This is a confession: I won't write anymore.

I won't write again for a long time. I'm going away for a while. They say is good for the soul when there's no soul in sight.

There will always be things we dislike about ourselves. Whether it is the way we react in certain situations when we wish we reacted differently, or the things we say as we had no filter sometimes, or the way we feel about others when we know is wrong to feel such way.

Like when we hurt or become hurt, for example. I like to think people who hurt others (people, animals, nature...) in some way are missing something of their own. Something inside is missing, maybe something they grew up with or something they lacked. I believe such void can be filled with compassion and love. People deserve to be given a second chance at life. Sometimes, people who destroy wished they could build. No one believes in them for the same reason they don't believe in themselves. Wether it is a feeling of loneliness or abandon, a feeling of frustration or lack of love... some people have lived life believing they're not deserving of good, therefore what's the point in believing in myself, they say.

I like to believe people are capable of being their best version, if they can imagine it, if they can see it. But I also like to think we must make mistakes in order to get to know ourselves better and understand our true meaning in life. And it will hurt sometimes when you see someone you love, or someone you don't even know, hurting others. You know they're hurting themselves too, only they don't know it yet. But we all must walk different paths to understand why life works in mysterious ways, and so sometimes all we can do is love and forgive. People learn sooner or later how to fight their own battles and be at peace.

Humans are a rare thing.


"To meet someone who really hurts you, is to meet a rare and precious treasure. Hold that person in high esteem, and make full use of the opportunity to eradicate your defects and make progress on the path. If you cannot yet feel love an compassion for those who treat you badly, it is a sign that your mind has not fully transformed, and that you need to keep working on it with increased application."

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Picture this. The years from now, you're sitting in a big house, all white picket fence and porch swings. Ten years ago you swore you'd be living in a big city with her by your side but something happened along the way and you watched as those plans desintegrated in the palms of your hands. You watch the sunrise and you watch the sunset and you wonder if she's somewhere on the other side of the planet like she promised. " I gotta get out of here", she said, "it doesn't matter how I do it or where I go, I'm getting out".

Picture this. Twenty years from now, you find your first grey hair. You dutifully have that middle aged panic attack that everyone seems obliged to have and you screw up your eyes and pull it out. Your life is pretty steady now: good, calm, like you've finally figured things out. "I'm getting old", you grumble. And somewhere, at the back of your mind, you wonder if she's getting old too.

Picture this. Fifty years from now, your hair is like snow (if you have any, that is). Your walking stick is your new best friend and memories seem to flit in and out of your head like clouds in the sky. Most days you can't remember what you had for breakfast or what you'll have for tea, and somedays it's beginning to hurt to breathe. It's on these occasions, when your chest is heavy and you have to sit down, that you remember her. You think how true it is that you don't forget the people you loved when you were young. You may not remember yesterday's weather but you remember the fifty year old summer breeze and complaining about her hair in your face. "I wonder if she's happy", you say, and people mistake it as mindless rambling. "I hope she found what she was looking for".

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Some people survive and talk about it. Some people survive and go silent. Some people survive and create. Everyone deals with unimaginable pain in their own way, and everyone is entitled to that, without judgement. So the next time you look at someone's life covetously, remember... you may not want to endure what they're enduring right now, at this moment, whilst they sit so quietly before you, looking like a calm ocean on a sunny day. Remember how vast the ocean's boundaries are. Whilst somewhere the water is calm, in another place in the same ocean, there is a colossal storm.

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For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.

Eric Roth

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I took some time to write myself some advice.

1. Travel

You have very little responsibility so go and travel. When you get to 30, you’re going to want to travel slightly differently, spend a little more, do slightly more expensive things, eat at slightly better restaurants. So work for a year and save enough money to experience the world on the cheap.

How do you know what you want to do if you don’t know what’s out there to do?

Don’t just travel to the obvious places.
Travel to the tough places.
Travel to learn.
Travel to discover.
Travel to the places that will challenge who you think you want to be.
2. Build things

Don’t spend too much time working on other people’s visions or in other people’s meetings. Spend time figuring out what your own world view is (see point 1) and where you want to take your own life.

Meetings are where ideas go to die.

If you find yourself in a corporate job that you wish you could leave then do it. Leave. If you don’t have a corporate job yet see point 5.

3. Read

Read every day. Read everything you can. Don’t just read about things you know about. Read about people. Read people.

4. Stop watching television

Right now. Stop it. It’s not helping you get better at anything.

5. Career

Do not take that corporate job. Just don’t do it (see point 2).


6. Trust

Even if it kills your relationships. Even if it destroys your ideas. Even if you lose your friends. Even if it means you end up getting hurt.

Trust people until they give you a reason not to.

But don’t be naïve. Some people are out to fuck you.

7. People

People are the best and worst thing that will happen to you. Some will help you go further, faster. Others will pull you down to their level and help you lose. Most are OK. Many are average. Some are excellent.

A few people will change your life forever. Find them.

You don’t need a lot of friends or people around you. You need amazing people who do for you as you do for them.

It’s simple really, a lot of average friends will leave you feeling alone when you need to feel surrounded by people who care.

8. Value time

Don’t waste time on people who you don’t trust. Don’t waste time with lovers who cheat on you. Don’t waste time with friends who don’t treat you the way you treat them (see point 7).

Do not be late.

Value other people’s time. That means that if you’re late, you don’t give a shit about them or their time and that you think you’re worth more and therefore can keep them waiting.

Some people will tell you that it’s OK to be late. It’s not. Some people will tell you that it’s just the way they are. Then you need to reevaluate them (see point 7 above).

9. Fail

Fail a lot. Fail often. Fail at love. Fail at sex. Fail at socialising. Fail at making friends. Fail at work. Fail at business. Fail with family. Fail with existing friends.

Fail. But do it quickly and learn a lesson.

If you don’t learn something every time you fail then all you’ve done is failed. If you learn something, then you’ve grown. Every time you grow and learn and fail, you get better at figuring out how the hell to succeed.

10. Success

There is no point at which you will have succeeded. Not in your twenties. Not ever.

Get over that fact and start building things (see point 2 and combine with point 9).

11. Patience

Be patient. Nothing worth doing is worth doing quickly. Nothing worth building is worth building in a rush. Nothing of value is formed in a minute.

Plan in decades. Think in years. Work in months. Live in days.

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