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Next to your sweet there's a bitter bitter

Hiya, as the title says I've been feeling good actually the past week. Nothing out of the ordinary nor any low moods. We did have that event in school though last Friday where we sold food on a town square. It was really fun even with the stress and limited space, we had a smaller tent. Other than that it's been the usual stuff like school, guitar lessons, lazing off in my room and doing absolutely nothing. Fun times.

A really short update this time, don't have anything to write about.

Maybe I'll do another book rant soon.

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Yet another week has passed and as usual, the weekend was far too short. Tomorrow it's back to school and I'm stuck in the same old routine. Yesterday I woke up at 5.40 and was frantic as to why my alarm hadn't rang. I was so certain that I was going to school that I didn't even think about what day it was, I remember thinking that I knew it had been Friday the day before but I couldn't figure out what day comes after Friday. Is it just me or is this kinda bad? I feel like I'm just living on autopilot and relying on muscle memory to get me through the weeks.

I hate waking up early, taking the one hour long bus ride to a place where I quite frankly don't want to be at. The only thing that makes school somewhat interesting is my friends, since we live quite far away from each other the only time we really hang out is in school.

It feels like my mood affect the weather cause it's just been raining and raining lately.

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I'm terrible at keeping this up. Although not much fascinating has happened the last week either. To do a quick recap;

I had my first class in Swedish SIgn Language last Monday. It was fun but since it was the first time we only talked about what sign language really is. We did get a homework, kind of, to learn the alphabet and how to sign our names. It's easy enough that it only took me a few hours to learn it. I really look forward to this curriculum because I've been interested in sign language for a long time. Maybe in the future I'll try to learn other sign languages too.

I got my new rings for my septum piercing. One retainer in plastic and an infinity ring with a hinge. Although I had to wait a few days more for the hinged one because it was out of stock. Since I wasn't allowed to have my previous jewelry during ktichen and serving classes in school, I had to take it out and put in the retainer. I couldn't do it myself though so my mother helped me. It hurt a little but only because I think I have a small inflammation on one side, it doesn't hurt and I'm not particularly worried about it.
The retainer is super comfortable and so easy to just flip up into my nose and bam it's gone! It doesn't show at all, which you might think is boring but it's really convenient.

I also had my first guitar lesson of the term. It was fun to be back and start on something special, not just me strumming on random songs when I'm bored. Mentioning that, I was pretty bored today so I learnt how to play Sam Cooke's 'Bring it on home to me'. I love soul music, it's so nice to sing. I got into the mood after watching Dirty Dancing yesterday, which is a fabulous movie. If you haven't seen it, you have missed something; BIG TIME.

Tomorrow is Monday and it's back to school. Although I don't have many classes on Mondays so I think it'll be fine. I just hate getting up so early in the morning.

I'm gonna try to post more frequently but to be honest, there's not much people reading so I don't really know what to write.

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So, school started this week and so far so good. It's a pain in the ass to get up at 5.30 am but I'll just have to suck it up. All we've done so far is mostly preparing for tomorrow because we're having this activity day for the 1st years in my program. As second years, our class will be having different stations were you have to do an activity. My group specifically will be having a memory game, you know, show them stuff on a tray and then cover it all up with a cloth and the ones playing need to tick off as many items they can remember. Other groups in my class will be doing a water balloon game where you throw them between each other as the distance increases, another is that the contestants have to build a tower with blocks on limited time and they get points for how high it is. There will also be a game where you search for paper clips in the grass with a cone on your face that limit your view, a game where you throw a ball between each other, another where you throw rings at poles to get points and at last a quiz walk.

The third years are going to make our lunch, a threecourse, and they will also be serving us. I'm looking forward to it cause I was a 1st year last summer and I thought it was a little fun. Although I'm most excited for the food!

On the downside of this, it's probably gonna rain and that'll ruin it all.

I also ordered, or my mom did, some new rings for my septum piercing. I'm not allowed to wear the one I have now when we're serving in our school's restaurant so I have to get new ones. I chose a retainer in plastic that I can flip up in my nose to keep it hidden when I need it to be and also a steel hinged segment ring that I can use on a daily basis. It's frustrating but I can't do anything about it so...

Overall, this first few days has been okay, fun even sometimes.

Now I really need to sleep cause I'm getting up in like 7 hours...

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Hiya, I had a pretty great day today. I met a friend I haven't seen in a while, we spent 5 hours at a mc donalds and just talked. Well, ate and talked. It was fun cause we had a lot to discuss and overall had a good time. The weather sucked though, it rained the whole day and only held up for less then 10 minutes a few times.

I also took up a story that I had put on hiatus some months ago, so I've been editing the chapters that were posted and generally correcting stuff like grammar and spellings. I have a chapter that's almost ready to be posted, just need a few paragraphs more to tie it up.

School starts on tuesday and I'm not ready to get up at 5.30 in the morning...

It'll be fun to meet some people again and the first week will probably be a bit interesting cause I have new courses this year and I don't really know what to expect.

Hopefully I'll survive.

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So I spent like 30 min on the board and the text etc and maybe 20 on the overall layout. When I was happy about it I just had to post it on Instagram. Since my mother like to decor the flat a lot, I had quite a lot of props to use to make the picture a little more interesting. I love doing these sort of things, especially with different quotes!

Maybe it could have turned out a little better but I enjoyed it anyways! What you think?

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Why do I feel so incredibly unmotivated to anything at all. I have a shit ton of stuff I want to do, like reading up on a lot of books I've been planning to read, finish some series, continue writing. Yet everytime I try to engage myself in these tasks I feel stressed and frustrated, it pisses me off.

School starts in 2 weeks and while I'm a little excited to meet my friends and learn new things, I also feel anxious that this will get worse. My whole summer vacation has been spent lazing around doing almost nothing, I don't regret it per se since I quite enjoy being at home and taking it easy. I still feel so conflicted that's it's soon over and I need to get a routine back, which I won't be able to. I will stay up late, only get a few hours of sleep and be moody and tired the whole day, that's just how my school days has been the last 2 or 3 years. I want to focus on school, do my homework correctly, be interested and put down hard work on it, but I feel almost physically incapable of doing so.

And the worst thing is that I know this won't go away without doing something about it, and that's where the vicious circle begins.


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Hello, been a few days since I last posted and in all honesty there's not much to update you on. I had fun with my friend last week, we went shopping too and so I got some new clothes. We also watched the new Spiderman movie and I kinda liked it. Tom Holland is the cutest spiderman so far, albeit extemely awkward. I'm hoping to see more of him as spiderman.

I went to see a movie with my dad and brother last friday, "Atomic Blonde". It was a MI6 spy film that took place in Berlin during the cold war, when Berlin was split up as West and Wast Berlin. In my opinion it was thrilling enough to get you hooked, maybe not something I'd like to see several times in a short time but not boring either. Entertaining enough.

I also ordered a new phone last week! My old one was almost three years old and it had definitely started to show. Since I worked a few weeks this summer, I had money to afford it. It came here yesterday and I really like it, it's a Huawei Honor 8 and I chose a white one. I even got a transparent case with it. Overall it's a great phone, it looks a lot like the iPhone except for a few features. It's android though. I'm happy with it and it's a serious step up from my last one.

Other than that, not much has happened.

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Another day arrives, this one with a special treat. Today a friend of mine from school is coming over! She's staying until tomorrow, since we live a bit far away from each other. I just woke up and I'm gonna take a shower and eat some breakfast before I'm meeting her at the station, the train arrives at 10.40-ish.

We're going to this international food market that's being held in the neighboring town, although a friend who had been there yesterday said it wasn't all that great. Otherwise we'll just roam some stores and go eat somewhere else.

Then the whole evening will be filled with movie marathons, snacks and drinks! We haven't decided on what movies we wanna watch but we have pretty similar taste so hopefully it'll go smoothly!

Don't have much more to say, maybe I'll post later if something happens.

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