Where to begin...
Well, moved to mom. I don't know what to do or what's right anymore. Right now I just got to see the situation from a bright side. Need to see it from perspectives.
Holding on for summer, then one more year in high school. By then I hope I have at least some species figured out.
But once again, life has ups and downs. And to have ups, you need downs.
So I'll just keep climbing until I get to the top.

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​When is he going to realise that Im not 5 years old anymore?!? 

To say that I´m too young for something, sure that´s fine but it´s not fine to take something from me. Besides it´s none of his buisness. 

Thank god I have this beautiful friens that´s always there for me. I mean when I texted her about this she was like fuck him. we´re going to the mall tommorow and he can´t do anything about and ofc we´re going to buy and try even worse things. And the fun thing is that I wasn´t even wearing anything sexy, just something very comfortable.  I know that EVERY girl would say the same about them. They´re so soft, it doesn´t even feel like you have anything on.

So much have changed with him trough out these couple of years. We have had so many fights (even tho he denies it) and I´ve cried like a hundred times beacause of him and he don´t even knows it.  I don´t even know if I wanna call him a parent anymore. 

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And now my friends are trying to make someone hate me forever. I know I should have told him before but I was scared I was going to lose him as a friend if I would have told him how I felt. 

Well now they have told him for me which I hate. Am I ever gonna be able to look at him without feeling guilty. 

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I´ve got a feeling that something is going on in the bedroom next to me... Maybe someone making pop noises or picking feathers from a bird I really don´t know and I don´t care eather. Actually that is something that I´ve been saying a lot and I don´t know if it´s true or if I´m lying to not just others, even myself.

It feels hard to hear them fight about all that has happened. And that is only one tiny thing...  After she cheated on him it feels like all he´s doing is just following her ass all over every place. Where she sits he has to sit and it has to be exactly like her cause otherwise he´ll lose his seat. I mean doesn´t that seem a bit unfair. Even tho I think he´s immature and selfish I still love him and want the best for him and I have to stop pretend like I don´t care cause I may think I do.

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Do you ever consider being able to undo things and knowing if you should have done it in a different way? Not actually do it, but you just have it in mind. Your not sure about the fact that you want to change something but still you want it so bad since all you do is thinking about it.

Well I do. I´ts frustrating. When not knowing if you did the right or the wrong thing is like not being able to see the results of a project you´ve been working on for too long.

It´s actually like starting a blog. You know it´s gonna go downhill after the you´ve written the first two to three posters so you don´t even bother trying.

But what if you did?....

What if I had kept trying to make it work and to make the best out of it.

If I just had held on to it a little longer, would I have changed my mind? Well That´s the question I don´t want to know the answer of, there´s no point of knowing since both answers will make me sad. And if there´s something I know very clearly.

The level of frustration when not knowing, is way better than the level when knowing and not being able to do something about it.

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Okey, can I just write something really random? Well I mean... LOOK at this hottie!?! I could mary him, he´s so cute!



This is actually just a test a just wanted to see how it came out so if anyone reads this, haha.

​yep so that´s it. someone else that loves channing or is it just me?!?! 

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