You think that I am happy - only because there are so many emotions that I choose not to show.

Sometimes I do wonder if that is like lying but in colour light white. Or is it like any other lie. A lie.

A part of me wants to lie to avoid consequences , avoid talking. But above all , not to see you sad and not show my naked tears. They are just salty and ugly. You would not like them anyway.

But pain changes people. Pain demands to be felt. Pain is just as a mother who wants you to talk with them in bad situations. They never let go unless you give yourself up and talk. Pain.