Hey, I am back!

So I started to counting calories and macros again after a long break of it.

The first reason - I am having more control over my body then and I am able to understand it more. It is actually so damn interesting to see how your body reacts to different calories intake and specific macro balance. It's like my own science. I am not completely sure what works best for my body, so I need to try out different things to find my own.

The second reason is that I am not craving unnecessary food if I am putting healthy balanced menu together using Myfitnesspal app. And one problem what was with not counting anything was that my calories were sometimes too low. I ate big volume foods which kept me full,but calories were pretty low although I was full. If I one day inserted my typical menu to see how much calories I ate, I was badly suprised because it was only 1400-1600. NB! I wasn't starving, I was really full all the time.

Now I am increasing my calories intake and want it to keep at my maintainance level for a while (about 2000-2100). More active days, when I am doing 2 workouts a day, I can even raise it to 2500 I think. I am not worried if I gain weight or something. Muscles need food to grow :) Right now I am just curious to see what happens if I am eating more. It will do a nice thing for my metabolism definitely. Because usually metabolism will slow down if you don't eat enough.

Anyways, I am feeling so much better with more calories and carbs. More strenght, which is much needed for heavy workout sessions. I don't get it why so many girls are afraid of carbs. Only eat veggies with meat. I was like that too once. But actually when I was low carb, I felt weak at the gym, I was unable to train heavier. And no musclegrowth at all, even if I gave best of myself. And also, I was so bloated all the time. Now if I am eating more whole grain foods not only veggies with meat, and my bloatiness doesn't happen so often. And I don't think you need to be low carb to lose weight. You can still be moderate, but just need to burn more calories than consuming as you probably know already.

Of course I want to lose some fat because i am not shredded enough :D But I am no obsessed about it anymore. Because If I am too obsessed about something that I don't like about body, then it won't get better. Less stress and stress less ! ;) It's SO OKAY to not be shredded 24/7 all year. Even fitness competitors are not shredded all the time and a little more softier in offseason. Only those who are naturally skinny type and don't gain fat, are probably all the time shredded with 6pack. Lucky them! But no need to compare yourself to others. Embrace the softiness, it's normal :) There are so many fitnessmodels nowadays, who don't have abs and wearing a little bit extra fat and still being happy, confident and beautiful.

See - currently my abs hide themselves under the fat layer :D:D only in the morning after waking up they appear. But my back is getting wider, which is so great because if you want to compete in bikini fitness, then wide back is important. Some of you may think now that I am like some huge closet walking around :D but no, the wide back appears only when you flex and taking some specific pose for that. Bikini fitness competitors are all pretty tiny, but on stage when they flex, it's awesome how nice muscles and wide back they have!

Today I had a killer glutes day. I already wrote my routine to Instagram, so I am just copying it here.

1. Warm up: leg kickback machine 4x.

2. Warm up: hip abductions 4x

3. Barbell hip thrust 5x
4. Barbell sumo squat 4x
5. Stiff leg deadlift 5x
6. Kettlebell squats 4x
7. Hip abductions 3x
8. Hip adductions 3x

I only wrote the number of series, because my reps are different, depends on how much weight is on. Lower reps if heavy weights and higher reps if lighter weights. Today I did heavier. I was so exhausted after that, but also very happy. It's so great feeling if I have given my best. It's not easy to grow glutes, but I am working hard on it. And remember 1 thing - you have to eat a lot to make glutes grow. And lift heavy. Getting bulky with heavy weights is just a myth. It's damn hard to get muscles I can tell you. And to get bulky, you need to do it even harder. :D So no worries babes. Training without weights or all the time same light weight and only with machines, you don't get that nice booty. DO IT HARD! Put some effort in it. Glutes are stubborn, but I am even more stubborn so I am making these bitches grow :D Haha that was great sentence, just invented my own quote :D::D

I am always so exhausted if I do hip thrust, deadlift and squats. But it pays off. Even abs are working while doing it, because heavy weight makes them tense to help achieve the exercise.

So this is it for now!

Lots of love,


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Hey !

Today I want to share my progress with you. I made a progress pic of my back last weekend, to compare it with the picture made in February. Sorry about the quality too.

I was so shocked actually. My first thought: wtf was I really SO out of shape in the winter? :D I really didn't remember that picture until I opened it. As you can see, I've lost some bodyfat, that makes my muscles appear a little more. I've also gain more strenght and muscle mass. And my glutes are in better shape now too.

In the first picture I was too obsessed with my shape and weight. I tried so hard and ate so clean and exercised so hard, but still had that miserable shape. I believe that I overthinked and stressed about it way too much, which is so bad for your progress and doesn't let anything good happen to you.

On the current picture I am being so much more flexible with food and exercising. I don't get angry at myself anymore if I didn't make it to the gym as much as I wanted to. I don't get angry if I am eating big ice cream box by myself at late evening. The less you stress about it, the less it will affect your body. You don't get fat overnight anyway.

I really understand all these desperate girls who want to lose weight so bad, but nothing changes. I was like this too. But once you change your mindset and not taking food as your enemy, then things start to change ;) !

Feel free to ask me something or if you just want to text me :) I love all my readers.




Hey guys!
I have good news - I finally got my driver license! My driving exam turned out so well, didn't do any mistakes, although I was pretty nervous, but who wouldn't because it's so important driver exam that is only one step far from getting license?

Also, my weight has finally started to drop. It has been same like 1 year basically. Even though I hustled so hard always and was as healthy as possible. But the fact that scale is changing now, is amazing, because I actually don't eat as clean and planned as I did before. I mean, I eat clean, but I allow myself more cheatmeals and don't eat in a planned way. I don't count macros, calories. I don't have planned meal times, I just eat when my body tells me "give me fooood". I am so much happier when I am not stuck in some numbers or limitations of food. My only limitation is dairy, because my body doesn't like it at all. But when I want to bake a cake then I use dairy products. They don't bother my tummy when they're in a baked cake hahaπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ okay this might seem the same as: I am eating veggies, in a cake! πŸ˜‚ but dairy products as a cooked version don't give me same symptoms as eating them raw. So, give me cake or I won't eat dairy lolπŸ˜‚I love cheesecakes and curd cakes,yummi!!

So I can say my relationship with food has become better and better every day. If I look back, my menu was healthy, but my mind wasn't. It was like hate-love relationship with food. It's better to not restrict yourself so hard, it's only making your fitness journey harder. After changing my mindset and perspective about food and fitness, my body is starting to co-operate with me!

I started to love photography. I've also realised how amazing nature is and actually you can capture a really great shot everywhere, if you want to.
It's my new hobby. Kristo and I both love it, and we always argue who can hold the camera and who is posing. Of course we both want to be behind the camera. I don't feel like a model and I don't know how to pose well haha πŸ˜‚ I find it so hard to look pretty. Taking selfies is so much easier, because I can see on the screen how I am going to look. But if someone taking pictures of me then I am going to be really weird πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ it takes time to get a great photo of me seriously. But it's worth it.





Hey guys!

Today I want to share a great healthy muffin recipe that i got from Tuuli (https://www.instagram.com/ttttuuli/.

I didn't do it exactly like she did, but the idea is same. I never follow recipes, I always adjust amounts by eye and do it in my own way. I have followed the recipes in the past, but they never turned out the way I wanted to, so now I just trust my inner "chef" haha :D

1 muffin contains: 130 kcal (7g carbs, 9.3g fat, 5g protein)


40g unsweetened cocoa

35g whole grain oat flour

2 large eggs

60g unflavoured plain yogurt / greek yogurt

60g lactose free milk (you can use any milk)

30g coconut oil (melted)

sweetener (I used stevia, because it's natural and doesn't raise blood sugar + zero calories), add as much as you feel it's sweet enough for you


20g dark chocolate (I used 85% dark)

45g almonds

1,5 tsp baking powder

pinch of salt


How to make:

Whip eggs, stevia and pinch of salt. Add yogurt and milk, then cocoa, oat flour and baking powder. Then melt coconut oil and add to the dough. Put raspberries to the muffin forms ( I used silicone forms, because muffins come out from them easily and nothing sticks to the forms). Then add dough and put chopped chocolate and almonds to the top. I baked them about 20-25 min in 200Β°C. But use toothpick to make sure that muffins are ready and not raw. Every oven is different so it depends on that.

Next time I am going to double the amounts to make more muffins, this time I only got 9 :(

Kristo bought me new gym gloves, because I lost my previous ones. It's so much better to work out with gloves because hands and fingers doesn't slide when they get sweaty or whatever. And nothing doesn't rub them. Now it's so much better for me to do pull ups and lift heavy.

Right now I have actually nothing interesting to write, because I've been only at school and gym :D

But yesterday when Kristo and I went to Haapsalu, our tire broke. We both have never changed the tire, but Kristo handled it very well and fast :) He put on emergency tire, but it's just temporary and you can't drive with that a long distance or fast. We drove slowly just in case. Unfortunately every tire repair shop is closed at weekends, so we have to wait for the new week. For now we have to ride with train and buses :D Yay.




Hey guys!

Welcome to my new blog! This time, I decided to write my blog in English. The first reason is that I just want to improve my English and don't want to forget this language since I don't use it every day. And more important reason, not all of the readers are Estonian people, but I want everyone to understand my posts. I apologize if my writing isn't the best, but I try to not make much mistakes ;)

So.. yesterday I woke up and it was pretty hard to get up from the bed, because my glutes were so damn sore from yesterday's workout. To be honest, I wasn't sure at gym if my workout was good enough, cause I was tired and didn't have so much motivation as I usually do. Somedays just aren't as good as others. But these are my dedication and passion that keep me going, even if I don't want to. We don't get better at things if we do them only when we want to. But the glutes muscle pain I am having today, is definitely telling me that I did a good job with them yesterday. Booty's growing, yeyyy!

By the way, I received a package that https://vitamins.ee/ sent me for free, just to try out. I was so happy and grateful. It's my first time to try something out for free. But my review is still going to be honest about these products. They sent me Proteinella, which is like Nutella but way more protein and low in sugar. And they also sent me Protein Pancakes Mix, cookies and cream flavor.

My proteinella is white chocolate flavoured, which taste is exactly like melted white chocolate, and there's a slight protein taste too, but it doesn't ruin it. You can add it to the porridge, pancakes, toast or wherever you want to. It was really tasty and good spread for the pancakes. The 250g can costs 5.95 euros. There are 3 flavors: smooth&creamy, super cruchy and white chocolate. But just like Nutella, it contains a lot of calories, so don't over eat :D 100g contains 496kcal.

Pancake Mix powder smelled really good, really similar to Fast Cookies&cream pudding. There was also some little brown cookie pieces. It was really easy to make, just mix with water. Pancake dough was good and thick, didn't stick to the pan. They were crispy and fluffy, just the way I like it. Although the dough tasted like cookies&cream, the ready made pancakes were like regular pancakes. Don't get me wrong, they were still very delicious. But what I didn't like about them, was the ingredients like wheat flour and sweeteners (sucralose, acesulfame-K). I am trying to avoid these chemical sweeteners, which actually are in many many "health", zero calorie, protein products. But if you don't consume them a lot and often, then it's okay.

Overall, I really enjoyed these 2 products. I still prefer real food and real pancakes, but it's nice to have some easy,simple & fast desert like this sometimes :) Thank you vitamins.ee !

As I mentioned before, that sometimes there just isn't any motivation to work out. What helps me with that? How to get motivation back?

Usually there's just 2 options for me:

1) suck it up and still go to gym, for the great after-gym-feeling


2) take a rest day or even 2 days and do something pleasant.

Second option is great, because if I don't go to gym that day then I am going to miss it so badly and can't wait to go back there again. Sometimes you just need to be away from somebody/something, to realise how important it is to you.

Yesterday evening Kristo and I went to spa. Swimming, hot tub and saunas are so good and relaxing, for the body and also the mind. Now I feel that my body is so relaxed and free, muscles are less sore and feeling so fresh.

For an extra motivation boost, I just like to watch slideshow about my goals. At the beginning of our relationship, we both decided to make a list about our dreams and goals of life. We didn't show them to each other until they were ready. Suprisingly, we both made powerpoint slideshows not just a list on paper or sth :D And what's even more important, that it was sick how much we had same stuff there! On some slide we had put even same photos. I can't believe how same we are :D At this point I realise that he's the one. Last year we both made a tiger tattoo on our arm, with the same tiger picture. And it was the first thing in our goals list that we made real. And many more are coming.

That's all for today, have a nice end of the weekend!