So I've been out for a while, but thats because I didn't have a computer. I'm not going to promise I'm gonna write more often, because I know I can't keep that promise. I have a hola lot going on and I don't even know where to start.
As I said my cousin was here for the summer. 2 weeks. And than me and her family went to Italy, wich was AMAZING! Can't discribe. SOOO HOT! wow. for 12-13 days. After that we took our car and drove down to Hungary so I could meet my mothers side of the family again. for 1 week. Wich so great as well. You have no clue how much I missed my grandma. The only person I can say that I love and loves me for exactly who I am. and even more. so that was great. and when I got back to sweden and spent, i think, 3 days here we took a 30 hours bus, straight to france with our church group. We really needed that. Can't describe how it is to meet 6000 people all in one place. I got some great friends from there, and it's really incredible. for 10 days. When we came back from that 30 hour bus drive back to sweden we we're gonna stay in gothenburg and fly to America the next morning. But ofc. there just had to be some drama. This has been by far the worst fight I and my brother had ever have with my mother.
Awful.... I don't think I have ever dipised anyone this much. I have never really felt like we have a mother daughter realationship but I didn't think it was this bad. I haven't hugged her in what 3 years (except her birthday) I haven't said I love you to her in 5 years??.. And I don't hate her. It just never came natural for me to do or say those things to her. maybe because all that shit we've been through. And this is not a tipical teenage thing. A phase that every teenager goes through. when they can't stand they'r parents and then later regret it. I have never felt close to her. That I can say stuff to her.
Don't get me wrong. I will forever be thankful/grateful for everything she has done for us.
My brother asked her to go home and calm down so we all could talk about this when we came back from America and have calmed down. So that we can repair ou relationship. Because it is broken. She said there is no relationship to repair. That she doesn't care anymore....
But the things she said I will never forget. She cut herself out of our lives forever. You just don't say that to you children. I just coulden't stop crying. And haven't cried in what.... 4 years?
You don't do that your child. You should be building your childrin up. Not tearing them down. And then act all innocent and get your boyfriend to come yell at us. I don't want to get in to detail but, do you know what he said to us? He told us that he regretted everything he has ever done for us, and that if I don't qapologize to her that we shouldn't come back from America.
Now who the fuck is he to say that. He has absolutly nothing to do with this fight.
There is more but I don't want to get into it. Horrible day.
I will move out as soon as possible, because I can't stand looking at them. It will never be the same. Or if I can't get a job then I will call SOS sooner or later.
But hey did I mention that I will be 16 in 1 hour.