Next to your sweet there's a bitter bitter

So I spent like 30 min on the board and the text etc and maybe 20 on the overall layout. When I was happy about it I just had to post it on Instagram. Since my mother like to decor the flat a lot, I had quite a lot of props to use to make the picture a little more interesting. I love doing these sort of things, especially with different quotes!

Maybe it could have turned out a little better but I enjoyed it anyways! What you think?

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Why do I feel so incredibly unmotivated to anything at all. I have a shit ton of stuff I want to do, like reading up on a lot of books I've been planning to read, finish some series, continue writing. Yet everytime I try to engage myself in these tasks I feel stressed and frustrated, it pisses me off.

School starts in 2 weeks and while I'm a little excited to meet my friends and learn new things, I also feel anxious that this will get worse. My whole summer vacation has been spent lazing around doing almost nothing, I don't regret it per se since I quite enjoy being at home and taking it easy. I still feel so conflicted that's it's soon over and I need to get a routine back, which I won't be able to. I will stay up late, only get a few hours of sleep and be moody and tired the whole day, that's just how my school days has been the last 2 or 3 years. I want to focus on school, do my homework correctly, be interested and put down hard work on it, but I feel almost physically incapable of doing so.

And the worst thing is that I know this won't go away without doing something about it, and that's where the vicious circle begins.



Hello, been a few days since I last posted and in all honesty there's not much to update you on. I had fun with my friend last week, we went shopping too and so I got some new clothes. We also watched the new Spiderman movie and I kinda liked it. Tom Holland is the cutest spiderman so far, albeit extemely awkward. I'm hoping to see more of him as spiderman.

I went to see a movie with my dad and brother last friday, "Atomic Blonde". It was a MI6 spy film that took place in Berlin during the cold war, when Berlin was split up as West and Wast Berlin. In my opinion it was thrilling enough to get you hooked, maybe not something I'd like to see several times in a short time but not boring either. Entertaining enough.

I also ordered a new phone last week! My old one was almost three years old and it had definitely started to show. Since I worked a few weeks this summer, I had money to afford it. It came here yesterday and I really like it, it's a Huawei Honor 8 and I chose a white one. I even got a transparent case with it. Overall it's a great phone, it looks a lot like the iPhone except for a few features. It's android though. I'm happy with it and it's a serious step up from my last one.

Other than that, not much has happened.



Another day arrives, this one with a special treat. Today a friend of mine from school is coming over! She's staying until tomorrow, since we live a bit far away from each other. I just woke up and I'm gonna take a shower and eat some breakfast before I'm meeting her at the station, the train arrives at 10.40-ish.

We're going to this international food market that's being held in the neighboring town, although a friend who had been there yesterday said it wasn't all that great. Otherwise we'll just roam some stores and go eat somewhere else.

Then the whole evening will be filled with movie marathons, snacks and drinks! We haven't decided on what movies we wanna watch but we have pretty similar taste so hopefully it'll go smoothly!

Don't have much more to say, maybe I'll post later if something happens.



Hellooo, decided to post a very late post but whatever.

Today has been pretty good actually. I went to a friend's house for a couple of hours and we literally just talked for the whole time, those friendships really are the best cause there's no pressure to keep the conversations flowing or anything like that. We're both very alike in terms of the way we think and feel, it gives the relationship a comforting aura.

I had to make pancakes for myself today and to my surprise I only had to throw out one of the five I did! I am excruciatingly terrible at making pancakes, every time I try to do it they just end up in the bin or they turn into scrambled pancakes. It's a weakness of mine.

Anyways, they did turn out good this time and let me just say that I was slightly proud of myself. Small victories is the only victories in my life lately, but I have and will continue to enjoy them just as much!

I also played some sims for a couple of hours. I bought it of off Origin a few months back when they had a sale on it, The Sims4 that is. Haven't played a lot but it's kinda fun to do when you have time to pass, at least 2 hours.

Me and my friend also discussed which the best Spiderman is. A lot of people I've met, both online and in person, think the 2002 Tobey Maguire version is the best but I can't stand it. It's so incredibly boring and Peter (Tobey M.) has the same facial expression throughout the whole movie, it just doesn't intrigue me at all. Then we have the 2012 Andrew Garfield version, in my opinion the better one. Andrew portrays Peter in a much better sense, he's awkward and quiet as Peter but when he gets the powers he also builds up a little confidence. In this version there's also more focus on Peter's photographing, since that is a major characteristic of Peter Parker.

Although forgive me if I don't mention a lot of details of the 2002 version, it was quite a while since I've seen it but I doubt I'll change my mind about it.

One huge blunder they made though in the 2012 version is, in my opinion, that they replaced MJ with "Gwen". Mary-Jane should be the one and only female interest in a Spiderman movie, Gwen just felt wrong and kinda out of place. She wasn't a bad character per se, but I was a bit disappointed.

I'm excited to see how the new one is gonna be. Hopefully it won't be terrible but I'm pretty easy to please actually.

Bye for now.



Hello, I didn't write yesterday cause I didn't felt for it. Anyways, as planned, me and my family went on a trip into town yesterday. We actually went to a park first, where my sister could run around on the playground. The park really consists of a zoo, although at the same time it's not really a zoo; literally just an animal park. They have horses, goats, sheep, pigs, hens and a few birds. You can even pet some of the animals, I went there quite often as a child though I thought it was a lot more exciting back then than I do now. It was a nice way to pass some time, the weather was gorgeous albeit a tad hot so it felt like you were melting away...

My sister liked it, so it was worth the extra sweatiness.

After the park we went to a store to buy an inflatable mattress, since a friend of mine is staying over on Thursday next week. We also got a bicycle helmet for my sister, since she got a bike on her birthday; the kind where you push yourself forward and has no pedals.

Today I'm going to my dad, my parents are divorced but since they both live in the same town still I live switch between them every week. A bit of a hassle sometimes but I'm used to it.

Have a good day.



Me, my mom and my siblings went to a forest trail where my sister could run around a bit. She has so much energy and because the daycare is closed for the summer there's not much activity going on, therefore not using it up. It's quite frustrating when it takes my mom almost 2 hours just to night her.

We got home, took showers and now everyone's just lazing around. Lil sis watching a movie and I'm scrolling through tumblr. It's nice to just do nothing actually.



After the quite hectic day yesterday I need a lazy day. We had been thinking of going into town today, need to buy some stuff, but decided against it; going tomorrow instead.

At least the celebration was a success, people enjoyed the cakes we had made and even the ones which I slightly burned. My little sister got some new toys, including a bike from her godparents. She loved the both tea sets she got, one from my mother and the other from my aunt. She's been playing with them all morning. I got her a water gun, as previously stated, and she really liked it. The gun's a tiny bit too big for her hands so she has to hold it in one hand while pressing the trigger with the other. She thinks it's hilarious to shoot at us, practically squealing with joy.

Now I'm thinking of either watching a movie or continue on one of the many series I start watching but never complete.



Good morning, I wanted to sleep longer but today's schedule didn't let me. My little sister turns 2 this day so we're having some guests over to celebrate. Yesterday me and my mom made a carrot cake and two sets of macroons. Yes, two. The first one failed completely, at least in technicality, they were just hollow shells. We filled them with buttercream and they tasted quite good anyways. I had some coloring in it, to make them pink. We had a few guests over today already because they couldn't attend tomorrow's celebration. Therefore quite a lot of the pink macroons had been eaten, so I decided to make another set on the evening. Also to test if the result would be better if I lowered the heat and used a second layer of bakery paper, so that they wouldn't rise too fast.

It worked a bit, although they weren't the best either. They instead didn't get cooked all the way through, leaving the macroons soggy and unbaked. I gave up on one sheet of them, because they couldn't be saved. Then I also burned one sheet, I called them the crunchy edition. That sheet of macroons looked like they've been tanning, sporting a golden brown color, unlike the others ones who were a pale creamy color.

Needless to say I was pretty done after the whole thing.

This morning we're going to make Banoffée pie, it's amazing but I won't bother explaining what it is at the moment. Google is your friend if you wanna know what it is.

Hopefully today won't be as exhausting as I know it probably will be. Sometimes even the pessimistic people want to feel optimistic.

Also, I bought a water gun for my little sis. I think she's gonna like it, judging from home she blasted me with another one yesterday.



Books, the love of my life. I've been a reading maniac since way back, I can't remember when I first fell for a book. Nowadays I read a shit ton of fanfiction, cause there's just too many series/movies/books where the people I want to fall in love never do. I've come across some really beautiful works that's been next to better then the original storyline, they've been planned out and the author takes the readers through a real journey. There's a lot of fanfiction that's rubbish too, they simply don't make sense or the actual writing sucks. I cannot tell you enough how important it is, for me at least, that the author checks grammar and spelling before publishing. I myself have tried on writing a few times, I've started three stories but as I developed as a writer and matured as a person I had to put one of them down. It didn't excite me to work on it anymore, and since that's the core of writing anything at all - that you enjoy doing it - the meaning of it kinda died.

The two other fics that I started is still alive, alas I oftentimes have trouble to continue it because of a constant writers block. The thing that keeps me going is that the few times where I get ideas and have the energy to write, I feel excited and motivated to continue. Writing and reading is therapy for me, I cannot go a day without something to read; something to escape into. The fantasy genre has been my biggest interest ever since I started reading. Worlds with creatures you can only dream of, magic, societies that hold extraordinary people, those people may hold abilities which you wish you had. The characters are set out on a journey to find an old magical object that can save their world, or suddenly they wake up with strange powers. I just love how unrealistic it actually is but how at the same time, the author has made these things real, they do exist - at least for them and the readers. As an author you hold the power to unleash great dangers or portray hidden messages that only the most captivated readers see. You can save lives with mere words.

Some might think it's ridiculous to believe that books hold any meaning, especially those filled with magic and flying creatures. I can agree that not everyone likes to read or books in general, but many hasn't given the authors a thought. What an amazing mind you've got to possess if you can create whole worlds, species and societies with just imagination.

I think a lot of people miss so many beautiful creations because of their lack of reading.

Gonna end this here, I can go on forever on how much I love books.