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I'd like to say I had an epiphany this week, but it sounds a bit dramatic and over the top. This enlightenment concerned some mental blocks that I noticed still steer me in certain directions. I noticed that I've been strongly influenced by others and that their opinions still haunt in the back of my mind.

These thoughts can be quotes like "a continuous workout under 20 minutes is a waste because under that time you don't get to burn fat". Ok, this might be out of context but I remember this being said to me and what it did was make me unappreciative of any exercise I did that would be under that time frame. I felt, I had to do more more more and wasn't OK, on a walk I had to march whilst at red lights, I would add extra km to my walks home just so that I felt I had accomplished. And it never felt enough. That sentence makes sense, you need to work out long enough for the fat burn to start and get the body going. But hey, many HIIT training might just be 30 min or under, so how does that equation work out?

All exercise is good! And this mental block is picked up from my *attic* and thrown out. Its better to exercise 20 min or under, than stress about doing a longer session just to hit a wall. In addition, one should be more appreciative of any accomplishment. I'm saying this to those whom rarely exercise and are in a similar rut as I am, to those whom also feel that even the small things do not have a great impact, but they do!

I had an amazing discussion with one of my friends. He has lost a significant amount of weight through the small changes in life. First alcohol was reduced, so less after works during the month or beer with a dinner. Then walking to and from work was added, where upon he started swimming a couple of times a week. These small tweaks started a change that increased the hunger for more. He then added some exercise sessions per week and focused on his diet. Suddenly he found himself going to the gym on his holiday and makes sure he walks at least 10000 steps during the day :) At the moment he is going to the gym 4-5 times a week!!

The point is, you HAVE to start small and set realistic goals. Walking or cycling to the shop, taking the dog for an extra walk, taking the stairs, always choosing the one more extra small exercises does add up. When this is a part of your lifestyle then it's easier to add longer, harder and more frequent exercises. So, I have decided to do more of the little things. In addition, any HIIT, pram walk or a run is just the extra awesomeness that will tone my body.

These comments from friends, family members or even a boyfriend/girlfriend can make you focus on the wrong thing. The above quote is one of many I have emptied from my mind and it is easier to move on when your head is clear!

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I have very sensitive skin that is also extremely dry on the surface. In addition, using makeup and other facial products blocks my pores and I get acne. When winter arrives I feel like my skin reacts and just flakes off πŸ˜ƒ At it's worst i need to use cortisone cream to keep the rash at its minimum, otherwise it can be on my eyelids. Not the most attractive sight and I do not want to use cortisone if possible.

Luckily during my pregnancy, my skin got better. In the beginning it was extremely bad, like I was a teen again. Spots everywhere, even on my upper back... Well after the first trimester suddenly my skin was beautiful (in the sense that it wad flawless and sheer) and luckily it has stayed that way until this day πŸ™

My issue has been to find the perfect facial products. In a foundation I need enough coverage to balance the unevenness of the skin plus hide my acne scars. In contrary the foundation can't be to thick, otherwise my skin cracks and looks like an ancient vase with a cracked glaze πŸ˜‚

Either way I do hope my purchases will work for me. I went to Twistbe to buy Olivia Klein and found at the same time a new foundation.

They suggested for my skin the Cream & Wash and then the Sensitive Cream. I wanted to try out the two products before buying more of them and wasting money. Some cosmetiques have given me a rash, so I am very careful.

To my positive surprise these products work for me. My skin is soft and moist. Of course the tip of my nose seems to still want to flake. I've been using them for over a week now and I think I am going to buy the Hydrating Toner and the Sensitive Serum.

Yes before I forget, about the foundation. You can buy a Lauren Brooke Cosmetiques foundation tester at Twistbe, they are 1,5€ each and I could use mine three times. I use the Natural 20 and for me it works. The consistency is similar to a mousse with a "wax" finish. Gives me an instant face lift ;)

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One of my very my best friend came to visit from Lapland. She has moved there in the autumn because of work. I really miss her and it's a blast when we meet. It's like no time has passed and we just talk, talk and talk! We have the best discussions. Everything between family and friends to more deeper subjects as to childhood memories. We ponder on self esteem, self awareness and all things that have to do with mindfulness. Of course we have a lot of laughs! Also Baby I was happy to see her godparent.

It was a sunny day, so we went to Helsinki center and Visited the Old Market Hall 😍



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November 2017 we embraced Helsinki towards Mauritius. This was my first trip over the equator and to the tropics. Unfortunately we had to fly via Amsterdam and this would have been ok if we wouldn't have been travelling with a 6 month old baby.

Why Mauritius?

To begin with its good to state that we have family there. My uncle lives there with his Mauritian wife and is enjoying a comfortable pensioners life. In addition we thought the destination is quite safe no malaria or dengue.. The time zone is only + 2 hours from Finland and well its a paradise island.

Mauritius is a small (big) island in the Indian Ocean. If looking at the map, you could say its fairly close to Madagascar. Due to its history there is a mixture African, Indian, English andFrench culture. Basically the people speak French or Creole even if official language is English and the cuisine was strongly influenced by India.

Mauritius is know for its lovely beaches, coral reefs, turquoise sea, sugarcane, rum and the tropical nature.

The flights to Mauritius

As mentioned, we had the misfortune of having to fly with a connecting flight. We booked through TUI but we could have skipped them as they were only an unneeded in-between. When shit hit the fan as it did on the way home, TUI washed their hands from helping us, i'll get to that part later.

The flights were KLM and I have to say the plane was nice and the services good. We had luckily booked he bassinet so we had extra leg room and Isabel could sleep in the cot just above our feet. The only downside with KLM was the fact that they do not provide plastic bags for prams etc. and you couldn't ether buy one from them.

Our total flight time was about 16 hours, bearable and luckily our daughter is calm one. She likes to be in the lap and loved all the attention. We arrived at 6 am so she also slept half of the flight time.


The hotel

After a nice and bumpy cab ride we had finally arrived to the hotel. On a side note, they have really good roads in case you wan to hire a car. but remember the drive on the left side!

It was the Ravenala Attitude and rated as 4 starts. All an all the hotel was nice and we enjoyed our couple of weeks. The area was big with 3 pools, 8 restaurants, a private beach and a spa. We had taken the all inclusive package and found that it was a really good idea when traveling with a baby. All you needed, was to sit down and order, knowing the bill has already been paid for.

We loved some of the restaurants which were Madam Ming and Mozaik.

Two of their restaurants were of the all in inclusive list so we skipped them, otherwise you could order anywhere by your last name.


We enjoyed ourselves; starting with a huge breakfast, then to the beach for a swim and to pick seashells. After lunch we would be by the pool before heading back to change for dinner.

Isabel slept so well because of the heat. We had barely any nights with a night feed *awesome*

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I noticed my latest post been of a more heavier stuff. So I feel it needs to be balanced out. Today we are celebrating my friends baby shower. This trend has grown more and more popular in Finland and is becoming a tradition.

Quite often the baby's gender is known, so the theme is based on that. Pink for girl and blue for boys kind of thing. I haven't yet been to a baby shower where the gender would be announced. That would be fun though: everyone teamed up to the gender they think the baby is and then the gender is revealed by cutting up a cake which has either or color inside it.

Back to the topic, we know the gender and it's a girl....by 95% accuracy. There are surprises and then the boy will have a nice set of pink clothes to go trough for at least the first 6 months ;)

The hosts had really put all in with nice drinks including some candy floss on top. Just loved the baby cake and the small shoes on top <3

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After having Isabel I noticed a shift and change in my attitude. Basically the baby blues had an affect on me but also the way I saw myself and others. I suddenly became more conscious of how I treat myself and most importantly, how I let others treat me. It made me sad, because I knew I had to make some changes that will hurt, however, the outcome will increase my well-being..

Al of a sudden, I had a higher threshold for letting others mock me. I am well know for using myself as a target for my own and anyone else's humor. But now, when I have a daughter, I want her to see that people also respect me. Of course, I do like a joke and can laugh at myself. The difference is, I will not let anyone laugh at me or put me down. I've had a low self esteem for so long and neglected the fact that there are jokes and then there are jokes.

I'm not trying to sound like Mother Teresa here, and definitely I will make a mishap of joking on someone else's expense. The difference is, if I feel I am not appreciated and someone is trying to boost their ego by trashing me, then they are out.

Through time my empathy has changed and tolerance for BS as well. I feel for others only if they can also show compassion and understand when they are doing harm. One can't through stones if they have committed the same sin.

So to sum this up. My skin is thicker, I am an example for my daughter and she needs someone she can respect and look up to. That's what I am aiming at and that is also what she deserves.

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It's come to my attention that saying sorry is something that you should learn as a child. My friend told me that a person needs to be mature enough to understand the importance of saying sorry, even if it is the last thing you feel like doing. She said how she recollected the feeling of being young and having to say "I'm sorry", even if it was a thing she felt she didn't want to do. It is a talent we finally understand to embrace through trial and error.

To say sorry

Understanding when to say sorry is something you learn by time. For me it is also a measurement how well the other person actually is able to reflect on their own behavior. Of course we have to think big, there are many situations where you do not need to apologize. But I want to focus on the subjects were one knows when to be mad and when to take responsibility for their own actions.

Intention

Sometimes you hurt someone else, and in many cases it is unintended. Of course this could be deliberated: "how could the person X not understand this or that would hurt someone?". Which gives you two outcomes: either the person is mean or the the person is senseless.

I see it as a question of responsibility. A responsibility for both parts to understand when to actually get upset and when you have to understand where the other one is coming from.

for me it is a scale, on one side you have the responsibility of your own and others feelings. Think to yourself "is this something I should get upset about? worth it?" and making sure you know that it was unintentional from the other persons part.

And on the other side of the scale is taking responsibility for either your actions or your reaction. "I was hurt, but I do not need to hurt back". Where upon it is good to remember to accept your and the other persons feelings. Unfortunately feelings are more difficult to govern, they seem to go all over the place. Finding sense and clarity is harder in a mind that is full of feelings.


Forbidden thoughts

Forbidden thoughts is one of my favorite subjects. Not because it sounds like a double meaning for you know what, but for the fact that we all have forbidden thoughts we are embarrassed to share. These are for instance thoughts were you feel you should be grateful for something but just cant be. It is a common problem when life is actually pretty good and you feel you have plenty of options in life.

These forbidden thoughts often become our nemesis, haunting us and makes us upset about what to be upset about. If we complain -> we offend and if just suck it in we feel -> miserable.

the reason I wanted to add this pert in this text is because these forbidden thought are often the cause of us having a hard time understanding when to get hurt and when to understand someone else. Tha is why I believe that saying sorry means you are mature enough to have empathy to actually understand the bigger picture. We are in charge of how we make ourselves and others feel, but getting hurt is always up to us.

Letting go

Sometimes the best thing to do is to let go. Letting go is not the same as giving up! Letting go is a healthy way of making a conscious choice of not pursuing a certain feeling/situation anymore. If something is harmful to you and you have an option of letting it go, you should. Hanging on and dragging the same situation on and on will drain you from actually accomplishing better things in life. Letting go is quite hard, but from my own experience, very refreshing. When you ditch negative thoughts you will find more time to think and pursuit the positive life has to offer. You free space in you mind for things that nurture your growth. We only have one body and one life, use it well.

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Nope, this post is not gonna go into too deep stuff about "who am I". That stuff could go on for pages. You'll get to know me through time :)

But, not to be too mysterious I thought I should at least present myself. As we have been brought up to do, not going to be rude now am I. To start of with a bit of history, just a dab.. I am born and raised in Finland and today I live on an island in the Finnish archipelago, in Helsinki. Luckily enough, it's a big Island, not having many cast away moments here, talking to my tennis balls... even If i have the occasional meltdown here and there. Occasional, I might be sugar coating a bit, but not gonna say anything else before taking it past my therapist ;)

Who am I? If I answer, it would be as following: artsy, craftsy, black humor with the contrast of too much empathy. Its a bit bipolar in one sense, but one has to live life to the fullest. * I think I need to underline, that my humor is for some inappropriate, with a lot of satire. So, I do hope everyone whom reads my posts can take my stuff with a real pinch of salt. I am not here to offend. Just stating this in here before in case anyone might have their day ruined by me.

If you ask my friends you might get a totally different answer, even a better one if I am not in the room ;) Can't speak fro them. 

I love handicrafts and cooking! I also like second hand shopping, meeting up with friends and most of all, raising my little girl Isabel <3 We have lived here for 3 years and just love it. The nature, sea, family friendliness but still very close to the city center. We are a multilingual family which makes life quite fun, since we can't speak any of them without being at least once or twice grammatically incorrect. Still I feel it is a blessing to speak 3 languages fluently and understand plenty more, because of it, so I give a mental "zip it" to people whom laughs at me or my friends. Poor are those whom benefit from others misfortune, I say. This became serious in a matter of seconds :D 

Back to the post... Because I am just getting started I do believe my text and their context might very and change through time, before I find a preferable flow. I am also up for suggestions!

Picture #1: after a couple of mojitos on our Vaycay to Bodrum

Picture#2 what happens after more than a couple of mojitos...

best thing ever in my life <3

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