In the beginning of the year I went to Stockholm with my mother. She worked almost all day, which meant that I had all day alone to go wherever I wanted and do whatever I wanted. I visited many of the more central parts of the city, including the old town. I found some really cozy, smaller shops there, with souvenirs, jewellery and comics.

Just look at all those comics?? I never were into reading comics, I really prefer books, but I have to admit that this was really cool. They had everything - the X-men, the walking dead, batman and whatever other comics there are, i don't know... After this I sat down in a café for a while, still in the old town. I ordered a coffee and wrote about my day in my notebooks as I watched people pass by outside. Tom Rosenthal were in my headphones and filled me with joy and calmed me down <33

A couple of posters that looked cool nearby Slussen. (I even stole one with the 1975 because the concert I were supposed to go to in February got cancelled, so I felt that I at least deserved a poster, right??)

THIS, my friends, is the view from my bedroom window in the apartment that we borrowed. So cool to watch the sun set from there.

A cool cat on a wall.



Written in my notebook, 13th January:

I want to draw on my body. I want every moment to be documented on me, with permanent ink. I never want to forget. I want to take amazing photos that scream "I'm free and I'm climbing trees" as loud as anyone can ever imagine.

My poetry is supposed to sound like a dream and leave people speechless. It is supposed to be about real life, but sound like paradise. I want everyone to read it. I want everyone to wish reality was just like that. I want people to see my thoughts, feel my feelings and understand my arguments with myself. Those I keep in my head. I want it to be written on my forehead that I am hard to get to know. That I am shy and quiet. But at the same time I want people to tell me I am not.

I want my life to be just like the life of a five years old, living on the country side with dirty feet and scars from adventure. My feet wants to be hard and dirty too, just like theirs, so that I can run like a child, barefoot, without looking like a cat walking on fire. I want to fall and hurt my chin, cry and then laugh.

I am not supposed to sleep in the middle of the night. I am supposed to be awake, create art, the best I've ever made. I am supposed to go outside in the night, when I can have it as my own. I like the darkness because it keeps me hidden and it makes me feel grown up. I only like that kind of grown up. Grown up on the inside, hidden grown up.

I want to be awake late and drink tea in a sea of glitter. I want to feel like the life I am living is a life just exactly as the life I want to live and I want it to be long and exhausting but at the same time relaxing. I want to die happy, alone or with any other person, I don't mind. I don't want to mind. I want to live, only that.