When we think of Mexico we all have some small stereotypes for sure. Tequila, Tacos and sombreros are some of those. Another one is that the police is super corrupt. Yes, tequila is Mexicos national drink. Yes Tacos are eaten widely and yes sombreros are being worn there. I have experienced tequila, tacos, sombreros and yes, unfortunately the corrupt Mexican police as well. This is one of my favorite stories. Not in the moment when it happened to me, but for sure now afterwards because when I think back. of it, djeeees it was crazy! So here is the story, vamos.
So there I was, just landed in Mexico. Came to my apartment that had absolutely nothing in it. No pillows, no sheets, no towels and no WiFi. Thank got there was at least electricity. After flying so far you get super tired and because of the jet lag, I did not manage to get any sleep at all. So 2 days later I was supposed to go see my manager at the office. So I toke the car, that I later on named Doris. and started to drive along the hotel zone. Super exhausted - no life in the body - Oscar drives along the road minding his own business when all of sudden there is a Police car behind me. He has the blue lights on and the sirens. I was in the left lane so I slowed down a bit and changed lane so he can pass me. But no! He also slows down and starts waving at me to pull over. I was like what?! The F did I do?? So I pull over in the closest small parking thing on the side of the road. The police stops right behind me. He has a super modern and muscly brand new Ford Mustang. I have a, probably fake, Dodge Attitude that is not very fast nor safe. The police man is short, in his late 40is and looks like he could not run more than 20meters. I am 21 years old, tired, exhausted and now very nervous.
"Hola, you why were you going so fast? This is a 70 km/h zone" The Mexican police says to me.
"Heeey Sir, I am sorry but I was not going to fast" I reply.
Yes, you were going 98 km/h. You can only drive 70 km/h here.
Uhm sir no! I was not going more than 68 km/h. Promise!
At this time he asks for my drivers license which I, being an innocent swedish person, of course give to him. He take it and suddenly says: So you need to pay me 2000 dollars or you can give me a blow job here. Can you even imagine how chocked I was? I mean now after this I am prepared for everything and probably would not care. But right there and then when I was completely exhausted and nervous it all just really came to me. WHAT THE HELL?! I thoguht for my self and said something like: Uhm, I dont have 2000dollars....
"So, do you have one boyfriend or something? You and me can make a nice romance" He says.
No sir I do not have a boyfriend.
"Hmm okay, do you have a girlfriend?" He continues.
******BTW pause^, like who would ever think that I have a girlfriend.. A girlfriend? ME? BAHAHAHA LOL jokes on him! ******
Anyways in the moment I was so chocked and could not believe this was happening. I remember reaching for my phone and noticing my hands shaking SO MUCH! I could barely even open my pass code for the screen. Like I was SO. FREAKING: NERVOUS. At this point the very short Mexican policeman decided to start grabbing his dick. Right in front of me. Since I was sitting down and he was kind of pressing himself towards the open window his genitals was suddenly very very dangerously close to my face. A lot of this is honestly a blur since I think my brain tried to erase the story from my mind but somehow he ends up in his police car again which is when I realize he took my Drivers License with him.
The nervous and afraid part of me has now gone over to sad/ angry/ upset Oscar who just hates Mexico at this point. I remember feeling like a prostitute walking along the highway over to his car. I was almost crying and to lean into his car to beg: Please sir, I do not want you as a boyfriend and I do not want to give you a blow job. I just arrived from Sweden and all I want is my Drivers License back so I can go back to my work." He looks at me in a very creepy way and says: "Hmm, just because you are from Sweden and because you are very cute I will let you go. Bu just so you know, next time I will fuck you!"
He hands over my license, I say Gracias and walk as fast as I can to my car. I start the engine, and not more then 15 seconds later I realized what actually just happened and burst out in tears. I remember that feeling of being so used kind of, I mean in this case I was not even used but you know what i mean. So end of story, or? OR? NO! Because when I get to the office, ready to tell my manager everything so he would feel bad for me he instead starts blaming me and yelling so much that I know caused him even more paper work and how tired he is bla bla bla. Oh yeah totally forgot to mention that before the police man stopped me I accidentally drove into a pole so that the side view mirror actually flew off. Bahha oups! SO my manager was really angry about me crashing the car and did not at all care about my almost sexual experience with the Mexican Police.
This was definitely not a good start of my stay in Mexico. In the end of the day it really sums up what my stay in mexico felt like and I think it even contributed for me to decide to leave 2 months later. From now on whenever I see the movie We´re the Millers, I can definitely say that I can relate!