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T H O U G H T S 

Dear reader, how is life?

"A woman is more dangerous than a loaded pistol."

Feminism. Being a feminist. Calling your self as a feminist. We woman has been fighting for our equality for years, and we have achieved much by doing that. I do not call myself as a feminist, but I do agree a lot when it comes to the ideal thoughts of feminism and the movement. Equality between woman and men, no matter the subject/work/relationship/economics. The part I use of feminism is something that bothers me the most, and it is we women and men who is causing it. Sleeping around. As a woman it is wrong of me to sleep around. I am a slut, a whore, disrespectful and I am dirty. A man, he is a king. A man sleeping around is respected, good being, qualified and get's a clap on the shoulder. You are so good man.

I got a dating app few weeks ago, and started to talk with men. Men who are soldiers, ambitious students, personal trainers, work ethics and travelers. I talked with all of them at the same time, met them and had sex with them. Wonderful sex. Still, nobody expect my friends knew about it. My mother knew too, and she is the reason I wright about this. She told me that meeting up man nr1 on Friday, and meeting up man nr2 on Saturday was way to wrong. I was qualified as a slut, and i didn't show any respect towards myself. Now, i know it's risky of me writhing about this but I need to share my thoughts. I play like a man. I use protection and I enjoy. I do not tell anyone and I do not share anything, (still, expect my closest friends.) I play clean. I know men who sleeps around, dirty way, uses woman for their pleasure and talks about it to everyone he knows. And it is accepting. I will stop caring about everyones opinions. If I am attracted to a man, and wants to sleep with him, then I will with protection, respects and love. You can call me a FuckWoman, a female version of a FuckBoy.


Love, Silja

​Me and my friend enjoying the Old Town in Stockholm. 

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T H O U G H T S 

Why do I judge other persons for their decisions and lifestyle?

You know, when I see these people who are very poor or assume that they are by looking at their behavior and appearance. When I look at them, they seem so careless. They know who they are and sure lives very poorly and our parents has always said that we need to thank God because we have it better. And I don't know, I had a period when I didn't use a phone for 6 moths and honestly, of course the first two weeks was horrible cause I thought that I was going to die but slowly I adjusted after my "new lifestyle" and I didn't feel that I needed my phone (the need). To not have a phone takes away a lot of privileges but still I kept mailing through my computer to handle business/work etc, and it worked. To have your thoughts on your Instagram picture, Facebook post or latest gossip tweets is painful. My life goes around that Justin Bieber deleted his Instagram account, and that is THE BIGGEST NEWS EVER LIKE OMG!!** I surround my life around everybody else's. To get the best Instagram picture I need the perfect drink, the perfect sunglasses, the perfect background bla bla bla. All this effort on making someone else satisfied. It feels like we are following this image how we are supposed to live our lives. Those poor men 'n women doesn't have that in mind. There is of course pros and cons with being poor but I won't convince myself that my life is easier because all wealth and privileges I have. Not having much money limits your assets and, you live simple af. I just hope that everyone could think a bit bigger and healthier. To live simple maybe isn't a bad thing. Maybe you would be happier? Of course it's harder than it looks, to adjust after another lifestyle, but just think about it. Our society is built on money and we are convinced on a lot of bullshit that our prime ministers are saying and promising. Now it got a bit overhanded but I get very frustrated on the image we all should follow.

This post is one of those "Think bigger" or "Why?" and I just wright everything that comes in mind. And of course I am not a better person and I use those privileges that we have, but it's just an eye-opener.


Question everything. Love, Silja

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T R A V E L

Oh hello reader,

Do you prefer to drink cocktails by the beach or drink cava at an outdoor cafe? Well I prefer both thank you. This year has been a travel year for me and it's not over yet! I have visited both beaches and famous capitals. The adventures Thailand and it's beautiful coconut palm tree beaches were you can live a very bohemic lifestyle. I love Thailand, iv'e been there three times now and still loving it. One of the islands I recommend is Koh Samui & Koh Samet. In Koh Samui there is the full moon party that i have not experienced but it is DEFINITELY something I want to experience. Thailand is very cheap compare with example, Sweden. And you can go on all your dream adventures. The other city I visited in the spring was Barcelona. Oh Barcelona. Such a remarkable city! Unlucky I was there for only 48 hours but I had a great time. La Rambla, the famous street. It's full of street artists, food, shops, cafes & restaurants. I need to point out that (everyone) smelled so good, like really good! Barcelona has a beach that I didn't know about. On our way to the beach we walked besides a boat berth and ate fresh fruits and drank cold ice water. By the beach in Barcelona we drank drinks with a little bit more spice in it. I recommend Aperol Spritz (picture down below), you can order it everywhere but do enjoy it by the sea where the sun shines the most. Here in Sweden you can't expect a "summer breeze" but if you travel three hours down south and there'll you find 30 degrees hot hot hot Barcelona.

It depends where you live, but if you live somewhere in Europe I would recommend to visit Greece & Spain. And If you want to be a little bit more adventures of your self then give Thailand & New York City a chance. New York is a expensive living with style, fashion and amazing nyc people. New York City is for them who wants to feel like a "small town girl" in the big city.


Well i hope some of you got some inspiration for some vacation. Of course all of these places iv'e mentioned is meant for spring/summer times when the cities are blooming.

Love, Silja


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F A S H I O N

Am I the only one who is always too early with putting on the sunglasses in the beginning of the spring when there is still snow piles outside? Or bringing my lovely coat to work in the very beginning of fall? I am always the first one with dressing after summer when it's 10 degrees outside and totally wearing autumn coats in early August in 20 degrees. Today I had to work from 10am and it was 16 degrees outside so I, of course, got very exited cause I could finally wear my new fall coat!! And no shame here! Of course everybody is looking at me like I would be crazy, but hey I have a lovely new coat on and totally wearing it.

Beginning of February I bout a pare of new sunglasses and I got exited over them so I wore them even if it was snowing, but NO it's forbidden here in Sweden. Everybody asked me why the hell I am wearing sunglasses when it's February??!! Such a crazy person. I could ask you the same, why are you wearing the exact same clothes every single day? I am tired of all these fashion rules. Or more like, I am tired that whatever I wear is wrong. Everything is just wrong. To love doing your makeup for example, and you like to go all crazy with the colors is wrong if it's on a Wednesday, that kind of shit is for weekends or pride festivals. You can't wear heels on a normal day, those is for party's. Dark red lips is not the right shade for Summer, that's a fall shade. Not too much cleavage cause then you are a slut. And showing nothing at all, well then you are a geek or you are a no lifer. Sometimes I get anxious because my style is wrong, wrong, wrong. Even wearing a hat is a big step. So go out there and feel no shame! If blue eyeshadow is totally your thing then go with it.

​Check out some really amazing and talented instagramers; @connorfranta, @stillvika, @ownthelight

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T H O U G H T S 

Dear reader,

I know that I am not the only one when it gets to this. This post is all about the bond & relationship between mothers 'n daughters. I my self is a daughter to a mother who grew up in the late 70s with grannies old ways of parenting. My mother was quite young when she got me and thats both amazing and not so amazing. Every time I tell somebody how old my mother is they all react the same, "Oh, so young!" or "Cool" and I can understand why everybody reacts 99% of the time positive. Me and my mother are not so far from each other when it comes to self development. Weeks ago we chatted about boy problems over some wine and we kind off find our selfs in the same problems. And in those moments our friendship is strong and highly loved. We can always talk about everything, and i mean EVERYTHING. And that i am fully thankful for. But these things and the "friendship bond" can lead us in trouble and misunderstanding. Which it has, several times. Me and my mother thinks that we own the world and everything we say or believe is right. Every corner of our house needs to bee in our way. And that is there we collide/collapse. I am rude, not showing respect or empathy and I always hear how egoistic I can bee. And I argue back with my hundreds of argument that she is too much emotions all the time and such a hopeless romantic etc etc. We nag 'n nag. Me growing up to an adult and she dealing with it is maybe not the best part of her motherhood but I guess it is the same for every mother with a young adult. But i am not perfect either. I see things from an other perspective than mother does and thats maybe the biggest issue. She can't handle it. She wants too teach me things but I always argue or comment on things, (and sorry mama, I always will.) Me and my beloved mother hasn't find our balance in our relationship yet and I know that there is many of you who can relate. We can't yet accept each other for those faults but someday that day will come. But I won't stop loving her and she will always be in my "first to call" list.

Love, SIlja

​Me and my bby enjoying the absolute amazing summer weather in Stockholm. Remember to enjoy the summer!

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T H O U G H T S 

Dear reader,

Are you having a good day? Mine has been tense. Typical Wednesday. Middle of the week and feeling that life is going nowhere. I woke up early afternoon and stressed my way to the shower, shoved some food in me and ran off to work. So I actually work at Mc'donalds, maybe not the best but it's perfect for the CV and as a "side job." I worked and was busy all evening. From no where comes this guy I know and I know him from (not the best contacts exactly.) And how I know him? well i'll explain shortly.

A year ago, I was at a party at my friends place with other people i knew. I came with a date but I lost him quick and chatted with my friends most of the evening. A lot happened at that party. So, the friend who held the party made some "sensual contact" with me and I know that I came with a date but he was way to lost... if you know what I mean. So I and the guy did something privet, you know. And it was nothing wrong with it. Later the guys best friend came up to me which i'v met before. I felt a little bit uncomfortable around him cause he looked at me and smiled, like creepy smiled. I knew what he wanted, and I knew that I didn't want that. So I turned him down twice. But he nagged 'n nagged. And everyone was wasted and I started to get drunk as well. And when you are drunk, as everybody who drinks knows about, that you loos control of your self and your body when you are drunk. I honestly don't remember how I got upstairs but I was with him and he dragged me into the toilet. Just writhing about it makes me wanting it (go away.) Anyway. He dragged me into the toilet but I said it was wrong and that he was my friends (the guy who held the party) best friend. I pushed him away more times than I can remember. But he kept saying it was okey over and over and started to kiss me and I of course pushed him away SO MANY TIMES. And he just kept on. In some point you kind of wind up in chock. Just let it happen. Keep saying to your self that it will be over soon and it gets better. It's getting better Silja, it's getting better Silja, it's getting better Silja. And I stayed in a chock. I pushed it away this, what could I call it? an event? a memory? for quite a while. I hided it for my mother cause she would wind up in a chock as well, and I felt uncomfortable for a long time. Not like in my own body but I didn't have the energy to communicate with people. And just tried to work it out. I am a person who wants to work out things, not hide it for my self. So It has been a year now since that happened. And my mother knows about it of course and I am very well and aren't bothered about it anymore. I'v worked it out. But he came to my work today with his friends. I was cleaning and looked terrible. Of course you want to look absolute amazing when a Le idiot walks by. But no, I looked my worst. He calls me by my name and a huge stone landed somewhere in me. And I don't know why I a being so nice to him, really? I am not a nice person to people who've hurt me but with him I am casual nice to him. And i don't know why?! I ran off to the dressing room and cried cause I panicked and got angry. I stayed there for about 20 mins until we closed. And my mood got up again when I got home. I have no idea why he appeared at my work today. Like the Mc'donalds i work at is the tiniest ever and hided away. But he has an negative effect on me that I am working at but I am not dramatized. I want to share this story cause it can happen anywhere anytime. I mean, this was at my friends private party, and it was his best friend. And my friend actually approved me that it was okey, it all was okey with him that I was with his friend. So everyone was telling me that it was okey when I felt it wasn't.

My message with this is,

be careful, trust your self with your own decision. Do decisions by your own morals. If that makes any sense..? Don't be too naive. We humans (what I believe) are capable to do bad thins as good things. A quote that I use often is "Everyone you know is going to hurt or disappoint you sometime, but you can chose who you wan't to get hurt by, and who is worth getting hurt for."


Love, Silja

This was a very nice evening with my lovely friends in some corner of Stockholm. (capture the moment)

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Dear reader,

Well hello, who am I? No f idea... no but, this is a introduction any way. I am the twisted person you'll ever know. A twisted person with a simple taste with a little twist. Everything in my life is a little bit (twisted.) But, you need to know, I love tea, fashion, food, culture, philosophy, (people with opinions) & exotic music. In this blog i'll wright about my thoughts and things I am passionated about. From food to fashion & everything else.

As I wright, i'll recommend you to enjoy your moment while, example drinking your coffee in the morning.

Love, Silja

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