There are so many things to talk about when it comes to this festival.

Like this Happy Kanye jumping castle.

The stages, and the crowds.

The glitter and the outfits.

The acts.

The music.

The people.

This person in particular, who made this all happen.

The new and the old friendships.

The heat & the cold, and the miserable yet wonderful way of living.

The rivalry.

And the Fun.

Regardless of all these topics and everything there is to mention, there's no way to relate to the Splendour experience for one that has not yet been there, and there's no way to explain Splendour in a way that makes it justice.

It's not just the music.

It's

The heat, the cold, the music, the people, the lack of sleep, the Nutella for brekkie lunch and dinner, the misery, the bliss...


....Combine these things, and that's when you get Splendour in the Grass 2017.


โœจ



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Part 2: traveling with the NZ navy

How did this happen?

The story begins here 👆 in the jacuzzi at this hostel in the small town Rotorura (pronounced Rtrrrr).

As this little town is powered by thermal activity it stinks pretty bad of sulfur (aka egg fart). Though, free hot water means that every hostel has a hot outdoor jacuzzi which is pretty sweet when it's only 8°C outside.

It was in this very jacuzzi that I met these two wonderful human beings 👇

Anna and Lee are the kind of people that you meet and then 5 minutes later you feel like you've known them your whole life, so it wasn't long before we found ourselves traveling together.

Before we left Rotorua we checked out these natural hot springs in the middle of the forest. It was unreal to be walking on this chilly forest trail and then stumple upon this wonderful steamy river with people sitting in it.

The next stop was Wai o Tapu, a thermal park reserve that is the home of the Lady Know Geyser.

The geyser is erupting naturally every 72 hours or so, but the eruption can be triggered by adding soap into the opening of the geyser which breaks the surface causing it to spit boiling water 20 metres above the ground.

Wai o Tapu is much more than just a geyser though, it's a huge reserve with fields of bubbling water and sulfur-spitting pits. A slightly overpriced (35$) pass let us explore the thermal grounds on a 75 minute walk.

The large orange-framed pool below is the Champange pool. Parts of it are organge, pink, peach, but most of it looks like sparking champange 🍾

It's pretty interesting to see that you're actually walking below the water level at one point, as the pool has slowly layerd itself further off the ground.

Another interesting thing was this "Mountain Dew" pool that is called "Devil's bath". I have no idea what caused this fluorescent green colour but I'm sure it nothing healthy!

By the end of that day we found ourselves in this little lake touwn Taupo, and this is were things started to get really interesting.

We were all pretty tired after having dinner at a cute restaurant by the lake, but decided to meet up with Lee's Scottish hostel-mates at a bar for a beer before heading back home.

Apart from the scottish guys, we also happened to meet part of the New Zealand Navy. ⛵⛴

These guys👆

Apparently they were on a "get toghether" trip funded by the NZ Navy to get closer as a team while working at sea. Their trip was originally booked for about 30 people, but only about half of them ended up going.

...Which is why: The NZ navy had 15 spare spots for anyone who was keen to join them on their trip. Best of all, everything was already paid for so it was all for free and luckily me, Anna and Lee were ready to come along.

The next morning we found ourselves squeezed in to these flattering wetsuits and ready to hop on a rubber boat and paddle down a river.

This wasn't a calm and quiet little paddling tour though, this was winter white water rafting, and it was intense!

"FORWARD, BACK PADDLE, LEFT OVER, RIGHT BACK, GO GO GO, GET DOOOOOOWN!!"

We spent two hours following our guide's constant commands while washing down the river rapids, sometimes finding ourselves completely under water and other times almost flipping the boat.

Even though the water was freezing; it was long ago that I had that much fun. 🌊

04.45am the next morning, I woke up to the most challenging and incredible day ever. I was about to do something I've never done before:

I was going to climb to the summit of a 1800+ metre mountain, with the navy, in winter, under such extreme conditions that the mountain was closed to ordinary visitors.

We started at the bottom of mount Doom (another LOTR reference), where there was no snow but yet a thin layer of ice on top of the puddles and an ice cold wind. We were provided with clothes, boots, crampons, ice axes(!) and backpacks in which we stored our lunch.

We were up for an 8 hour climb.

The first hour was called "the warm up", and I must admit I was a bit nervous as I was already huffing and puffing. I realised it wasnt going to get easier when all of a sudden the path disappeared and was replaced with endless, steep stairs. In front of us we had "The Devil's Staircase". Great.

Even though the air was getting colder with each step I just got sweatier. But even though the stairs were tough, the view was worth it 👆

We still had hours of uphill climbing coming up, but it wasn't that bad as my body seemed to get used to the higher heart rate and the constant walking after a while and stopped telling me I was dying.

The snow got deeper for each metre we climbed. As we reached about 1600 metres the wind really picked up as well and we stopped to attach the crampons to our boots.

After a tough, steep, windy and cold climb we finally reached the summit of mount Tongariro! We stayed at the top just long enough to take a photo but then the wind got too strong so we had to find shelter.

Conveniently, a stream of hot steam puffed out just below the summit on the other side of the peak, melting all snow and creating a crevice in the mountain where we could sit and enjoy our lunch, away from the wind and with warm ground beneith our butts.

This was the first time I had a sandwich on an altitude of 1800+ metres.

After reaching the summit we still had 4 hours of hiking ahead of us, and we couldn't stop for very long. The wind was picking up and the last thing we wanted was to get caught in a blizzard up there. As we climbed down the steep side of the summit the sky cleared though, and the massive crater making out the top of Tongariro was revealed (see picture above).

As you might have figured out, Mount Tongariro is actually a volcano. An active such as well, with steam puffing out every here and there and with fresh water lakes that never freeze on top of it. The main crater on top of the volcano is huge, givig the mountain a flat top. The summit of the mountain is simply just the edge of the crater.

A couple of hundred years ago, the top of the volcano exploded in a massive eruption, blowing up the ground to such an extent it created three additional craters, which are all beautiful clear lakes today.

It was strange to stand by these still lakes in -15°C, a view I will never forget.

The way down was 10 very long kilometers. You'd think that walking downhill would be easier than walking uphill and yes, it definitely was easier, but alfter a while the high pace resulted in painful blisters and aching knees.

It was spectacular to see the snow covered path turn into grass that turned into bush land and then eventually became forest before we reached the bottom. You could also see scorched trees from the latest eruption about 10(?) years ago and the paths where lava had flown and were the forest had still not recovered.

I took no more pictues on the way down as my whole body was aching and was therfore only capable of bringing me to that bus down at the bottom.

And what a victory it was to finally arrive at that bus! Sunshine, comfortable seats and best of all: cold beers awaited us when we finally completed our trek, 8 hours after we started!

...Back at the hotel I didn't end up having a hot bath as the bathtub was.. slightly occupied.. but well a long hot shower!

Somehow we stayed up drinking until 4.30am that same night (I have no idea where that energy came from) which made it a real pain to get up and check out the next morning.

After waving goodbye to the Navy squad, me and Anna went on one last adventure to the Huka Falls, and then it was time for us to say goodbye as well. 💔

I drove back to Auckland the same day, returned my car and passed out at a hostel. I slept 14 hours that night and woke up just  to catch my flight back home to Brisbane.

Even though New Zealand was a wonderland and I didn't want to leave, nothing could beat the feeling of running into Alex's arms as he was waiting for me at the airport. ❤ One month apart has been way too long.

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Part one: traveling alone

Never in my life have I had such a positive surprise.

I've always wanted to go to New Zealand, I wanted to see the mountains and the kiwi birds and the land of LOTR..

..but I never expected it to be such a great adventure as it has been! New Zealand makes Australia look tame and is really an underestimated travel destination.

My journey started here โ˜ in Auckland city (after running to my train and almost missing my flight from the Gold Coast...).

As I knew that I wouldn't have much time in NZ (only 9 days in total) I actually arranged to meet up with a girl on my first night in Auckland to get some advise regarding what to see and do in NZ.

Though, as we had a burger and a beer downtown together, I realised I probably knew more than her about Auckland already and spent the rest of the night acting like a mum as it seemed she had never left her apartment before in her life (or maybe she was a 14-year old with a fake ID). ๐Ÿ˜

So after talking to myself and guiding myself around the city (with the girl walking in silence next to me) it was time for me to order an Uber for her as she had no idea how to get home and then finally time to sleep.

The next morning I checked out and went to pick up a rental car, just to be reminded I had forgotten my international driver's license in Brissy... 59$ later I had a new license and finally also a car.

Due to waiting for the new license to be made I left Auckland way later than I expected to do, and arrived at my destination in Coromandel just before sunset. Nontheless, I was determined to see the Cathedral Cove as planned anyway so I parked my car and ran up and down the 45 minute scenic track to the rocks and made it just in time.๐Ÿ‘Œ

The Cathedral cove was stunning even though clouds were gathering in the sky above. You could stand on a small sand dune under the cove while big waves crashed into the rock and made a loud thunderlike noice. To get in and out of the cove you had to run as the waves pulled back for a second.

As I turned around to walk back my phone died and rain started to pour down as the sun was setting behind the clouds. So again; I ran, and arrived at my car soaked in water.

As my phone came back to life after charging for a while in the car I came to realise all the hostels in Coromandel were fully booked already, and that the closest hostel was in Hamilton, 3 hours away on the other side of a huge mountain range.

So I started driving.

And to entertain myself I sang loudly to all my favourite tunes and shouted every time lightning struck across the sky.

As I woke up the next day I learned that Hamilton is basically.. well... a sh*t hole. But they have a really nice garden. And apparently also, a peacock.

The gardens seemed endless and I felt a bit like Alice in Wonderland while walking through this maze.

After an hour I managed to find a way out, and it was just about time to leave as I had another adventure booked in for this day:

Hobbiton. โค

The only way to do Hobbiton (for everyone out there who lives in a box, Hobbiton is where they shot Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit) is to do some sort of tour. The tours are quite pricey (79$) but you get good value for money as the guides are super nerdy an passionate about all the details of the movie set.

Apparently Hobbiton has been built twice. The reason? Well, people didn't know how popular LOTR would become while shooting the first movies, and nobody expected that people would want to PAY just to see the movie set. So, they built all the Hobbit holes etc out of temporary materials the first time, just to take it all down as they stopped filming.

Already when they were filming the first movies, fans started to sneak into the area to get a glimpse of the movie set. As a response they introduced tours, but these tours were really poor as there wasn't much to show back then.

This is when they realised there was a big interest in opening the set to the public so they decided to build the set for The Hobbit with permanent materials.

Simply growing the crops and the trees for the set took several years.

All the moss and the old cracked fences are fake. They chipped the wood by hand and painted it with vinegar to make it look aged. Hand painting the moss on the Hobbit Holes and the fences took several months too.

The hobbit holes come in different sizes as they used forced perspective to make hobbits look small and elves look big in the first movies. The bigger holes where used to make Sam and Frodo look tiny while little hobbit holes made Gandalf look like a giant.

Fun fact: Remember when Gandalf hit his head in the doorway entering one of the hobbit holes? That was not according to script, but looked so funny that they decided to keep it.

It was one man's full time job to walk a pattern evey day to create the perfect little paths you see from a birds perspective in the movies.

Remember when Bilbo is running down these paths in the beginning of The Hobbit? He spent hours running up and down these paths in clumsy fake hobbit feet just for a couple of seconds of material. As the paths are not too long you actually see him running down the same path from different angles, as well as teleporting from one part of the set to another.

To the left in the picture above is the "party tree", you know, where they celebrated Bilbo's 111th birthday. This tree is 250 years old and was actually the main reason why P. Jackson decided to use this particular valley for the movie set.

The actors in this scene we're not all professionals and so P. Jackson wasn't pleased with their fake reactions to the fireworks in the scene (there were no real fireworks so people had to fake being surprised and amazed). On the last day of filming and the absolute last recording, he arranged for a spectacular firework show to go off, without telling anyone. So, next time you see the movie you will know those surprised reactions are not acting, they are real.

Fun fact: The people acting at the party scene weren't all LOTR fans and needed to be bribed with free beer all night to participate in the scene. Though, as the scene would take 3 days to record and P. Jackson didn't want his actors to be hungover, he made sure a beer was brewn with only 1% alcohol. Of couse without telling anyone.

Can you recognise Bag's End? ๐Ÿ‘‡
This famous Hobbit hole is Bilbo's home and placed at the very top of the hill.

On top of his home is a very spectacular tree. This tree was chopped down in another part of NZ and transported to the set for the first movies.

Though, as The Hobbit is set 60 years prior to LOTR, Sir P. Jackson thought it would be absurd if they used the same tree, so they created a perfect of that tree out of steel, just a little bit smaller.

200,000 leaves were hand wired to this tree and then hand painted as they got bleached in the sun.

Fake tree to the left ๐Ÿ‘†

We finished the tour by walking over the cute little stone bridge that you can see Gandalf and Frodo riding over in the beginning of the movie, past the beautiful water mill down to the Green Dragon pub๐Ÿบ

In difference to the hobbit holes, the Green Dragon is still fully furnished and is serving ale and pie in the wamth of the sparkling fire place which was the perfect way to round off this wonderful little tour.

As the nerd I am I played the LOTR soundtracks as I drove through The Shire on the way to my next destination Rotorua. I felt so happy I could die but little did I know what this thermal little cute town would bring me.

See New Zealand part 2 to see what Rotorua was hiding! ๐ŸŒ‹

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Isn't it strange how sometimes months and months go by with nothing going on, and how other times of the year can be so packed with fun stuff that you hardly have time to do it all?


You know how I mentioned I've got tickets to New Zeeland and Turkey in my last post? Well, those are not the only tickets I've got; this morning I managed to grab a ticket to Splendour in the Grass as well!!

The tickets to this awesome music festival have been sold out ever since they were released earlier this year, but every now and then a ticket will pop up for grabs on their resale website, due to people cancelling their purchases. If you're lucky and quick you can then grab that ticket before anyone else!

I actually set the resale webpage as my start-up page for Chrome, so that every time I opened my web browser I'd see if any tickets had shown up, and early this morning it was my turn!


I am so excited to go, I've heard so many good things about this festival and I absolutely LOVE the line up. Here are a few of my favourites that will be preforming:

* Allday *

* Amy Shark *

* Asgรฉir *

* Bag Raiders *

* Banks *

* Catfish and the Bottlemen *

* George Ezra *

* King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard *

* Mallrat *

* Peking Duk *

* Royal Blood *

* Stormzy *

* Tash Sultana *

* Thundamentals *

* Tove Lo *

* The xx *

* Vance Joy *


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I know I haven't been too frequent updating the blog lately, and to those who have been hanging in there looking for updates: thank you and I'm sorry! Not too much has been happening beside the ordinary stuff: work, food, drinks, work, food, sleep, etc. Hence the lack of updates. The days have come and gone as summer turned into fall, and now the fall has turned into winter.


And winter calls for a change.


This morning, Alex kissed me on the forehead and said bye as he usually does when he leaves in the morning. Though, this time he won't come back in a while, as he is about to enjoy three long weeks on my little party island: Bali!

On July the 5th, it's my turn to take a holiday (from my holiday ;) ), as I have spontaneously booked a return-trip to New Zealand! For nine days I'm going to check out what the kiwis are up to and hang out with my own kin in "Hobbiton" (the Lord of the rings set). It is incredibly exciting to get to travel overseas again and I can't wait to dust off my backpack and get on that flight!


I'll be back to work and normality here in Brisbane on the 13th of July, but not for too long. Unfortunately my one-year visa will come to an end in the beginning of August this year, so I've got to leave the country whether I want it or not. Luckily, the expiry of my visa lines up perfectly with Alexsandra's leave from work (Yep, Alexsandra who I travelled Indonesia with!), so we figured it would be a perfect opportunity for a reunion! ๐Ÿ‘ฏ๐Ÿ‘ฏ


One skype-call later, plans became reality as we both booked tickets for the 14th of August to: Istanbul! โœŒ Literally everyone I've told about these plans is letting me know what a bad idea it is to go Turkey in these times of terrorism and war. I just want to say THANK YOU for your concern but I am neither blind or deaf, and I do actually listen to the radio daily and get news updates on my phone and TV, and I know about the risks it brings to go to Turkey at the moment. But heck, the whole world on currently on a terrorism threat list, and if I don't go I'm letting the terrorists win, right?


At least that's how I see it.


Being very anxious about leaving Australia behind, I can't think of a better way to take that step than doing it together with her. I can totally see us enjoying days at the beach again, far away from everything else. ๐ŸŒด

Lotta, Ebba and me last night as we had a leaving party for Lotta who's also leaving Australia soon.โœˆ

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Picture stolen from https://www.keiranlusk.com.au

Once again I've waited a little bit too long to get photos before I do a blog post.. But I've finally got my hands on Alex's GoPro photos from when we took a tour to Tangalooma island and snorkeled amongst the wrecks and I can't wait to share them with you!

The tour was a birthday pressie that I got from Alex and included a full day boat tour to the sandy islands that make out the outline of Moreton Bay (the "sea" outside of Brisbane's coast). The tour also included lunch, guides, coffee and snacks, boom netting, beachtime and best of all: the opportunity to snorkel amongs the Tangalooma wrecks! Though before we could get into the water we needed to put on some protective wetsuits and gloves, which we pulled of with sass.๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ‘†

Before we got to have a look at the wrecks we got the opportunity to go "boom netting". Boom netting is basically being dragged behind a boat at full speed while hanging on to a giant net and it is exactly as bad of an idea as it seems to be: you desperatly try to get the salt water out of your mouth and eyes as the ropes dig in to your feet and hands. On top off it all you have to do this lying awkwardly between the legs of strangers or on top of their lower parts.

At least now we know not to do that again!

The wetsuit I got felt more like a chainmail than a wetsuit and filled up with air so much that I couldn't dive under water. Maybe my wetsuit was a floating device designed for war? Luckily Alex's wetsuit was a little more flexible so he managed to get some good photos while in the water.๐Ÿ‘‡

The Tangalooma wrecks consist of fifteen wrecks that are sunk in a long line just about a hundred meters away from the beach at Tangalooma island. Not to worry though, this isn't the Bermuda triangle: the wrecks were towed there and sunk intentionally to create a habitat for the marine life in Moreton bay as natural coral reefs are getting more destroyed and bleached for each year. The first wreck was placed as early as 1963 so you can imagine how dilapidated and rusty the wrecks are at this date.

Even though the wrecks have been there for a long time now I was still surprised to see how fast and to what big extent the marine life had developed around them. There wasn't one piece of metal that wasn't covered in some sort of coral or shells, and the variety of fish and other marine creatures was wider than I've ever seen anywhere! Yep, Great Barrier reef and Phillipines included. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

We saw Gill from Finding Nemo (Moorish idol fish)! ๐Ÿ 

We spotted this incredibly beautiful Moray eel!๐Ÿ˜

We even spotted Nemo himself (clownfish!) ๐Ÿ˜

Even though the water was a little bit chilly I could've stayed the whole day just to observe, explore and take photos of this extraordinary wildlife. Nontheless, it was time to get back to the boat and the staff wasn't keen on waiting. As a last experience before we got out of the water they gave us some bread to feed the fish, and they were hungry! ๐Ÿž

On the way back to the boat we managed to spot a pufferfish and a bunch of sea stars as well, although unforutnately we didn't get an opportunity to snap a photo of them. ๐Ÿก๐ŸŒŸ

As we got back on board the boat we couldn't wait to get out of the wetsuits and get some food in our systems. The lunch consisted of chicken/ham sandwiches with prawns and even though it wasn't the most exclusive feed I've ever had it was just as good as food always is after a long swim. ๐Ÿ”โค

My face on the last picture: "Seriously, drinking your beer while I'm trying to take a photo?" haha

We spent the rest of the day exploring the beach at Tangalooma island where there wasn't much else than a few four-wheel drive campers and a beautiful view and then cruising along the coastline in shallow waters. From the boat we managed to spot "flying fish", giant green sea turtles and after a long time of looking: a dugong! I had never seen a dugong before and got incredibly excited as the big fellow broke the surface to take a breath. We got to see him feed and breathe for about 10-15 minutes before the boat turned back and it was time to go home.

I was originally supposed to go out for dinner with some friends the same night but as it got delayed and I had work the next morning I went straight to bed instead. It didn't take long to fall asleep after such a long, incredible and eventful day ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ’ค

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Family

noun  | famโ€ขiโ€ขly |  \'fam-lฤ“

1 a: People you fight with over stupid things.
2 a: People you can talk to about everything. b: People who understands not just your humour but understand You.
3 a: People who beleive they have the right to to go through your room and sleep in your bed.
b: People who will call you names but will get protective if somebody else does.
4 a: People you love unconditionally.
5 a: People who will always respect your opinion even though it doesn't match their own.
6 a: People whose presence or absence you are always aware of.

b: People you go across the globe for.

The picture above was taken about two and a half weeks ago when my family had woken up to their first day in Australia and we visited Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary together. Together. Can you beleive that? After more than a year apart we found ourself sitting around the same table again,  me, mum, Lukas and Simon. Only this time we were on the other side of the world.

Two intense weeks followed. Without stressing too much, we manged to pack these weeks full with experiences, emotions, laughter, fun and beer.

We spent the firat days cruising on the river, checking out the day - and night life of Brisbane and even managed to get a slight sunburn.โ˜‰

...But then Debbie arrived.

A class two cyclone that decided to not only hit, but also roam around the Australian east coast for days. Even though we weren't too affected by the winds, the aftermath of the cyclone hit Brisbane with an insane amount of rain, which caused floods in the city and therefore all schools and businesses had to close. We couldn't leave the aparment for a whole day.

And yes, Bull sharks eat people.

So, we left sinking Brisbane behind and flew to Cairns. At least there the sun was shining and Lukas and Simon got to sleep in proper beds rather than on inflateable matresses.
We got on a boat the next day which took us straight out to the extraordinary Great Barrier Reef where we enjoyed a day exploring the beautiful Coral sea from above as well as under water. ๐Ÿ ๐Ÿ™

Cairns is famous for its surroinding nature. Not only the sea, but also the tropical rainforests and spectacular water flows. Though, the distances are quite large so as a birthday present to myself as I aged from 20 to 21, I got us a Pajero Sport and drove us the 410km back and forth to the famous Daintree rainforest, Mossman gorge and Cape Tribulation.

As we came back to Brissy it was time to attend a remarkable rugby leauge game at the Suncorp stadium. Alex joined us and explained the game to us as Brisbane's Broncos won a glorious victory against Sydney's Roosters.

A couple of nights later our holiday together was starting to come to an end, but before that we had one more birthday to celebrathe and that was Lukas's. As a symbol of his growth (or just a random coinsidence) we went to the top of Mount Coot-Tha and enjoyed a near 360ยฐ view over the city I live in.

Later on, our sweet tooth was started craving attention. We were initially after cake, but then stumbled upon "Cowch": a milky cocktail bar that serves alcohol infused desserts - Does it get any better than that? ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿธ๐Ÿ˜

And then before we knew it we stood gathered outside the gate at the international terminal and kind of realised that that was it. No more cramping four people into a room that's built for one. No more silly internal jokes. No more family breakfasts. No more touristy confusion.

The fast goodbye soon escalated to a lump in my throat as soon as I realised they were now going to the other side of the planet while I was going ten minutes down the road to an empty apartment. It was hard to ignore the obvious absence of my family.

Though, it kind of didn't get to me how much we managed to experience during these two weeks at first. After the visit I was actually quite exhausted both physically and emotionally after two very intense weeks. I got straight back to work, hosted a birthday celebration, caught up with a bunch of different things and prople and yea, didn't really have much time to reflect on what I had just experienced.

I kind of get it now as I've had time to scroll through photos and memories. Even though the intense holiday-in a holiday was tiring at times I wouldn't change a thing. I'm so amazingly privileged to have a family that cares for and respects my interests to the point that they arrange to meet up with me on the other side of the planet just so I can show them my world.

I love you to bits and I am so grateful you spent the time, the trouble, the money and the energy to do this trip with me. I owe you one. ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒŽ๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ’•

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Hi everyone!
Sorry for the super late update! As you might know I went to a wedding a couple of weeks ago, and all this time I've just been waiting for the wedding photos to be uploaded so that I could share the day with you all and finally reveal what dress I wore! ๐Ÿ‘—

The professional photos have still not been uploaded though and I've kind of given up on waiting for them, so I guess I'll have to make this post using only the private photos from the wedding that I've managed to steal (most of them are not mine).

This was the first wedding I've been to in a long time so I was extremely excited when getting in the car after putting my dress and heels on. Me and Alex got picked up by Georgia's friend Rosie at Alex's house and met up with his family at their hotel before we got in the cab to the actual wedding.

The wedding was held at the couple's newly-built, just-finished house (more like a mansion!!) and the reception was just gorgeous! Heaps of beutiful people waiting on the huge balcony/back yard with a view over the city. An open bar, delicious catered finger food and lovely weather also contributed to the amazing vibe and you could feel excitement filling the air as the time went by.

And then it was time for the actual ceremony. It was so sweet to see the couple wispering and smiling to each other as the priest was having his speech. Even though I didn't know the couple all too well, I was almost a bit teary as they both said "I do". ๐Ÿ’

The the night continued with speeches, more food and drinks, photographs and eventually also the cutting of the beautiful and giant wedding cake.๐Ÿฐ

As the wedding reception started to die down I swapped from my elegant blue dress to a sparkly golden dress and met up with my Swedsh girls for a night out in the city where we stayed until about 4am. ๐Ÿธ

Typical me not being able to stop moving or talking as people take photos of me ๐Ÿ˜ถ๐Ÿ™ˆ

It was a long and eventful day and I wish I could do it all over again, but for now my focus is on something even more exhilarating: My mom and two brothers are coming HERE on SUNDAY!!!

I just want to fast forward until they get here and then press slow motion the moment they arrive. I'm the happiest daughter/sister in the world to have my family go around the globe to visit little me โค

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I wrote this post yesterday, and once I was finished writing it, I posted it. It was always my intention to post it, so I did. I also deleted it as soon as it had been uploaded as I kind of realised it was out there for everyone to read. The post was exposed, I was exposed, and that freaked me out. As I woke up this morning with new energy I gave this post a big "HELL NO" when I asked myself if I wanted to upload it again. But now, 17 hours later when it's just past midningt and it's about 24 hours ago I since wrote this particular post, I've changed my mind. Again.

...Or more like: convinced my mind that my heart wants this intimate piece of thought up there, out there, for everyone ro read and judge and despise and love and hopefully learn from or get clarity from.

Bear in mind though, that this particular piece of thought that you are about to read is not a cry for help. Neither is it a call for empathy. The following post is literally just me trying to express in text what I beleive most people experience at least once in their lives, and that is all.



Earlier today when I was having a shower I got a sudden a unexpected flash back from how things were normally just about a couple of months ago.

I was just washing the shampoo out of my hair when suddenly my heart dropped to the floor and I could feel my breaths getting shallower and pace up to a rythmic, paniced pace, simlar to a rabbit's breathing when stressed.

The trigger ?

"Blood stains won't make it matter
Got good things, got you"

A song. Of corse it was a bloody song.

As always when I'm home alone I was playing music in the shower (and yes, sometimes I sing..) as speakers and phones are waterproof now a days. Nothing strange, I was actually in quite a pumped mood after completing 45 minutes on the treadmill at the gym just before.

Then that song came on. I had actually queued it myself before I got in the shower since it used to be my favourite song not long ago. I used to listen to it when I felt down and even though I thought the lyrics wasn't at all fitting my situaton, I used to feel like I could relate to the song and that it made me calmer.

In fact, the song wore me down as it described what I was doing to myself and in the weak state I was, I didn't realise that it actually triggered me to be harder on myself.

"Are you lonely, are you there when I'm not in the room
Are you only, only a part of this when you choose"

This song really got to me when I was down but I had no idea back then what effect it had on me. I didn't know why it made me cry while I sang the words loudly in my car or why I put it on repeat even though I was sick of Sam Margin's blue voice long ago. I just knew it made me feel something, and that was better than nothing.

I had never experienced anxiety, panic or severe self doubt before it hit me at the end of last year. Therefore, I was open as a book as it came sneaking up on me and that's why it hit me so hard. I just couldn't believe it. Couldn't beleive that it could happen to me, and that's why it took me so long to understand what was going on with me.

"Is it real, is it something that you can not touch
Do you feel, do you feel that you feel too much"

A common mistake among people suffering from anxiety is that they keep going. It's common that successful people with a high paced life find themselves feeling a bit off, and then before they know it they're eating pills of the hands of psychiatrists. Many would call this phenomenom "hitting the wall": productive people that forget to care about their mental health and keep preassuring themselves until they're too mentally exhausted to think another reasonable thought without freaking out, physically.

"Something crazy, something changing in the way you talk"

For me, it was the opposite. I used to be that person who had a packed schedule, every day, every week, every year. If I had a space free in my "life roster", I'd make sure to fill it quickly and be careful that everything I did "developed me" and brought me forward.

Here, in Australia, I showed up with a near empty life roster. The only thing I knew that I was here to do, was pretty much seeing Alex. Obviously, this drastic contrast in lifestyle got to me eventually. It took a long, long time for me to complete my life puzzle on this side of the world and to get a context of my own. Much longer than I expected it to take, and it was so much harder than I expected it to be.

Despite the support I had from Al, in order to get better:

I would have to fight through this alone.

"Blood stains make confusing patterns
That lead me to you"

It's hard to describe mental illness and even harder to relate to it for those who haven't experienced it. But I can say one thing: It helps to be prepared. And it helps to talk, no matter how hard it is.

Today, in the shower, when I could feel all my positive energy get drained from me and numbness consume me I knew what was going on. I was prepared and I was not in the mood to fall back to being the miserable mess I found myself being at the end of last year.

I opened my eyes, took control of my breathing as I stared at my speaker like it would feel guilty for what it had done to me and change songs. It didn't, obviously, and I was just going to go and change songs myself when I challenged myself. It was risky, but it was also a way to prove to myself that I was over this sh*t and that I was stronger than to let a stupid song bring me down.

So, I listened to the whole thing. In the shower. With cold water still flushing down on my head.

"Gonna drown, I give up and get on with the life lived good"

And then it was over. The next song rolled on, and I was fine.

"Get back never get back too soon
Get back never get back too soon
Get back never get back...."

Fine, as in: not lost or shaking or being unable to breathe. As in being able to stand up, look myself in the mirror and keep going. Keep doing what I was doing instead of wasting minutes, sometimes hours, days in bed trying to recover.

Get back never get back

To say that I was completely untouched by the incident would be a lie. I definitely felt that "emotional hangover" for hours afterwards but only in the form of being easily provoked or grumpy (which is me in general if I'm hungry or tired anyway).

I got over it, and I feel so damn good about it. I got over it, on my own. I fought through it, on my own. I don't need any better evidence that I'm strong enough to take on whatever life choses to throw at me.

And that. That has made me grown more as a person than any packed schedule ever has.

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Another week in paradise has passed and this one has been spent mostly working, climbing and socialising. I met up with Shelley again last Friday to get her advise in finding a dress for a wedding that's held in less than two weeks..

And yep, I'm going to a wedding! Alex's uncle (who we celebrated Christmas day with) is getting married soon and I'm invited (yay!👐). I'm so excited to go to the wedding. Partly because I haven't really been to a proper wedding since I was like what, 12 years old(?), but especially since it's held here; in wonderful Australia. 🌴

After a lot time spent walking between shops and struggling in dressing rooms we found a goreous dress (that you probably won't see until the wedding 😘 cliffhanger alert!⚠).

Even if I imagined something pastel or patterned it was love at first sight when I tried this dark marine blue dress on. The girl working by the dress rooms let my try the dress together with beautiful golden stilettos and I would have bought them too if it wasn't because were not allowed to wear heels at the wedding (it would ruin the couple's brand new wooden floor). 😬👠

After me and Shelley had parted in the city it was time for me to go home and get ready for Swedes' night out ! I met up with four amazing girls that had just arrived in Brisbane and together we had some drinks at my place. 🍸

We might have gotten a little bit too funny at the apartment and left a little bit too late so we might have been a little bit messy while out at the bar... But it was definitely a crazy and fun night! 💎

Yes, he hates when I take sneaky photos of him. No, it doesn't stop me from doing it.

Sunday night it was time for Alex to be hungover as he was out for pre-uni drinks with his study mates the night before. And what better way to cure a hangover than with fresh Vietnamese ice coffe at our favorite bagel shack? I can't think of anything. ☕💕

Yeah I can be quite awkward, too.

Oh! Also! Since my last post, my car has managed to break down and get fixed as well. One day it just didn't start, I assumed it was just the battery that was dead so Alex came over to jump start it. The jump start worked, and I assumed the problem was solved.

...Nope, the next morning when I was in a rush to get to work the car wouldn't start again. Upset and stressed I got a cab to work and called a mechanic immediately as I came home.

The mechanic was outside my house in less than an hour and diagnosed my battery: f*cked. Even though replacing it put a 250$ hole in my wallet, I was so releived it wasnt a bigger problem than that!

It's now Thursday night and I'm looking forward to tomorrow as me and Alex are going to treat ourself a spa night after work with detoxing herbs and himalayan salt🙏

I mean, detoxing on Friday justifies possible intoxication on Saturday, right?🍹😇

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