AM I LUCKY? YES INDEED, CAUSE I HAVE TWO HOMES AND BOTH HOMES ARE FILLED WITH LOVE. HOWEVER, HAVING TWO HOMES BOTH FILLED WITH PERSONS YOU LOVE MORE THAN ANYTHING AND THE TWO HOMES BEING FAR FAR AWAY FROM EACH OTHER CAN CAUSE AN INNER CONFLICT, WHEN BEING ONE PERSON, ONLY BEING ABLE TO BE AT ONE PLACE AT A TIME.

MY MOM ONCE TOLD ME "IN EVERY CHOICE YOU WILL MAKE IN LIFE THERE WILL BE A SACRIFICE OR A CONSEQUENCE OF YOUR CHOICE. " I AGREE WITH HER. WHEN I HAD TO GO BACK HOME TO DENMARK FOR THE SECOND TIME I KNEW THAT MY HEART WAS GOING TO BE TORNED, WHILE I WAS MORE THAN HAPPY TO SEE MY FAMILY IN DENMARK AND BEING ABLE TO HUG AND KISS MY PARENTS, SISTERS AND FRIENDS, I WAS HAVING AN INNER PAIN, MISSING AND THINKING OF THE PERSON WHOM I LOVED BUT COULDN'T BE WITH. A CONSTANT BATLLE BETWEEN HAPPINESS AND SADNESS. HOWEVER, I WAS IN FAMILIER SURRONDINGS, I HAD A GREAT JOB AND FAMILY AND FRIENDS AROUND ME, I WAS CONFIDENT IN MY ACTIONS AND BELEIFES - THE ONLY THING MISSING WAS OMI.

NOW IT IS THE OTHER WAY AROUND. LIVING WITH THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, FILLED WITH LOVE AND KINDNESS, BUT HAVING TO LIVE WITH THE PAIN OF MISSING AND THINKING OF MY FAMILY, FRIENDS AND NETWORK IN DENMARK. AND WHILE BEING IN A COUNTRY, WHICH STILL SEEMS FOREIGN TO ME IN MANY WAYS, AS THE CULTURE AND LIVING AND MOST OF ALL MINDSET, IS FAR FROM WHAT I HAVE BEEN BROUGHT UP IN AND LIVED IN FOR 21 YEARS , I SOMETIMES FIND IT HARD TO FIND MY PLACE AND VOICE IN ALL THE FEELINGS AND INPUTS THAT COMES MY WAY. IT IS LIKE HAVING A HEART THAT IS NEVER COMPLETE. EITHER WAY, BIG PARTS OF ME WILL BE MISSING.

I HAVE FOUND IT HARD TO FIND MY WAY IN MAURITIUS, WHILE DEALING WITH INNER CONFLICTS ASWELL.

FOREIGN LANGUAGE ALL AROUND YOU. WE SPEAK ENGLISH HERE, BUT THE LOCALS PREFER FRENCH OR CREOLE. SO BEING WITH MANY PEOPLE SOMETIMES CAN FEEL VERY OVERWHELMING AS YOU ONLY GET BITS AND PIECES AND MOSTLY OBSERVING. SO WHEN YOU ARE USED TO JUST SPEAK THE HELL OUT YOUR MOUTH UNTIL YOUR THROAT IS SOAR AND NOW HAVE TO CONSTANTLY LISTEN VERY CLOSELY AND TRANSLATING IN YOUR HEAD YOU BECOME A BIT NUTS. HOWEVER I KNOW IT WILL COME TO ME NICE AND SLOWLY, AND THEN I WONT STOP TALKING - EVER.

BEING MISUNDERSTOOD BECAUSE OF MY DIFFERENT MINDSET FROM THE EXCISTING CULTURE, BEING SEEN THROUGH MY SKIN COLOR AS BEING A RICH PERSON BECAUSE I AM WHITE HAVE BEEN IRRITATING WHEN THE FACT IS THAT I AM ALMOST BROKE. BEING TOLD TO BE MORE AWARE OF MY CLOTHING AS PEOPLE HAVE A DIFFERENT MINDSET, HAVE FELT LIKE COMPROMISING WITH THE FREE SOUL THAT I AM WHEN BEING USED TO LIVE IN A FREE EXPRESSIVE COUNTRY WHERE WHAT YOU WEAR DOESN'T REALLY MATTER YOU START FACING SOME CHALLENGES. BUT AS I WANT IMMIGRANTS TO RESPECT DENMARK, I TRY MY BEST TO RESPECT MAURITIUS.

I FOUND OUT GETTING A NORMAL JOB, WHICH I HAD SEEN MYSELF DOING WOULDN'T GIVE ME THE CHANCE TO LIVE A DECENT AND FAIR LIFE, AS THE BASIC SALERY IS TAKING A PISS OUT OF PEOPLE - NOBODY CAN LIVE ON THAT BASIC SALARY, AND DON'T EVER TELL ME OTHERWISE. THAT FACT HAS PUT ME IN A SITUATION WHERE I HAVE TO THINK BIGGER WHICH IS MET WITH MIXED FEELINGS. THE FACT THAT YOU LIVE IN A FOREIGN COUNTRY, SPEAKING FORIEGN LANGUAGE AND NOW HAVE TO START SOMETHING BIG WHILE STILL FEELING A BIT INSECURE YOU FACE SOME CHALLENGES, SOME DEMONS AND SOME MINDGAME CAUSE YOU DONT HAVE ANY OTHER CHOICE.BUT DOING IT IF YOU WANT FOOD ON THE TABLE .

SO IT IS ALL ABOUT ADAPTING TO A NEW COUNTRY, NEW SURROUNDINGS, ACCEPTING A DIFFERENT MINDSET, COMPROMISING WITH YOURSELF, BEING A GOOD WIFE, REMEMEBER TO GIVE LOVE, FINDING YOUR PATH, FINDING FRIENDS, TRY TO UNDERSTAND HOW THINGS WORK IN THE COUNTRY, TRY TO LEARN THE LANGUAGE, SOMEHOW MAKE MONEY, REMEMBER TO EXPAND YOUR KNOWLEDGE ALL THAT WHILE MISSING SOME OF THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE THE MOST.AND THE HOME YOU'VE HAD FOR TWENTY YEARS. IT IS A ROLLERCOASTER OF FEELINGS AND CAN BE VERY OVERWHELMING. THIS IS ONLY TO GET SOME FEELINGS OUT OF MY SYSTEM, BUT ALSO MAKE MYSELF AND OTHERS AWARE THAT MOVING TO A DIFFERENT COUNTRY WITH DIFFERENT MINDSET AND CULTURE IS CHALLENING IN MANY WAYS AND THAT IT IS IMPORTANT TO JUST BE THERE AND GIVE LOVE TO THE PEOPLE EXPERIENCING IT.

I FEEL BETTER NOW.

THANK YOU.


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THE DELICATE QUESTION

When I met my husband two years ago I thought by his look that he must had been around 27-28, I mean his body said early twenties, his dark black hair had not yet any grey nuances, his eyes was surrounded by smiling wrinkles and he dressed like a smartass but talked like a man. It came as a surprise when he said that he was 37, had two kids and was in the middle of a divorce, thank God I had a drink... or five... when the subject came up, I thought he was making a joke, but it became very clear that he wasn't kidding. So I was sitting there in the middle of my drunkenness with sunburned nose, giggeling as I was trying to do my maths... 21 and 37.... come on Rikke (maths have never been my strong side and now I was drunk also) 16 years difference! Holy crap! But look at him, he is so handsome, speaks with passion and is so inspirering.

The kids thing didn't really scare me at first and in all circumstances it was a part of him. My first meeting with the kids was at a restaurant eating breakfast, they had since their parents separation lived at their moms place during the week and lived with their dad during weekends. They were very polite, sweet and a bit shy, but all in all the most wonderful kids. The girl and I clicked pretty fast and talked about anything and everything. The boy and also the eldest one was more careful but opened up when subjects about books came up or other of his interests. When the kids were around I always tried to keep myself in the background and let them have their dad, and after some time it became very natural and we all came out great together.

As I have three younger sisters, I kind of knew how to handle situations, but of course being young and not having the experience being a mom, you get a bit nervous when you are dealing with someone else's kids. You are having all these frightening pictures in your head that, what if they hate me and I become the bad and super annoying "stepmom" or what if I didn't tackled that situation right, or what if I am being "too young" for this, many questions came up in my head and they are still present sometimes today, however I must have done something right cause I managed not to make them "hate" dad's new girl, and that is a blessing in itself. (well done Rikke) Today two years after, things have changed, but only to the better. We are having the kids more and when we told them that we were getting married we got their blessing, their best wishes and even I love you - which made me warm into my bones.

A few days ago I was sitting at the dining table and had to take some pills for a cold I have been having for some time, on the package it said how many pills I needed to take and when, but as it was in French (I am still working on my French) I asked the girl if I had got it right. She looked at the package and saw my name "Rikke Adjodah", and she looked at me and said "Your name is Adjodah now, so can I call you mom?) I was speechless and actually shocked for a second casue honestly I am 23 and my sisters are about the same age as my husbands kids, so I felt super weird and super OLD haha, but after a few seconds I felt so warm inside and I felt so blessed with this little human sitting next to me asking such a big but yet so innocent question. I simply smiled and said "You can call me what makes you feel comfortable" and she laughed and said "It would be werid no?" we both laughed and I said "I am your friend and you decide yourself what you will call me". Even though she might not call me mom in the future it was a very cute moment. One for the books, and one of those moments I really feel loved.

I am lucky.



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THE BIGGEST DAY OF MY LIFE

After everything that had happen, the day came where I could say " I do" to the love of my life. A life time of commitment and love and I can't wait to share this journey with him. In good and in bad, in sickness and health! We had the most incredible day together. Despite the fact that my beloved family sadly couldn't be around to celebrate us on the day, I could not have wished for any better day! After saying "yes" to each other we went away for a little honeymoon, where we enjoyed every moment together. I feel so lucky and so blessed to be around this human being. My human. We are like night and day, very different, we fight and curse, we get on each others nerves, and we are not perfect at all (thank God), but despite that - our love for each other is deep, honest, furious and real, it is caring and loving, filled with kisses and hugs, open conversations and there is not a thing I would change in him!. This man gifted me not only with his soul, love and his person, he also inspires me everyday and makes me see things in different perspectives. He is full of sarcasm and humour, he snores and he can be super annoying - but do I want to live without him? Hell no!

This is it, my life, my story and it has only begun.

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THE TIME AFTER THE BREAK UP...

I CAME BACK FROM MAURITIUS IN JULY 2015 AND FOUND A JOB AS A BEAUTICIAN 4 DAYS AFTER I GOT HOME. WE WERE STILL A COUPLE AND TALKED EVERYDAY, MORNING AND EVENING TRYING TO HOLD ON TO OUR LOVE... ONE DAY IN OCTOBER IT STOPPED AND WE DIDN'T HAVE ANY CONTACT FOR 6 MONTH AFTERWARDS. CIRCUMSTANCES HAD ENDED IT, AND I WAS HEARTBROKEN.

BEING NEW IN MY JOB, SLEEPING ON THE COUCH AT MY PARENTS AND LOSING THE PERSON TO WHOM I HAD OPENED MY SOUL TO, I FOUND MYSELF LOST. I FORCED MYSELF TO FOCUS ON MY NEW JOB, WHICH I WAS ACTUALLY VERY HAPPY WITH, AND IT BECAME MY DAILY SURVIVAL, I WOULD LIE IF I SAID THAT IT WAS EASY TO ACCEPT THE SITUATION, BECAUSE IT WASN'T. I WAS ANGRY, ANGRY WITH HIM, ANGRY WITH MYSELF AND MOST OF ALL COMPLETELY DEVESTATED ABOUT THE FACT THAT HE WAS NO LONGER A PART OF MY LIFE. THOUGH HE WAS, BECAUSE HE WAS THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT OF IN THE MORNING AND THE LAST THING I THOUGHT OF IN THE EVENING IN ALL THE TIME WE WERE APART.

I SPEND TIME WITH FANILY AND FRIENDS, MADE NEW AMAZING FRIENDSHIPS, STARTED FRENCH CLASSES AND FOCUSED ON MY JOB. I STARTED TO LOVE MY JOB, I EVOLVED MYSELF, GOT MORE CONFIDENT AND I GOT A LOVELY LITTLE APARTMENT WHERE I MADE MYSELF THE OPPORTUNITY TO CREATE A LITTLE HOME. IT WAS NICE TO HAVE A BASE, THOUGH IT WAS VERY LONELY AT TIMES, BUT I FELT MUCH BETTER AND TRIED TO EMBRACE THE TIME I HAD ON MY OWN. IT WAS A HEALTHY EXPERIENCE! IN THE BEGINNING OF 2016 I DECIDED THAT I WANTED TO GO BACK TO MAURITIUS IN MY SUMMER HOLIDAY FOR A MONTH TIME, I STILL DIDN'T HAVE ANY CONTACT WITH HIM, BUT I FELT THAT I HAD TO GO BACK. A COUPLE OF MONTH AFTER I HAD DECIDED TO GO ON VACATION TO MAURITIUS I GOT A MESSAGE FROM HIM. THAT WAS 6 MONTH AFTER WE SEPERATED. MY WORLD TURNED UP SIDE DOWN AGAIN. WE STARTED TO TALK AGAIN, ABOUT ANYTHING AND NOTHING, AS FRIENDS AS A COUPLE, WHAT WE WERE WAS VERY HARD TO DEFINE, WE ONLY KNEW THAT IT WAS AMAZING TO TALK AGAIN AFTER SUCH A LONG TIME. HE EXPLAINED THAT HIS SITUATION HAD CHANGED RADICALLY, INTO THE BETTER .I TOLD HIM I WAS COMING ON A VACATION AND HE WAS VERY HAPPY TO HEAR SO.

WE SPEND ANOTHER 6 MONTH TALKING OVER THE PHONE WHILE HE WAS DOING HIS LIFE IN MAURITIUS AND I WAS DOING MY LIFE IN DENMARK. IN AUGUST 2016 I CAME BACK TO MAURITIUS, I HAD GIVING UP EVERYTHING IN DENMARK AND GOT NEW OPPORTUNITIES TO HANDLE. AFTER A YEARS SEPERATION, A YEAR SINCE WE HAVE TOUCHED AND LOOKED EACH OTHER DIRECTLY IN THE EYES - HE PICKED ME UP IN THE AIRPORT - AND IT FELT LIKE WE HAD NEVER BEEN SEPERATED,

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LET'S CONTINUE...

COMING HOME AFTER MY TWO MONTH ADVENTURE, I KNEW I HAD TO MAKE SOME BIG CHANGES AND MAKE SOME BIG DECISIONS IN ORDER TO BE WHERE I WANTED TO BE AND TO BE WITH WHOM I WANTED TO BE WITH. WITHOUT EVEN KNOWING IF MY FEELINGS WHERE MUTUALLY SHARED WITH THE STRANGER I HAD MET AND TO WHOM I HAD FELL IN LOVE WITH IN MAURITIUS, I TOOK THE STEP AND ENDED MY LONG LASTING RELATIONSHIP IN DENMARK, IT WAS HARD, AS I CARED ABOUT THE GUY, BUT I KNEW THAT IF I COULD FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE WHILE BEING IN A REALTIONSHIP, IT WAS THE BEST FOR BOTH PARTIES TO END IT. AND TODAY I KNOW IT WAS THE RIGHT THING. HOWEVER I KEPT MY FEELINGS A SECRET TO MANY PEOPLE, INCLUDING MY CLOSEST FAMILY AND FRIENDS, WHY? SIMPLE. FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE I WANTED TO MAKE A DECISION WITHOUT HAVING ANY PEOPLE INFLUENCING ME IN MY CHOICES. THIS WAS MY DECISION, A BIG RISK, BUT SOMETHING I HAD TO FIGURE OUT ON MY OWN. I WAS PREPARED TO EITHER FLY OR FALL, BUT ONE THING WAS SURE - I KNEW I HAD TO GO BACK TO MAURITIUS TO FIGURE OUT IF THESE FEELINGS WHERE TRUE AND IF THEY WERE MUTUALLY SHARED.

I WAS IN DENMARK FOR 2 MONTH WORKING HARD AND SAVING MONEY. IN JANUARY 2015 I CAME BACK TO MAURITIUS AND WAS MET IN THE AIRPORT BY A LOVELY FACE. IN THAT MOMENT I KNEW I HAD MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE. I FOUND OUT QUICKLY THAT WE SHARED THE SAME FEELINGS, WE WERE IN LOVE AND UNSEPARABLE. THEN I KNEW I HAD TO TELL PEOPLE WHAT WAS ACTUALLY GOING ON, AND I REMEMBER HOW SCARED I WAS WHEN I HAD TO ANNOUCE IT TO MY FAMILY. AS ALWAYS, THEY WERE SUPPORTIVE.

I SPEND THE NEXT 6 MONTHS IN MAURITIUS, DOING MY DIVING COURSES AND HELPING OUT AT MY BOYFRIEND'S DIVING CENTRE, AND I WAS INTRODUCED TO HIS FAMILY AND FRIENDS - MEANWHILE I WAS LOOKING FOR A JOB, AS I KNEW I WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO STAY IN THE COUNTRY IF I DIDN'T GET ONE. IT WAS HARD - AND I DIDN'T MANAGE TO GET A JOB. AS MY VISA WERE SOON EXPIRING THINGS BECAME TOUGH. THOUGH BECAUSE WE WERE BOTH IN DEEP LOVE WITH EACH OTHER BUT KNEW THAT STAYING TOGETHER WOULD BE HARD AS I WEREN'T ALLOWED TO STAY AND HE COULDN'T LEAVE MAURITIUS, AS HE WAS DEALING WITH A ROUGH DIVORCE CASE AND HAVING TWO LOVELY KIDS WHO NEEDED HIM. THE WORST TIME EVER.

DUE TO ALL THE CIRCUMSTANCES - IT ENDED IN OCTOBER 2015.
AT LEAST FOR SOME TIME....

WILL BE CONTINUED


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IT STARTED EXACTLY TWO YEARS AGO....

AFTER FINISHING THREE YEARS OF COLLEGE AND TWO YEARS OF STUDIES TO BECOME A SKIN THERAPIST I WAS LEFT BEHIND WITH A FEELING THAT I HAD ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT I WANTED WITH MY LIFE.. I WAS MAYBE LIKE MANY OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE IN MY AGE AT THAT TIME BUT ONE THNG WAS SURE, I CAME OUT ONT THE OTHER SIDE AFTER 5 YEARS OF STUDIES AND I FELT MORE STUPID AND POINTLESS THAN EVER. SO, WHAT DO YOU DO... WELL YOU DECIDE TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY FOR SOME TIME. I WANTED TO GET AWAY, TO GET SOME AIR, MEET NEW PEOPLE AND SEE THINGS IN NEW PERSPECTIVES.

AT THAT TIME I HAD NEVER REALLY BEEN ON MY OWN, AS I WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP ON YEAR 4 AND MY FAMILY HAVE ALWAYS BEEN VERY CLOSE TO ME, SO IT WAS ACTUALLY A BIG THING FOR ME AT THAT TIME. I MADE MYSELF CHOOSE BETWEEN BRASIL, MADAGASCAR AND MAURITIUS. I BASICALLY WANTED TO GO SOMEWHERE I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD RETURN BACK TO EVER AGAIN, AND AS MY DAD DIDN'T LIKE THE FACT THAT I HAD TO GO TO BRASIL, MADAGASCAR AND MAURITIUS BECAME MY CHOICE.

I WENT TO MADAGASCAR AND MAURITIUS WITH A LOVELY GROUP OF PEOPLE OF MY OWN AGE, EVENTHOUGH THIS GROUP THING WASN'T REALLY MY KIND OF THING, I BELIEVE IT WAS A GOOD EXPERIENCE AND I LEARNED A LOT FROM THE PEOPLE AROUND ME. IN MADAGASCAR EVERYTHING WAS IN COMPLETELY CONTRADICTION TO WHAT I WAS USED TO. PEOPLE WERE POOR, THEY DIDN'T HAVE MUCH, BUT I COULD NOT HELP NOTICE THEIR FRIENDLY SMILES AND THEIR JOY, IN A SHORT TIME I CAME TO REALIZE HOW LUCKY I WAS. MADAGASCAR'S NATURE BLEW ME AWAY, IT IS THE MOST AMAZING THING I HAVE EVER COME ACROSS. TODAY I STILL REMEMBER OF THE RED SOIL AND THE ICE COLD LAKES INBETWEEN THE MOUNTAINS, THE WATERFALLS AND THEIR OVERWHELMING SOUNDS, THE LEMURS, THE SUN AND THE SILENT. I FELT SO LUCKY, AND TODAY I KNOW I WAS. ON MY WHOLE TRIP I FELT SOMETHING NEW EVOLVE INSIDE OF ME, A FIRE, A PASSION I COULD HUG THE WHOLE WORLD. I FELT PERFECT.

HOWEVER... EVEN THOUGH MADAGASCAR WAS MAGNIFICENT IT WAS NOT WHAT WAS GOING TO TURN MY WORLD UPSIDE DOWN. THEN IN MAURITIUS, I QUICKLY GOT INTERESTED IN SCUBA DIVING., AND THE WORLD ON LAND WAS NOW NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT I WAS EXPERIENCING UNDER WATER. IT WAS A COMPLETELY NEW WORLD TO ME AND I FELT MORE INSPIRED THAN EVER. BUT, THE DIVING WAS ONLY A PART OF IT. THE BIGGEST CHANGE INSIDE OF ME HAPPENED WHEN I MET HIM. I FELL IN LOVE INSTANTLY AND I HAD ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL OF IT. IT LEFT ME BEHIND WITH A BIG CHOICE THAT HAD TO BE MADE WHILE KNOWING THAT I HAD TO HURT SOMEONE I DEEPLY CARED ABOUT. EVENTHOUGH MY TRIP HAD MADE ME STRONGER AS A PERSON AND I HAD BECOME MORE AWARE ABOUT MYSELF AND WHAT I WANTED IN LIFE I LEFT MY TRIP MORE SCARED THAN EVER. WHAT I DIDN'T KNOW WAS THAT IT WAS ONLY THE BEGINNING OF MY NEW LIFE.

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THE FIRST

HI READERS... WELCOME TO MY WORLD

THIS WILL BE MY VERY FIRST POST ON A BLOG EVER! I AM A TOTAL BEGINNER AT THIS AND WITHOUT ANY COMPUTER SKILLS I CAN TELL THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXCITING ADVENTURE! NO SARCASM, I AM REALLY SUPER EXCITED... BUT COMPLETELY UNAWARE OF WHAT I AM DOING....SO - LET'S JUMP RIGHT INTO IT! :)

I DECIDED TO START THIS BLOG BECAUSE.... YEAH BASICALLY BECAUSE I HAVE WAY TOO MUCH ON MY MIND AND SO MUCH I WANT TO SHARE AND AS I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN BETTER IN WRITING MY THOUGHTS THAN SPEAKING MY WORDS I REALIZED THE BLOGGER UNIVERSE WOULD BE "MY THING".

ON MY BLOG YOU WILL FIND ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING ABOUT MY DAILY LIFE LIVING ON AN ISLAND BEING AN ISLAND SOUL GIRL, YET BORN IN THE VIKING'S LAND, NOW LIVING FAR AWAY FROM MY BELOVED FAMILY, CLOSE FRIENDS AND JOB IN THE NORTHERN HEMISPHERE. I WILL WRITE ABOUT MY STORY, MY LIFE, WHAT AND/OR WHO BROUGHT ME ACROSS THE WORLD'S OCEANS, CULTURE, FOOD, DIVING, FEELINGS, FAMILY, UPS AND DOWNS AND SUCCESS. ITS GONNA BE A GREAT MIXTURE OF EVERYTHING.....EVERY ASPECTS OF LIFE.... YOU NAME IT.

ONE THING IS SURE.....

READ ALONG - AND I WILL MAKE YOU FEELTHE ISLANDBREEZE

LOVE RIKKE





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