Hi friends, here we are again. It has been more than a year since I have written anything here. A whole year has gone past, things have changed, people have come and gone out of my life. I have grown, learnt, experienced, loved, laughed, cried, been angry, been in love, experienced loss and more than anything I have kept going despite the hardship. I have met some fantastic people and I have had some amazing friends that have been by my side through it all. Grateful is my word for this year. Although it has been the most challenging year in my life I wouldn't want it to be anything else. I am exactly where I need to be right now and I am grateful for that.
If I look back at the Nadja from the 30th of December 2016 I could never have prepared her for some of the things that she got to experience this year. The main thing was when I discovered that I have an autoimmune disease called celiac disease. It felt like my whole world was turned upside down. I could no longer eat pasta or bread, something that has always been a big part of my diet. Not only was it to avoid gluten but to also avoid cross contamination, having to buy new pots that I hadn't cook gluten in. From never heard of the word gluten I now probably say it or read it at least 10 times a day. I have now been gluten free for more than 6 months and I can finally say that I'm feeling at peace with it. Sure, sometimes when I smell fresh bread my mouth waters but I would never risk my health for a short satisfaction. Even though I haven't managed to find any tasty gluten free breads I'm excited about buying a bread maker and make my own bread, without all the crappy stuff that is in processed bread.
Another recent change in my life is that I have chosen to go vegan. Being on a gluten free diet and occasionally buying products labelled "gluten free" majority of these products are also vegan. Amazing right?! I have never been a big meat eater, the only times I really ate meat was when I went out for dinner. Because of my celiac I'm choosing to not go out for dinner anymore which means no more meat. I know it is gonna be an extra challenge because some gluten free products do have eggs in them but I am confident that it is going to work for me. Next Friday I am having an iron infusion because my iron has been dangerously low recently and after that I am going to keep a strict eye on my iron levels, potentially eat some vitamins if I need to. I am excited about following a plant based diet and I am excited about the healing my body will undergo. It also feels good to know that I am not contributing to the negative affects the meat production has on our planet. It is a baby step for me and I am looking into other ways I can contribute to a healthier planet. We all can do something!
Together with my friend Ymke, I have started to go to the gym. I never saw myself on a person who was able to do this. In the beginning I felt uncomfortable going to classes when Ymke couldn't come with me but now I feel more comfortable in my own skin. The reason why I choose to get a membership is because I know the positive effects exercising has on me. I get so much out from using my body, I feel happier, stronger and like I have more energy. This morning I went to the gym for a class and afterwards I went running for 20 minutes. I always had this idea that because I am a water polo player I am not a good runner.
The funny thing is, you can do anything you set your mind to. I think that takes us to the next step of my journey. With the new year coming up I'm trying to decide where to go next in my life. It is almost like I am standing at a crossroad, do I go left or right? I want different things for different reasons. Yet I haven't decided what I want 2018 to look like and that is okay. I am in for the ride and I won't have any expectations on the year. I will make decisions I think is best for my path, my well-being and my genuine self. I am excited about focusing on myself this year, putting myself first, loving myself unconditionally.
The 31 of January to the 10 of February I am doing a meditation recruit in Queensland. You are not interacting with anyone, unless you want to interact with your teacher. There will be no cellphones, computers, books, nothing. Just myself, my body, my thoughts, I. I am confident that it is gonna be challenging and I am ready for this challenge. I have no idea what it is gonna look like but I am throwing myself in the deep end and I am ready to swim.
Happy new year friends! Please be safe when you celebrate the new year. Let the new year bring us happiness, peace, love, challenges, hardship, friendship, growth and adventures!
For new beginnings!