Mini-date night yesterday in Soho. Met up with Delph after I finished my shift and we walked through central London for a while. Went to this super cute little place called KOYA for dinner. Absolutely delicious. If you're in London - go, go, go! Took some crappy pictures with my phone and ate some less crappy food with chopsticks. Hot noodle soup, mixed seaweed and vegetable tempura on the side. Sneakily listened to the french family next to us having an argument and then we left. Walked in the rain, missed the bus and walked some more. Went home to watch a movie but fell asleep straight away. Romantic as always.
Working, Working & Working. Everyday I'm working. Being a lazy little fashion student and having a full time job sure does have it strong differences. Still haven't deiced which I like better. Is it possible to get the same salary and still go back to school? No? Fine. Well this is good for now anyway. And despite my best effort to sound as bitter and sarcastic as I possible can, I do actually love this place. It is really nice to, after all the drama, have a great job that I can commit to without feeling like I'm wasting my time doing something I don't want to do. + I have gotten so many swag pieces for my uniform that I could never really complain. Thx JP
I have so much inspiration and so little spare time atm. Really miss photographing beautiful people in strange ways. Badly. And you know how it sometimes feels like you just want to do something but you don't know what? I'm the complete opposite of that right now. I know exactly what I want to do and what I want to accomplish but have absolutely zero change of pursuing it. Bad timing and a shitty camera is holding me back but I can feel within me how I'm not gonna last much longer. My fingers are itching, they've been restless for far too long & I can't wait anymore. I really, really, really don't want to. Soon I'll come home with an overpriced Canon and start terrorising different magazines about how and when I can contribute with my pics and writing. Super excited.
Spent last night at Nora's & Ellen's place. From South Kensington to Kings Cross station in twenty minutes. Bus nr.17 towards Holloway and six minutes later I was outside. The dirty pub next to their big white door had already closed and I didn't have to go through the mandatory small talk with the customers in the smoking area. Thank God. Rang the doorbell at exactly 7.15pm with a bottle of Sainsbury's finest in one hand and my fake leather bag in the other. The happiest hug of the day welcomed me in the entrance and we both went upstairs. Another white door later and the smell of lightly grilled aubergine hit me right in my freezing face. What a wonderful feeling. Sat down on a kitchen chair and started going through one of the three bottles that were nicely displayed on the far end table. White, rosé & red. I'll just take one of each please. An hour later and we were all getting tipsy enough to let go if the mandatory so how have you been-talk and move on to the more interesting conversations. Bad tinder dates, future careers and broken hearts. Then I took some selfies and admired the typical Scandinavian interior in the typical London apartment.
A few minutes past midnight and I'm back in the hallway. Putting on my dirty shoes and walks back to the station. Brixton, Three Eight Four and a drunk girlfriend. Aperol Spritz and popcorn war. Plenty of gossip that I cannot remember (I guess the wine had taken over by then). Stayed for as long as we could and ran to the bus when the bar closed. Kisses and cuddles in the cold. Got some late night crisps and then we started fighting. Drunk Tilda is always looking for drama. I'm exhausting. So is she. A perfect match I would say. How lucky aren't we?
After fighting my way through most of south east London (= running like a maniac from station to station) I managed to survive the tube strike and arrive just in time for my first day at James Perse in the Chelsea store. What a cute little shop. Honestly, wouldn't mind living there for a while.
178 Walton Street, SW3 2JL, London - in case you want to come and visit. Text me when you're near and please don't hesitate to bring me food. I accept bribes of all kinds.
Got so nostalgic walking through Chelsea. Feels like such a long time ago since I first moved there. Little Tilda. January 2016. Confused and egocentric. But to be fair, so were probably the rest of the people living there as well. At least I wasn't alone.
First day at work and first lunch break ever. Spending it in a quiet basement on Berkeley Street. Drinking a huge glass of ice coffee and a pink hey look at me I'm so fit-kind of juice. Writing a short story about a boy who loves another boy, about warm lips and their first touch. Because I can be gay on so many levels.
One day I'll write a book about this.
Kvällen är här. Vi är här. Inne på hans rum. Långa växter i vita krukor, tomma kaffekoppar i tjock keramik. Ensamt stående på det mörka ekbordet längst väggen framför dörren. Allt påminner så mycket om honom. Hans personlighet ligger i väggarna och allt som finns här är en perfekt materialistisk kopia av hans alldeles unika smak.
Han sitter djupt nersjunken i den gamla fåtöljen i hörnan av rummet. Jag sitter på sängen med bena i kors. Blöta skor på täcket och jackan över axlarna. Det är ju ändå inte mitt hem. Han läser en bok om mysterier och om hur saker kommer till i en annan värld. Jag tänkter på mitt. Vi låter tiden gå och njuter av varandras ensamhet.
Snart ger han upp och lämnar det sista kapitlet oläst. Sträcker ut sina ben och går genom rummet, bort till mig. Jag känner hans fingertoppar emot min rosiga kind. Han kysser mig och jag blir så medveten. Varje del av min tunna kropp vaknar till liv och jag önskade för en sekund att känslan aldrig skulle försvinna.
Nu är det vi. Hans mjuka och otroligt oemotståndliga läppar emot mina egna. Vår Kyss. Vi sjunker in i den. Vi skrattar och borttas i sängen tills alla våra plagg försvinner in i röran vi skapar. Nu känner jag honom ännu mer än förr. Vår lek upphör och en stilla sekund uppstår. Allt blir på allvar. Sen kysser han mig. Långsamt. Igen och igen.
Jag släpper alla mina tankar, sen försvinner jag i honom. Han försvinner i mig. Jag kan känna honom i hela min kropp. Inuti. Allt är underbart. Och nu är vi förlorade i varandra.
Realised when I woke up, on the 1st of January 2017, that I only had two pictures on my phone from this so called spectacular event. Shocking. One of the pictures was of a man wearing a black cap, literally spinning his records as he was dancing by himself behind the dirty glasses and broken bottles inside of Bar Story. Before that picture was taken we had already managed to go through most of the mandatory new years celebratory scenarios. The stress of not knowing where to spend the evening and then, last minute, actually finding a place to go (because everything always works out at the end, right?), the glass of prosecco and the toast held by far too drunk people, the countdown, the kiss, the ugly snapchat videos. Proudly made it all the way.
The other picture was of Delphine, smoking a cigarette outside Peckham Springs whilst giving me her best you're so annoying-eyes. I get those a lot. Right after this second photograph was taken and there were no more Marlboro's to keep our fingers warm, we ran into the claustrophobic, smoke-filled and extremely crowded room a bit further away. People were dancing, kissing and regretting most of their life choices. What a romantic evening. As it should be.
Looking back I think had a good night. What I remember was good. What I don't remember was probably better. & with that being said, happy new year everyone.
So today it's Friday and I have got some great news to share with you all! Yesterday I went to a interview for a retail position at James Perse in Mayfair. I stayed and talked for a bit and at the end of the meeting I had completely fallen in love with the place. High cealing, white walls, clean, fresh and extremely organised (basically the complete opposite of where I used to work). Such a cute little space. Luckily for me, I just received an email saying that the full time position is mine if I want it. How great is that?! I'll have my first shift next week and I am honestly so excited I think I might burst into tears any second now.
The store on Dover Street, where I will be located most of the time, sells casual luxury wear (= basic pieces that are very expensive) and everything just looks so nice and comfy. Which means that I get to spend my days at work wearing a plain t-shirt and cashmere pyjamas pants. WHAT A DREAM. I agree, it might not be the most exciting outfit but compared to being forced to run around in heals and skinny jeans all day long - this is a absolutely perfect senario for me. Professionally lazy-looking.
What a great way to start 2017! I have such a good feeling about this and I just love the atmosphere right now. Everyone is sick of Christmas and wants to move on. No one has started breaking their New Years resolutions yet and we all still have this "all my dreams are gonna come true this year" spirit. Wonderful. I am just so excited.
Woke up early and went to the Picturehouse Central Café today for my morning brew. A slow 8am coffee really does taste better than what's in that massive takeaway cup I'm used to running around with. Who would have thought?
Look at all these decorations! The Christmas feeling is still going strong all over central London and I have to admit that I am 100% loving it. Since I had to spend Christmas day here in London (all by myself) it now feels like I only got half a holiday this year. Good thing this city keeps it going for a bit longer. Thank you ldn.
Stayed inside the warm café for longer than I should have. Photographed my tiny soy latte (about 200 times) and the decorative surroundings (a bit less). People started to stare and then I took some more pics. Same as always.
Met up with Thomas in Covent Garden and walked up and down the crowded streets for hours. We bought more coffee and had a quick (and slightly awkward) iPhone photo-shoot on Dover Street.
And one in Hyde Park.
Ran off to a quick job interview and when the meeting was over, out of pure stress and anxiousness, I bought myself yet another hot latte to calm my nerves. Clearly I don't understand the concept of caffeine. Went home and decided to spend the night in bed. flipped through the best scenes of Woman In Black on Netflix until I fell asleep. All done.
& tomorrow my baby's coming home <3
Saint Tilda. Stealing Mikaels sweaters when I get bored of my own. Spending all morning taking selfies when the sun hits my face then posts them on social media as soon as the time is right. Feeling very fresh. Lucky me.
Now I'm in bed watching old episodes of Girls. Craving coffee but don't have the energy to go downstairs and make some. I'm too busy writing stories that are never gonna be published, looking for jobs I will never apply for & fantasising about moments that will never happen. At least not now. At least not yet. I think I just need to sit down, gather my thoughts and make something happen. Stop talking about not doing anything and actually make an effort to change. Hm. I guess I'll do that tomorrow. Today I wanna keep being lazy.