I never feel, give sympathy or care. And ones I did all that, #downhill for me. I am tired of being the better one. The one doing right and the one getting hurt. I am tired of getting confused, double signals and complications. I am so tired of people that don't know what they want, and because of that they are making their lives more complicated and the consequences spreads to others than they selfs. I am the one taking them, feeling hurt and left alone. I have been confused about my feelings, what to call them or how to handle them. I had this fantasy of getting into a relationship like in those movies but still not that corny. But still, I was honest the whole way. Told what I thought and felt. I didn't do anything wrong and here I am. So do I need to be an asshole to survive? Do I need to play a game? Honesty should be a priority, the thing getting people and all relationships far. He lied to her, he lied to me and he will lie again. I just wanted something mature.
So I am back at my feet, feels like it at least. Downloaded the tinder app and cleaned my room. I guess it is a sign of moving on, from whatever it was. I am grateful for my wonderful and supportive friends that i have, and I am grateful for me being honest and mature. I am grateful for me being brave and not having a limited mindset because of fear. Thank God. Pain is meant to be felt.
To the Subject; I don't know how to label my feelings for you. I felt compassion, friendship and competence with you. I want you to regret your decision as I regret my strong expressions.
This is deep af. Love, Silja