I learned that people leave. Even if they have promised a thousand times that they won't.

I say that I don't want to talk about it. Actually, I do, but I'm afraid of your reaction. I'm afraid that you'll never see me as an equal again. I'm afraid of the pity in your eyes once you realize how screwed up I really am.

Because sometimes people do feel that way. Sometimes your life feels like it's caving in on you. Sometimes people really do feel like they don't want to exist, like they just want to curl up into a ball, and go into that place between life and death. Saying "I don't want to exist", isn't saying "I want to die". It's saying "I wish that, for the time being, I could go somewhere and not have to feel". I don't think there's anything wrong with that. And if you don't know how it feels, then you have no place to judge anyone who does.



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