast food everyday and it made me extremely tired, grumpy and just not happy with the way I lived. I do believe having a healthy mind is the most important thing of all. My mind feels happy when my body feels happy and the other way around.

LA makes it easier to enjoy healthy food because of the fact that there are so many places that has GOOD TASTING HEALTHY food. I could for sure not live on boring salads every day, but bowls that have a lot of fun healthy stuff in them, YES please!


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I wasn't sure if I was ever going to release this song as the perfectionist I am. There always seem to be something left that I want to ''fix'', but knowing I'm not perfect and so will never my music be, I finally decided that it was time to put something out there. Well, Haskel kind of made that decision for me but at least I pressed the ''upload'' button ;)

This song is called Run To You. This song means a lot to me for many different reasons, most of them I'll keep to myself. I will tell you thought that it's about someone that I once used to know, someone who used to mean a lot to me. I'll leave the rest up to you! Isn't that the best thing when you listen to music? Creating your own meaning of the song? I love that anyway.

Enjoy!

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Being an artist has changed so many things for me. Since I'm a person who tends to run from any type of strong feelings it has really been a big challenge for me being here in LA. Some days I have this great feeling within like I'm finally getting closer to myself, accepting every part of me and I just know that I'm heading in the right direction. While some days I can't stand living in my own head and body. I want to get out, press pause or just somehow shut off my brain completely.

The fact that I want to work in the arts makes me have to constantly push through this. It has also taught me the right ways to go through certain things. Not that there's just one right way to do it. Before when things got hard I used to have no emotion for it, in fact, a few of the worst moments in my life I felt absolutely nothing for. That's of course not true, I did feel something, but decided it was better not to feel. It's NEVER better not to feel, today I would always choose to feel. Not only because I'm an actor and a songwriter, but because that's what makes life life. I used to long to feel real pain, mostly because the moments when I did I managed to write killer songs, and having strong emotions just made me feel more real and less trapped.

It's still one of my biggest struggles in life, I still haven't managed to let myself go, but at least I'm working on it everyday. I think that's one of the biggest reasons to why things feel really hard and challenging at the moment, the fact that I'm constantly working on my insecurities and putting myself in situations that makes me feel really uncomfortable. Uncomfortable in a good way though. We should never give up on ourselves, as hard as it is to come to terms with your insecurities it's better to know about them than to just live and pretend that they are not there. The good thing about knowing is that you can do something about it. The hard thing about knowing is feeling like now you have to do something about it. A lot of times it's a lot easier to just try to forget about it, but in the long run I think it's much better to go through whatever you need to go through. Self growth is probably one of the most important things to me, so no matter how I feel about it in the moment I would always choose to deal with it rather than just forgetting about it. Because we don't really forget either, it's just going to be there in the back of our heads preventing us from achieve the things we want to achieve.

I'm really glad I've chosen to work in this field even though it's very emotionally challenging. A lot of people don't know about it, but the amount of work artists put behind every song, dance, role and painting is incredible. The way artists put themselves out there for the whole world to see, completely open and naked, why would someone ever want to do that? Why would I ever want to do that? Because it's incredibly healing at the same time as it's scary. It's fun, wild and brave. Letting people see you and feel because of you, that feeling is worth every single little insecurity that comes with it.


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