Does lions breath scare away your inner demons? Does downward dog make you love dogs or maybe even turn you in to one? We've all heard of the power of yoga, but not even yoga can make the impossible possible.

I started doing yoga a couple of years ago, mostly for stretching in the beginning. I have since had breaks from yoga and periods of doing yoga every single day. But what I have come to realize is that yoga doesn't do much for me. It doesn't make me calmer, it doesn't open all my senses and I don't feel reborn.

Everyone I know praises yoga like it was the cure to all diseases. Honestly, I don't feel happier, I don't sleep better, I don't feel "aware" or open or energized and my creativity isn't flowing like a heavy period. So what am I doing wrong?

I mean, I must be doing something wrong, right? Or is yoga perhaps not suitable for everyone? I know everyone feels different and get different benefits from doing yoga, but not getting or feeling anything? That's kind of unfair.

Is my problem that my expectations are too high? THAT MUST BE IT! Or is it that simple?

I don't want to give up yoga because it has become a part of my morning routine and I'm too tired (due to the lack of sleep - that yoga doesn't help with) to exercise.

I guess my problems lay so deep that yoga can't reach it, like there is a big ass wall of shit, stress and more shit? But who am I to diagnose myself? I am my own worst doctor and therapist. Cheap but awful.

"Patience" - says the yoga guru. I am a patient person, I can wait. 

Perhaps all I need to do is fake it till I make it! ​That works for people! I will become my own yogi and drink expensive organic smoothies and ginger shots from my local juice bar. I'll buy yoga wear from lulu lemon and other brands that will ruin my economy. I will spend hours upon hours in the kitchen to make buddha bowls with all organic, detoxing, soul-opening, fantastic, magical, yogi vegetables. I WILL BE MY OWN GURU. 

Or maybe I'll just drink some tea and read a book? We'll see. 

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WTF. What the F**k. Never did I think Instagram and social media would take over my life. But it did, and I didn't even realize it. 

I got Instagram in 2011, at the time I thought it was a platform to share photos, end of story. It didn't take long before I realized that it was a place where the main goal was to get as many likes and followers. The popularity I didn't have in real life I could get here, if I worked hard enough. My shitty pictures of various foods and sunsets weren't enough though. I thought since I was already on the Instagram-train I might as well step up my game, it was too late to jump off it anyways, because I didn't want to be left out. And so I started downloading photo editing apps. But I was never satisfied, not with a single photo. I got a few likes from close friends but that was it. Then came the tags. I would put as many irrelevant tags as possible on my photos, just to get likes. Then came the likes, but in the end I just wanted more and more and more.

The feeling of getting 50+ likes back in 2011 was surreal, it felt like 50 people had given me the biggest compliment, i felt amazing, on top of the world, unstoppable. But of course non of it was true or real. 

It took a few years to stop focusing on it all. To not care about likes. But it was hard. If I posted a photo of myself and got less than 20 likes, did that mean I was ugly? Was that a sign that it was a bad photo? Did people not like me as a person? 

The "Instagram mind" was and is still following me around. I'm still feeling like I have to post photos, that I have to like, comment and keep up with all my "friends". Like it's an obligation. 

Instagram is all about showing people the good sides of your life. But we all know that life isn't good or pleasant or perfect all the time. However we get the illusion that everybody elses lives are amazing and so we get disappointed with our own lives and wish we had their life, when in reality we might be taking our own life for granted. 

You might have the most amazing life that you ar happy with, but as soon as you start comparing it you will soon enough start finding things that aren't great. Your mindset will then shift to only focusing on the bad things. 

Comparing yourself to others is okay and natural, but Instagram takes it to a whole other level. A lot of hate, jealousy and negative thinking comes from it. The pressure to be "perfect" has never been bigger and it's affecting a lot of peoples physical and mental health. 

Not one part of me liked Instagram, but I was addicted to it and there for I didn't realize it. 

I deleted Instagram from my phone, my accounts still exist but I know they have to go. I know I have to get rid of it for good.

F**k Instagram. hihi

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I don't actually know the exact date I went vegan, or plant-based. But I'm guessing it was somewhere around this time two years ago. The greatest way to celebrate it would be to eat some delicious gourmet vegan food, however my fridge is empty and there for I will have to settle with leftover rice and beans (not complaining though).

The first time I went vegan, I messed up. The second time I went vegan, I messed up. The third time I went vegan, I messed up. Thats what happens when you don't educate yourself. Once I educated myself, aka two years ago, I didn't mess up again. Because I knew how important it was and my mindset shifted from seeing it as a diet to a lifestyle.

I have tried diets within the vegan or plant-based lifestyle, such as Raw till 4, Fully Raw, Junk Food Vegan, HCLF (High Carb Low Fat), WSLF (Whole Starch Low Fat). But just eating healthy vegan foods have worked the best for me, generally I eat more carbs and proteins, and less fats. This works well for me, but everyone is different. It took time to reach this point and finding the foods that make me feel my best.

It takes time to become a plant-based PRO (I'm absolutely not a pro), I learn new things and find new healthy foods and recipes EVERY SINGLE DAY. And it's fun! And DELICIOUS!

If you're not vegan/plant-based I suggest you start educating yourself, watch some documentaries, videos on youtube, read books, articles, blogs etc. And try some vegan recipes, try it for a meal, a day, two days, a week, a month!

I will end this post with my top 5 favorite foods at the moment!

1. OATMEAL (Preferably with cinnamon, fruit, chia seeds or any other delicious topping)

2. BROCCOLI (or any vegetable really)

3. POTATOES!!!

4. BLACK BEANS (Seriously though, black beans are life)

5. KETCHUP (I eat so much ketchup, it's delicious, a meal is not complete without it!)


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In my creative writing's class my teacher told us to write, obviously. But he pointed out that what we wrote about or how we wrote it had no meaning in this particular exercise. He asked us to put all the rules away for a while, also to not think about how we wrote nor what words and phrases we used. His intention for using this method was to eliminate all the boundaries, hate and criticism we put on ourselves and our writing.

Writing for three minutes straight feels like infinity when you don't have an actually idea about what you are going to write. "I don't know what to write.", was, for me, written several times before I finally stopped thinking about what letters I was typing. Something clicked, I started writing from my heart and mind, without all of that nasty criticism I always drowned myself in. From it came a mixture of beautiful content rapped around some nonsens with an emotional twist. I had explained the natural smell after a heavy rainfall.

I realized I have, way too often, criticized my writing way before I even start typing. To be honest, I am a perfectionist, however I now know that things, either it's writing, love or anything else in our lives, doesn't have to be perfect from the start. I am my biggest critic but that will never come in the way of the things I love again.

From this one exercise in school, I have learnt things about myself, my writing and life in it self. It all needs to be fun and not taken so seriously. If it isn't fun, there's no point in doing it.

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1. Watching the sunrise. There's something special about watching the night fade away and witnessing the beginning of a new day. Everything is asleep, people and animals, thoughts and feelings. You embrace the beauty of the sun and colors of the sky, the changing in the air as it gets warmer and the feeling of hope. You feel alive and think 'This is going to be a glorious day'.

2. Watching the sunset. What ever happens you can always rely on the sunset to end your day in the most beautiful way. The sun can't change the past, but it can give you some kind of closure and a feeling of hope that tomorrow will be better.

"There's a sunrise and a sunset every day. You can choose to be there for it. You can put yourself in the way of beauty." - Cheryl Strayed

3. Going on spontaneous little adventures. It could be a walk in the woods, a small roadtrip, going to the nearest lake and throwing rocks in the water, just getting out of your house, with a friend, a boyfriend or girlfriend, a family member or completely alone. Planing is sometimes nice, you know what you are going to do and when you are going to do it, however you usually end up just sitting around waiting, you don't enjoy the whole journey. While when one is spontaneous one is also present the whole time, enjoying every single bit of the sweet adventure.

4. Listening to music and dancing your heart out. There's nothing better than findin a song that just fits your mood, personality or vibe (or all three). This is the type of song you dance your heart out to, you know all the lyrics and you listen to it on repet until you really can't stand it anymore.

5. Writing. No matter if I'm happy or sad, had a good or bad day, feeling motivated or not, there is always something to write about. If nothing is going my way or if I simply feel lost in a situation writing is always a great way to sort through my thoughts and help me let go of unnecessary crap. If I'm not already happy then I most likely will be when I'm done.

6. Feeling inspired. Nothing is worse than not feeling inspired. Inspiration is what makes me motivated to do the things I love and makes me happy. When I'm unhappy I'm also not inspired nor motivated. Usually it helps to take a walk or a nap, then I come back home or wake up with new energy and new thoughts.


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