when feelin like nothing can heal the wounds of past to present pains, arrivin n leavin like unscheduled trains
the act of digging them deep down hurts so am letting go of the strains, gettin off the tracks
fake smiles make me go insane, on status they claim to be in love, so vain,
offline her man be hitting on sum otha, n he said things, like lets keep this between us,
we cud be best friends behind her back n heres a deal yo, had to say no, cuz u is a stanky ass crow
n when i exposed the motherfucker, girl knows now, but the messenger is being blamed,
what a shame..what a shame,.. fake, because I know whats goin on behind closed doors,
when i call her up tears and endless sorrows, cant even get along with her own veins,
but statuses claim "blood is thicker then water"..well fuck u, dont tell me the next time ur being slaughtered, by ur own chains
...ur own games...bored of ur crocodile tears and fucked up fears...how u wish u had another life,
but with ur mask on u almost look sane..haha, almost didnt shoot the rabbit, so imma fall back and let u do ur thaang...
do ur thaang do ur thang...because whats the point of telling the truth when the one whos "listening" ratha pretend it aint..
just to keep doin...their thaaang, that always is attached to sum complaints..talks of enemies jus to go sit in their lap..fo real?
if friendship is friendship only when its convenient, then keep ur ships, ill return all the past ships too...on the ocean of blues..
because im sailin away, ur frail and there aint enough superglue in the entire galaxy to make u feel stable, unless ur able
to break free from fanciful lies, disguising ur bitter remarks n playin it off with, fake faces awkward talkin, fazed like a zombie
unable to look me in the eyes...because I know...well keep playing ur sharades, ill even clap in ur parades,
but behind the veils...god knows wut ur playing, kissing him on the cheek, sweet peaks n the second he is gon
u tell me bout how if the right one came along, this one wud belong to the past, n this ur babydaddyy...really...Reeeally...
n when i say i ratha jus be alone then pretend im in love, for the chance of the real thing to pass my way,
u tell me..u love him..what a joke..what a hoax..the father of ur baby aint nuthing but a fling that happened to stick around
n now he is old..when he is tired he comes back home..because it seems like not even the hoes out there want him
.n this u said urself..HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA...n if u say this about ur "love", then i dont want 2 know what u say of me...
ma sweet sweet friend u see...im leaving thee to furfil ur own destiny...
And what...im not perfect, but i dont need to pretend that i love someone when im hurting, and I cause pain just
like anyone else, only im honest, if i step on ur toes ill apologize, if it dont bother me cuz U caused it, imma tell u im glad u cried
why? because i aint gon hide how im feelin, or what im dealin with...cuz at the end, no shit is big enough to make me quit
quit tellin it as it is, for i dont care, there is no shame in Truth, and nothing Heals like the Truth,
Nothing Appeaaals to me like The Truth, as a youth once broken down and maimed by drama
paused on drama jus to catch up on myself, n as im at my happiest, the closest turn around to say im off the track
when in misery it seems they feel its right, the right job, the right face, the right past, the good taste, to behave
trying to pull me back, sayin what ur lookin for u shouldnt attract, come settle...come settle with us, be glad for what u have
n for so long, voices that didnt belong, told me stories of how to get along with a life that i thaught I aint chosen, frozen in the midst
a pose of hidden shrouds, realised eternally, I Am beyond gold, beyond diamonds, ill die for The Core of what I Am, for it is life itself
n what I Am, I dont need to find in money, or manipulating the crowd, i only gave u my opinion because u wud push me til no doubt
only u fell face flat, what I said wus so blunt n raw, exposed the truth that u converted into abstract sayings..aha..
well if it wusnt...maybe ud have the words to express the opposite, but all u did wus run away..n now u pretend..its all the same
But it aint...
N in the past it wus said this is jus about as real as it gets, no emotions, no ties, no time for u to rest, a game is a game,
I agreed, for it whas what it was, and amongst all he wus the truth amonst the lies, only to realise
lame lies, lame smiles, breaking down to cry for a little attention, a shoulder to lean on
n the second the tables turned, got shut down, skinny foe didnt have love to go around, except for the moments
when skinny foe wus feeling down, because then we wurr friends, then love wus needed, loyalty questioned,
friendship attesting, "less rememba the good times", n all i can say..is for a while i said fuck u and ur version of the past
last time i saw u, mind boggled, face puzzled, was this what i once admired? aspired?
wouldnt have neglected u the way i am, or did.. sorry for the pains that i inflicted..before i realised, the deed was done
and is aiight, a lesson is a lesson, it made sence once it revealed itself
but thas all, thas it..less be friends...less forget...never again to be, selfish animosity, ...
n then there wus..radiating Sun, from a distant world would soak up all his light with my skin, a hope in the desert,
water for my thirst, love from within...turned into obsessive admiration, far away expectations..
floored with emotions as I realised I wus hurting, a hug wud do more good than yearning, had to walk through a maze
of past and recent days, just to come to the conclusion..maybe it just wusnt meant to be...and to get to that point
I wus dreamin away...sumone more jaded then my past wounds would surely be more accepting,
but illusions faded quicker then seconds,
flew away in a daze, not a glimptse of me was there to stay, hid behind the shades of courteous behaviour, and this little lonely girl
how long ago the days that I felt so distant, far away from all reasoning, just wanting to be enveloped in the arms of a saviour
walked down a path that most surely wus set, by powers beyond my mindset, correographed like a divine dance, cant regret
blinded by my own illusions of dreams to come..for a moment so cornered, bothered, confused..nomore amused
nomore so true...so I gave away for all that came, surrendering to the cascades of pain, confessed my ways and turned within,
Again some sain, Again I came, resurrected, in silence deconstructed..the pain no more hurting
Again again...n then Again. missunderstandings stand corrected, grounded yet i should..ground even more..more n more...
just to pick up and fly...leave it all behind, Just Me And The Skies, me n the Dives, In Endless Oceans Of Love I Abide..
for within, all is spin, space it cracks like melted skin, I dive through sleep to other sides... sweetest of all sensation rides
drape every inch of fabric that is my being..fleetin scents of that..Harmony, Melodies, Sweetnes blasting my senses..
of Most Holy, Most worthy, of Heavenly Presence,
my Soul it Greets with radiation, it Heals like salvation..deals with no nations, no borders, no skin, no race, no gender
but all that Shines from the core within...mi corazon..
like pure Light, the first delight, first the sound and then a wave, patterns of origin that Glow like Stars..our closest Kin...
Most gloriously within...Really..really...this is all I can say..With Silence I Pray..we all grow in ur own ways
find the sweetest love that U pray for, the greatest shelter for ur Loveborn, for All ur friends and ur Loved ones...
for you and for you...and for you...I forgive...I let go..i wish u the bestest..u once wurr my bestest..always i bless thee..
I am..Soul..born Never..outcleverin ends Forever...Will Rise Again like The Sun, Eternal father of Earth n all weathers..
The Link That Connects, The Soul Of The Core Of The Bones Of Mountains, too the Might of light feathers, Joint Together
Carrying an Eagle...a Lion of Sky
watch...as I fly...