Personal Thoughts about topics

Hallo House-lovers!

If you are a house-fan, chances are you already know about the shootings at the BPM festival in mexico. But if you haven't there was a shooting at an EDM festival in Mexico called BPM. 5 people have lost their lives and many more were injured. I believe it was only one shooter and I do believe they could catch him right on the spot. Don't quote me on that though, and if I am wrong, please correct me.

There have been many shootings lately in the world, but this really hit me on a more personal level. Of course, you get touched by every shooting you hear about, and all of them are just as bad. But this one.... Something so close to my heart... a place where people like me are.... I don't know.... it's hard to explain, but I will do my best.

EDM have been a big part of my life for several years now. Ever since my first concert, I have been obsessed with them. There is something special about being in the crowd of a festival. Hearing the base in your heart, seeing people moving around you, feeling the energy from the rest... It's an indescribable feeling. Concerts have festivals have always been my escape, like headphones is when I'm in school. To me it's been a little dreamworld, where you can turn and no one is judging you.

When I was reached by the news, at first I didn't react. I saw a DJ on twitter tweet that he and his team were okay and that he prayed for the people in the crowd. He was taken off the stage during his set because of the shootings. I just thought that it wasn't that dramatic and that the people tweeting was probably just in shock. But later on the updates kept going and soon I found out that people had actually been killed.

At that point, something dropped in my. The paradise I had imagined was in ruins. The safest place on earth for me, festivals and concerts, was the unsafest place. People had died. They were killed. SOmeone had brought in a gun and opened fire. At the same place I feel safe.

I know this probably don't make sense for you, but if you are an EDM-fan like me, you probably understand what I mean. This really hit home at me and I feel sick just thinking about. I pray for the people that were killed, it could have been any of my friends or me. They were house-fans just like me, loved festivals just like me and believed in festivals just like me. No they will never get to go to a festival anymore, and that is awful.

However, I know that the festival security will be stricter now. That is something i really like and I hope this won't become a trend so people won't feel safe at festivals. I do however think that we in the EDM-community shouldn't let this effect us too much. Of course we should be sad for a while, but we shouldn't avoid festivals and concerts. We should keep going on and do our thing, because otherwise we will lose everything we work for.

Let me know your reflections of this and how you feel. I would love to talk to you about this and to make this a healing thing for all of us. I think many if us are shocked about this, even if you don't personally know anyone there or live far away from it.

I hope you enjoyed this post. Keep on working for your dreams and goals and don't forget to spread love. That what we need now. Take care guys. I love you all!

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Personal life

Hello house-lovers!

It's 2017 and I feel great. I have no new music, I'm tired of life, I'm tired of school but I'm good! I just thought that I wanted to get back into the swing of blogging again, both because I like it and because I have so many fun things happening for me this year, that I really wanted to document all of it.

So you are probably wondering what I'm talking about with this "fun things happening for me this year" and I will tell.... Later in this post. But for now I just wanted to just talk about 2016. I know many had a bad year and many people feel done with it. I felt like that too, but then I realised everything that happened and saying my year wasn't good is not fair. My boyfriend moved to Sweden for me, I got promoted at work, I went to the USA for the first time in my life..... It was so much fun too. I have summed it up as the best and worst year at the same time. The year where I done the most changes and learned the most about myself.

But I'm not done growing! In 2017 me and my boyfreind are looking at buying an apartment. I know, it might seem weird that I'm that's only 18 and looking at that, but if everything goes to plan we will own an apartment in August..... Holy shit.... Now you all go "how that fuck can you pay for that?" and the answer is that it's a long story and a story I rather keep to myself. In short terms my parents and grandparents have saved money for me in stocks since I was born and those stock just decided to go up like hell. So we can actually afford an apartment..... in 6 months..... if things goes to plan....

Other than that, in 2017 I am officially done with school and I will get to run out and celebrate . This is something that doesn't only excite me, but also scares the crap out of me! The one safe place (apart from my home) I have had for 3 years is just going away from me. I don't know.... I'm done with school and I can't wait but at the same time it's obviously something different. I has always seemed so far away, but it's happening THIS year.... wow! What I want with this year is to make it a transition year. Finish what I've been working on for 12 years (school) and start my adult life. I wanna get that apartment and learn how to live the best in it so that i can make 2018 the year were I actually can achieve and do things more. Does that make any sense? I thought not...

Anyhow, I wanted to tell you guys my goals. This is not set in stone that I'm gonna do all of this now, but it's things I'm gonna keep in mind and try and achieve!

1. Start going to the gym - I know it's over done, but I really wanna get into working out again. As some of you may know I've been playing basketball for a few years but stopped at the age of 16. I wanna at least get some work outs done. Go on more power walks, try yoga, learn to dance, just try out and see. I'm not planning on losing weight or changing my body in any way. I just feel like it would do me good.

2. Eat better - I don't mean that I'm gonna become a vegan, bare with me! I have already tried as good as possible to cut meat out of my diet (apart from chicken and seafood) and it's been good! I wanna cut the chicken out to and try not to eat too much dairy. Problem is, I'm not that good at finding recipes and I don't really like to cook for people on weekdays. So since I still live at home, it's just not something I'm gonna be able to do now. HOWEVER! When/if we get the apartment my plan is to eat more raw food! I love fruit and vegetables, I don't know anything about raw food but I really wanna try!

3. Get the apartment - I mean, pretty mucha no brainer! I wanna move into an apartment with my boyfriend and live life there! I'm an so excited for having a place on my way and just being able to do what I want and eat what I want and only worry about me and my boyfriend. Start to work, pay rent.... all of that just excites me!

4. The most important one! Be nicer to myself! - I am so tired of feeling like my waist is too big. I'm so tired of always looking at other girls like "she is hotter then me, I'm ugly". I'm sick of feeling like my boyfriend will leave me just because my thighs are "too big". NO! I am perfect, I have nothing to prove. I work my ass off! Sometimes I deserve a break. My body is only gonna wear clothes that flatter it. If I try clothes on that I don't fit in, It's my my body that doesn't fit, It's the clothes. I'm not gonna compare myself with other girls. I'm done with that, I'm too busy being that best I can to see if that girl is hotter than me!

Anyways, I am gonna go now and I hope that you guys can feel my motivation and excitement over this year and I am gonna document everything until I'm where I wanna be. I will always blog about EDM so don't you guys worry! I love you all so much and don't forget how perfect you are! See you!




Hello House-lovers!

Today is a very exciting post because it's not only about me and my boring life.. it's actually what this blog was supposed to be about, EDM. Jasmine (aka Swevicii) kindly helped me and she is gonna talk about the person that I guess you could say introduced me and Jasmine, Avicii. I'm so happy and hype she helped me. She sent me this the 7th of November and it took me up to nw to post it.... shame on me. But anyways.... such life sometimes.

And if you wanna know about my personal life because I haven't blogged in a while I will do that soon. I do still have bad days and okay days but in general it's better than it was. I don't know what else to say but I will update you guys more now.... or at least try. If you want me to blog about any topic in specific, just let me know in any way and I'll do my best to make you guys happy. But enough about that and more about what you came for; here is Swevicii's post. Enjoy!

"Today it is november 7th 2016. In the world of Avicii this year has been a turning point. Tim Bergling has retired from being a DJ to focus on himself and his main interests; being happy and producing music. A good choice that I am very proud of!

How did it lead up to this point, with the retirement? I have been listening to Tim’s production since Fade into Darkness and it is still my favorite to this day. Back then he was not a household name (no pun intended) but merely well known in the electronic dance music scene before it became mainstream. In the late 2012 he began to produce his first ever album. The single for the album True was Wake Me Up. Two days after I graduated senior high school it was released. I came in contact with other fans and that is how my Twitter account @Swevicii came to be. At first people came to me and asked me if I could translate interviews, articles and so on. When the Wake Me Up wagon really took off during the summer of 2013 a community started to form; the Aviciifamily. It was because more people started listening to Tim’s production and they eventually became friends. At the most I think I got 200 new followers daily.

Even if it has been more than three years I look back at the experience with happiness and warmth. I am so lucky to have met the wonderful people within this community. Even if the days of Avicii are gone, the days of Tim Bergling have just started. It is hard to say what is going to happen now with this community but one thing is certain; we are one. Everybody may not be the best of friends but that is also part life. If you like Tim’s production you are already part of the community in spirit.

After the very hectic touring Tim decided to retire. He was doing so many shows it was inhumane to watch him go on, and on, and on. His body started to get affected and eventually he realized the best thing to do was to retire. Tim started this whole journey by producing music and I believe that is where his core interest lies. It was fun to be part of this journey and I am excited for what is to come.

Best regards

Jasmin (@Swevicii)"

So me and Jasmine hope you enjoyed this post. Don't forget that I love you guys and there are people who care, just don't be afraid to reach out to them. Listen to music and keep raving. Have a lovely week and we will talk more soon.



Personal life

Hello House-lovers!

I don't like Mondays.... although I'm free from school today..... I hate being of school because that means a million more things to do. When you go to school, you go to school, do your homework and your done. When you don't have school you have all the things you need to you in school without being in school. Although I like working on my own and I feel like I have a better flow when I do that, I still feel like I'm never done and what I'm doing is never good enough.... Maybe it's just me and my unconfident ways....

Anyhow, lately I've been better, but I do have good and bad days. Sometimes I have days were I just feel like there is no point in living anymore and sometimes I feel like I'm a f*cking boss that rule the world. I still cry quite often and I still feel a little like something isn't quite right. I have a constant feeling of that I'm fucking up or like everything will fuck up soon. I was talking to my boyfriend and he told me the first signs of depression and it actually fitted scaringly well. I'm not depressed though and I donät think I'm in any risk of being but still though.... the feelings sometimes can be so close....

I'm still trying to work hard with school and I feel like I'm doing okay. Also I got promoted a few days ago so that's extremely exciting. Somehow I feel like I now how to work. I have although i'm only 18 already experience in recruiting and administration and somehow I feel like working is my thing. I feel like working is something I can do and that I'm good at. I find purpose in my work. I hate school! I hate being in a classroom of 30 clones of me that are studying the same things as I am, that is learning the same thing, doing the same thing as I am and pretty much think in the same way as I am. At work I feel like I'm needed and special and as my flaws isn't reflecting my future and need to be changed. I feel like my flaws are a "work in progress" and having that feeling is unbelievable. Maybe I'm a workaholic...?

Anyways.... I've been taking tests for my stomach but lately it has been so much better. I still wanna know if there is something wrong though so I'm gonna keep going until I get real answers. As I've said before, "take some painkillers and come back in a week if it's not better" is not acceptable.

But that's all for now. I'll probably check back in later this week and tell you more cause I have a feeling like this week in school is gonna suck!!! But yeah, we'll see. Take care you guys though. Don't forget I love every single one of you out there. Work hard!



Personal life

Hello House-lovers!

For the past few days I've been worse in my mood than an unhappy 5 year-old. I've been so stressed and grumpy and all of those things and my stomach is still bad... I am going for some tests on Thursday though so fingers crossed.

The reason I decided to write again is to say that I do feel better. Although it's still a lot to think about and I still feel fairly alone I feel like I'm making progress. I think the main reason is cause I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now. I thought I would write this because I know many in my age are in this phase now so I hope this might be helpful for all of you. I'm just share my thoughts and how I'm thinking and if you happen to follow this blog you'll get to follow my journey.

So first of all I found out my main goal in life. What do I know for sure that I wanna do? What do I wanna fight for? My answer is that I wanna move in to my own apartment with Oskar. I know, I know.... you all might have a million things you wanna say right now, but I don't care. I don't care what I work with, I don't care where I live, if I do university directly after high school, with some years or do it at all. Those thing I don't know and I keep changing my mind all the time. So why not actually put some effort into the thing I know I want for the rest of my life for sure?

That leads up to a lot of other things. I don't know if you all know but I'm lazy as f*ck! I do as little as I can and half the time not even that. I wanna change that but I've never done it. Something Oskar said to me was "I see you everyday in that sofa with your YouTube. If I ask you to clean up your dirty cloths of the floor or do your studying you are always too tired or have excesses. If you can't even do that, then how in the heavens are you gonna move away at the age of 19?" And you know what? He has a solid point. Although I wouldn't compare our relationship with studying or cleaning, he has a point!

So what will I do? I will start to studying more, take my dirty clothes away, do something! My plan is to do things before dinner and after dinner relax and start to unwind. In that way I have plenty of time in the day and I'm able to slowly go into sleep mode which in return hopefully can make me sleep better. I've also had a lot of sleeping issues, did I say that?

So I know I've said this a million times, but now I actually see a purpose in what I've doing. I've tried thinking I'll be more active for my own sake or my parents sake. But since that hasn't worked, maybe I can change that to do it for the fact that I'm planning on moving out. I hope that will happen at least...

Anyways, I hope you guys found this post a little helpful if you're in that stage that you don't know what to do with your life. Figure out what you wanna do long term and go with that. I hope the rest will fall into place.

So until next time, take care and don't forget that I love you all very much!❤