The Saturday Morning Journal
The Saturday morning journal is an invitation for you to attend the world's oldest therapy technique, it is completely free and it starts today. The task is to write a diary in which you answer philosophical or personal question, once a week. You will also be able to read my diary entry (slightly edited to protect the people around me). To learn more about what The Saturday Morning journal is, scroll to the bottom of the text, where I have written a little about the process.
Today's question: Who am I?
I am me, I've always been me. Meanwhile, when I look back on my life, it may seem as if I have been many different "me"s, in my life. I was a different person when I was little, than I was as a teenager. I was another before I had children than whan I was after, and now that I am a woman in midlife, I'm a completely different person once again. So who am I then? In a body and a world constantly changing. Do I really know myself? And can I trust myself? I am constant, or am I changing? How do I know who I am??
Getting to know myself, is really a lifelong project, because I constantly progress. My interests change, my desires, dreams, goals, and also my beliefs and values, not to mention that I grow and become smarter and wiser every day. So knowing who I am, is quite a puzzle.
Physically, of course it is easy to explain who I am. My name is Sicily Hunwick, I am married, I have three children, a dog and a mountain cabin, and my biggest passion is downhill skiing, also I am more than average engaged in politics, the environment and global wellbeing (though I can not stand to watch/read the news :), I like yoga, I love books, and do not like to watch tv (although I am crazy about a good movie and Vampire Diaries).
But all of that says little about who I really am, on the inside. And that is what is really interesting.
On the inside I can often feel small, afraid, puzzled and I feel alone, often. Other days, I am strong, brave, fast and solution-oriented and very social, most of the time.
I suppose I am the result of everything I have experienced in life, the good and the bad. And here, in the middle of life, I find myself looking back. For whom I was when I was little. The original me. The one I was before life began teaching me all the lessons. The curious child, the explorer, the open mind, the happy soul, the safe feeling of loving myself unconditionally. That's me, that's the one I miss, and the one I'm looking for, I wish I knew exactly when I lost her... I want to be her, my essence, the one I was ment to be. I know her very well, I know who she is and where she is headed. I trust her, because I know she's real, she has not been influenced by life yet. She has the child's courage and is blissfully naive, but she's also defiant and cries out when needed. And she is very loving, kind and honest, to herself and to others. And I wonder if it is possible? Can I find her again, can I be her again? Can I make her safe, take care of her and say: "You made it, I will be taking good care of you from now on." I believe that it is possible. I know it's possible. And that's what I want.
So here I am, at the age where gravity is starting to steal my face, wise of damage and rich from experience, thinking I want to go back, I want to find the wonderful girl I was before life started happening, it is her I want to recall, her I want to be, for as long as I live. She is me, my true self, she is the one I want to take care of, and she is the one I am proud of. Thats me. My source, my vibrance, my true self.
I want to take time starting today, to find my essence, to return to my purpose, and to take care of myself in every choice I make. I will bring my essence back to life, into my meditations, my actions, my choices and my daily life. That is my Saturday Morning Journal. Being my essence. I can feel it awakening inside, and I will nurture it and help myself flourish. I am quite exited really.
Are you? Do you feel inspired? Are you ready? Do you have the answer to the very simple, but oh so large question:
Who are you?
The Saturday Morning journal is an invitation for you to lift your own everyday life through to understanding yourself better, gain insights into your innermost thoughts and processes and to articulate who you are and what kind of life you really want. Every Saturday morning I will ask you a question as an invitation for you to you to answer todays question in the diary of your choice. Writing a diary is almost forgotten as a therapeutic technique, because today we have so many useful therapies. But the value in having a close, honest conversation with yourself, is so high. You will understand yourself better and live more and more in touch with your essence as you follow The Saturday Morning Journal. Every Saturday I will post a question as an invitation for you to set aside time during the weekend to write the answer in your own personal diary, whether it's a physical, beautiful book, or a note feature on your phone / tablet / pc. The important and therapeutic value is that you set aside some time every weekend for reflection and contemplation, your quiet time, perhaps with a good cup of tea and a pet like in the picture, out in nature or another of your favorite spots. You'll be surprised what thoughts and answers that come to you when you start writing. Are you entering The Saturday Morning Journal a long time after it started? No worries, go to the folder in the blog called The Saturday Morning Journal, and you will find all the questions there in chronological order, so you can start at the beginning and work your way forward at your own pace. As you work on your journal you will also find that the questions posed stay with you the coming week. And little by little, you will find that you open yourself more, become more harmonious, more honest with yourself and others and live more in line with your purpose and who you really are, inside. Writing a journal may feel strange at first, maybe it is a long time ago that you wrote an entire text by hand and maybe it's strange having to put down on paper your innermost thoughts. Stay in the process anyway, journaling is the oldest therapy technique in the world (except from girl talk off course), it's free and it works, not to mention, you get to have control of your process and move at the pace that suits you. I hope you will join in on the adventure The Saturday Morning Journal offers you to join. Although I will share my own journal as best I can, I do need to edit a bit to protect my loved ones, but you, in your journal will do well in not editing at all, but rather be more honest than you have ever been. Are you afraid to write down something others can not find? I had a client once who established a hotmail address to keep a journal in. It had a separate password and she logged into it whenever she had something to write, she then sent e-mails to herself to the mailbox she was writing from. that way, she saved all emails in chronological order in her inbox and only she had access to it. I hope of course that you have people around you who respect your privacy, so that you are comfortable with writing by hand in a beautiful book, but if that's not the case, do not let that stop you, find another way. I hope you're tempted to join and that The Saturday Morning Journal will move your life, remember: You can do whatever you want, when you put your mind to it :) Good luck :)