In the trying times of writing a finance thesis, the analogies between financial investors and oneself really start to arise. Not only are we all essentially profit-maximizers, trying to get the most out of every situation and relationships.
Remember that time you felt like your job really wasn't GIVING you anything in terms of experience and happiness? You just want to feel like you're learning and developing all the time. In addition to receiving a descent salary that will finance your current skim latte obsession, of course.
What about your ex? He wasn't treating you like the Beyonce you are? He didn't even bring home flowers that Friday when he ended up working 2 hours overtime even though you had been slaying away in the kitchen for 3 hours for that date-night?
If a situation or relationship isn't meeting our expectations and we feel that we aren't receiving any bang for our buck, we tend to change the terms of it. A.k.a.: break up with the guy, quit our sucky job, or toss that lost friendship in the trash.
When it comes to dating, it seems that increasingly more people aren't really that worried about sentiment anymore. They want a quick risk-return reward without committing to a long-term investment. In my experience, those long-term diversified portfolios tend to bring higher rewards if one is willing to put in some effort.
If you find that your right thumb getting a significantly better workout than your left, and that you are Ubering home at 2 a.m. most weekends after having 4 or 5 or 6 rounds of drinks with your new potential day-trade, you're exactly what I'm talking about. And don't worry, you're not alone. The number of independent day-traders within millennial dating has exponentially increased and it seems that it's gonna stay that way.
The pressure on the job market to have a top-notch education, superior references, work experience and one-of-a-kind internships and extracurriculars to make you stand out really leaves most people with very little time to make any long-term investments. The best way to maximise profits and utility without anyone getting hurt is just casual dating. For women with biological clocks, this goes against 96.72% (Insert non-existing reference here) of our imbedded biological traits, which is why this culture is the reason we walk around with constant under eye circles.
It's also the reason why most dates we go on leave us disappointed. As we learn with experience, most stocks look great on paper - we usually only see the positive press releases that promise a high dividend payout and future growth in the short- and long-run. As the rational boss lady investors we are, though, we probably should get to the bottom of what's really going on here.
Is your time really worth investing?
Are you willing to give valuable time to such a risky asset?
Are the losses going to be substantial if the asset crashes and you lose your entire investment?
If your answer is yes to 1 or more of the above, don't buy into any of the millennial dating bullshit. I promise you that there still exists those that are willing to give you time and respect before expecting their payoff. That's not love in any way - that's just a profit-maximising investor who's more worried about their stats than a portfolio for the long-run.