When I logged into my blog this morning, I saw that I updated last 30 days ago. 30 DAYS??! Where is the time going? I was thinking it was more like 7 days ago...

Time really does fly by so fast after you become a mom. In the beginning life takes a completely different turn. All of a sudden you don't decide when you eat and sleep and meet your friends. The baby does. It was hurtful to realize that you are no longer the same person you used to be. You have to give up a lot to become a mom. You are stepping into a completely new life and your priorities change, your way of thinking change and you change. A small part of you gets broken down in order to be able to build something so much stronger

After almost 6 weeks of being a mom, things do get easier. You get used to letting the baby decide and you find new ways of doing stuff. Right now I feel so much better than I did in the beginning. The first week was very rough and I was very emotional. I think it's very normal to feel overwhelmed and lost, but just know, it gets easier. I just had to get used to this new life, when you plan only 2 hours ahead, and spend a lot of time indoors.

There is a lot of stuff happening every day, even though the days are not packed with program. Me myself, I hate being indoors a whole day. I have to go out, even if it's only for a walk. I don't like to be alone either, and so far I have not been alone with the baby much. I try to plan something to do every day in order not to go crazy. But. Forget about being on time anywhere. Just when you are about to step outside the door, she will demand food or attention. You have no other choice then to sit down and give her what she needs and then try again when she's finished. I hate being late so this is really something I had to accept.

It's all really about expectations. When I expect that I will be somewhere 2 pm or I will do laundry and it does not happen as I wish, I get stressed. But when I do the best I can, with the situation I have at hand, I feel so much better. Keeping your expectations low and accepting every situation makes my mind feel so much better. I can have some initial idea of what to do every day, but if it does not happen the way I imagined, I try to accept it and move on. Seems like an easy thing to do, but it's not when I like to be in control.

Lastly, time flies when you become a parent. Almost 6 weeks and it feels like 2 or 3 weeks. She grows so fast and I really want to try and capture the time as well as I can.


Have a great day,

Maria

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Good Evening. I have now felt the urge to write more again about my life and ideas that come to my mind. Excuse my low activity. I've had several topics pop into my head the last few days and it's time I give blogging yet another chance😄

Today we went on our first trip with Jasmine. A car trip to Seinäjoki to watch a football game. Jasmine was sleeping the whole car ride. She really loves the car and falls asleep quickly. When we came to the field, Jasmine showed me her best side.

You could say that she is a bit of a dream baby. She was so calm, sat in my lap and looked around the whole time. She ate a few times but never screamed during those three hours. Everybody was in awe over the "easy" baby I was having. I was even pleasantly surprised myself. Now on our way home, she is staying quiet in her car seat and I feel like I am exploding with love and pride.

There were many lovely and nice women watching the football game. One wonderful woman was sharing stories of her four kids and tried to make me talk about my experiences. Every new mom needs extra support in the beginning and I loved the fact that she had made it her mission to ease first-time mothers' minds.

Now, today is actually Tuesday 😅 Jasmine had a small breakdown on the way home and I did not put time on finishing this post before now. Hope you all had a good start to your week.

Well wishes,
Maria

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Hello 👋

So my baby decided to arrive on the 14th of July, within 48 hours  after I drank a few cups of raspberry leaf tea. The labour was a bit of a shock, and ended in a c-section. Now I have focused on getting used to a new life with a baby, as well as getting healed from the surgery.

I will soon tell you more about everything. I can tell you that our daughter was very good today. She slept 2-3 hour long naps while we were doing errands. So impressed!👏💕

Have a good night!

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So I have yet not gone full mom-mode since my baby seems to like it too much inside my belly. But I've been thinking a lot about what it means to be a mom and how my everyday life will look like in a near future.

One thing that has helped me to prepare is to listen to other people's experiences. I have several friends who have had babies recently, and I take any opportunity to ask about anything I am wondering about. I also have found help in several groups on facebook. I read peoples' posts about hard times or difficulties and what people respond to them. I find it very helpful to understand that it won't be easy, and everybody faces different challenges throughout the child's life. It's also good to know that you can get real help and advice through social media if you need it.

I do trust my instincts and I think I will, without problem, be able to take care of my baby. It will likely be a bit more challenging than I can imagine right now, but for now I am feeling positive. I will only understand motherhood when I am facing it myself. One thing is for sure, it will be the most life-changing experience I will ever have.

One thing I have been thinking about is how soon do I want to return to work and/or hobbies. The right time for that depends on my physical and mental condition but also on an active decision I will make. Sometimes I feel that women that go back to work / or start living their life "like before" very quickly are celebrated a lot. "Look at her, she is already back here, she is awesome, she has it all!" Pregnant women that are able to exercise, do normal things and live life without issues are also celebrated more than those that are restricted because of the pregnancy.

My point is that every woman makes her own decisions on when it's time to get active again or how active you are during your pregnancy. Nothing should be celebrated more than the other. If you choose to rest or if you choose to dance every week, that's your decision and your choice is equally important. If you choose to stay home for a long time with your baby instead of returning to your "old" life, that should be equally celebrated as the one that started exercising two months after giving birth.

I do want to capture the time I will be given to take care of my baby, not stress and return to work when I feel best. Life is full of new surprises every day and I think you will survive it best if you are willing to adapt to changes in a calm way, finding your own way out.

Have a great day :)

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Hello again.

I hava taken an unwilling break from blogging for a little bit over a month.

In this time I have moved from Stockholm, started my vacation and maternity leave, moved into my new home and concentrated on taking care of stuff for the baby. Now I am settled down again, with a beautiful home and more time. It feels good to be back in Finland, even though my days are very slow and I don't do that much in a day. I am resting a lot and waiting on the baby.

The last two weeks of my work I started working 75%, since my body was too tired to work 100%. The move itself went good, it was a long weekend before we arrived back in Vaasa from Stockholm.

Now I will try to blog more often, and let you interested in my life take part!


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Social media and internet is said to have destroyed human relationships and interaction. But when I compare my mom's experience with my own, I am very happy that I am becoming a mom in 2017 and not 1992.

My mom was pretty much on her own when she had me. She did not know others around her with the same experience. She did it all on her own.

The amount of support you can find on social media is insane. There are tons of facebook groups where you can ask any questions. You can google if you need. You can always find someone who has experienced something similar like you and find relief. It's tricky to be a mom and I believe you need a lot of support. Fortunately I also have close friends with babies so I will have people around me. But if I did not have them, I know internet would be my go-to support line.

Breastfeeding is a good example. It can be difficult to get it going and learn the technique. My mom only breastfed me 1 month and my little sister for 3 months. If she would have had internet and facebook groups about breastfeeding. she might have breastfed us longer, but in her situation it did not last longer than that.

We also have blogs and youtube and when you are a part of such a global movement as the internet, you get more educated. Some people only show the "pretty" picture to social media and that can easily put pressure on yourself to be perfect. I find that during the last few years, more and more moms show the real picture and tell you that you are enough and you don't have to be perfect to be a good mom. Empowering each other over internet is very important and makes us all grow together. Knowledge is power.

2017 or 1992, babies will be babies and every experience will be a bit different. To quote my mom "I did it on my own, but I did it damn well! "

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Today we enter week 33! The baby is almost 2 kg and the head is already facing downwards. Everything is fine with me and the baby, except that my hemoglobin level isn't rising according to expectations.

Working has been challenging lately. I suffer from tiredness, contractions, ligament pains, hip ache and nausea. I went to the doctor who gave me 25% sick leave, which means I will be working two hours less each day. And it's really necessary, I am completely exhausted today after 6 hours of work.


"Over 90% of babies born in the 33d week of pregnancy survive, so if the reality of a person in your womb hasn’t sunk in yet, it really should soon." This is what one of my pregnancy apps is saying. It really is a person inside, so cool! 

The time for my maternity leave is almost here! I am both excited and sad about it. I have to leave a great city and awesome friends but I get to move and prepare for the baby and be around awesome people back home. One part of me will always be in Stockholm. Whether or not I come back to Sweden is a question that needs to be solved in the future. But for now I feel calm knowing I will have a great support system around me in Vaasa. I can't believe I'm about to be a mom! 😅

Now I am just hoping that the little one will stay inside my belly until at least week 36, so I can give birth in Finland ❤

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Finally I had a day off from work and could take it easy with my mom. We started the day with a nice breakfast and watching the ice hockey game.

We later went into town and took a trip to Sephora, ate ice cream in the sun and looked through books at Adlibris store. My body is really starting to limit me now. Walking even a short distance makes my lower abdomen ache and I feel a lot of pressure in my belly.

Three generations in one picture :)

I bought a highlighter (too faced) and a liquid lipstick (kat von D) from Sephora. Later we watched Talent Sweden and Eurovision Song Contest. The time right now is all about counting down the days and trying to fill them with something fun.

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Everybody talks about pregnancy as a glorious time in your life. Everything is perfect and nice and cute and everybody want to share the joy of the baby with you.

What about those days you are scared to interact with people because you either feel like killing them or bursting into tears? What about those days where you get annoyed by absolutely everything and everyone? What about those days where your body is hurting and it's difficult to move? What about all the fun events you want to go to and friends you want to meet but your body tells you no? What about when you don't want your mood to affect others but it does anyway because you cannot help it?

For me today: what about when I pushed myself yesterday to make proper food when I haven't been able to do that all week (too tired, exhausted etc) with low blood sugar cause I didn't eat since 4 pm,  I pack a nice lunch for me to take to work and today I FORGET THE LUNCH BOX AT HOME? I just can't deal...

Pregnancy hormones are a real pain in the ass. And unless you have experienced a pregnancy before, you have no say. No "stop worrying" , "stop crying so much", "just smile" and my personal favorite "everything will be fine". Thank you all, now I have stopped doing all that and I am sure my future will be so fine and good, you just removed all my worries with your magical words.

Pregnancy hormones got me like....

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There are a lot of ways to compare life. This "life is like a road" has been on my mind a lot the past few days. Let me explain what I mean.

The whole thing starts with a perfect comparison I got from a friend when I was in Belgium two years ago. I was asking for advice because I didn't know what to do on one thing. She said that if you walk along a road and you know when you are going, you will walk there without thinking of it, because you know where you are headed and what you want. You will take the straightest route and not think about all of the other roads. But if you walk down the road and you don't know what your end destination is, you will walk aimlessly, getting distracted by other roads, things you see or people. Your road is all of a sudden more inconsistent and you are likely to go places that you didn't plan to go or even wanted to go. She was trying to say "Think about what you want and don't get distracted by others. (Thanks Fenella for this excellent advice ❤)

I was thinking about this as well when I took the wrong bus two days ago (pregnancy brain) and had to walk home a much longer route, with hills that were hard to walk and dead ends. Sometimes you might end up on the wrong road, with new signs and challenges ahead. Even if you see the sign of "dead end" you still don't believe it and after trying to walk there you discover that yes, this was indeed a dead end. Now you get to walk back a bit to stay on route.

The beautiful thing is that you even if this was not the way you intended to walk, you still find your way home. It might take you longer and be a bit trickier. But at the same time you got to see new places, new houses, new signs and new ways of achieving the same goal.

The last thing I want to say that even though it's great to know what you want, sometimes we are lost in life and we cannot listen inwards to what we want. That's the time when it can be good to wander aimlessly. Just walk around and see new things. You might discover some new wonderful place that you would never have seen before. You might get new ideas and inpressions and all of sudden you have a new goal, a new destination that is better suited for you then you could even imagine.

Life is like a road.

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