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After 6 hours, we're finally here.
I woke up at 9 today, packed the last things, took a shower and folded my three Gis.

When we arrived at the hotel we unpacked, got ready for dinner and went out. The first thing that hit me when we went out was the cold. Holy shit, it's still winter up here. -5 degrees, no kidding.
We had to walk for a bit to find a decent restaurant, ended up at "The Bishops Arms" and ordered salmon. The healthiest dish I could find. And beer, of course.

So right now we're sitting here at the restaurant chatting, god I LOVE these people. I love being around amazing people, especially these. An endless talking about karate.
Tomorrow is our "graduation", honestly I have no idea if it's actually called graduation, but I'll keep calling it that since I have no other name for it.
Anyway, I'm pretty damn nervous, I'm afraid to mess up.
I know that I know what I'm supposed to know.
But if I do something wrong, I'm screwed.

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Hi, again!
I just realized that I either barely blog, or I constantly think about what to write next and when it's an appropriate time to post it. I also realized that I haven't really written about the things that was the reason for starting all of this, but I promise I'll make a slight change, soon enough! I mean it feels kind of strange to write like this, it's almost like I'm talking to myself, that I'm making summaries of days that has passed and are to come! It feels absolutely amazing that people are reading my endless chatting about everything and pretty much nothing though, and I'm thankful that you're here!

When I was little I used to read fashion and horse blogs, and it became a dream of mine sort of to start one myself. When I grew older I realized that I didn't have very much of a fashion sense, so it was nothing for me! But I have to admit that it would be great fun to inspire people in that way.
So as long as the long gone fashion sense just doesn't randomly pop up in my head, you'll have to bare with my talking about exciting bruises, deep water, adrenaline and fighter jets.

Back to what this post was originally supposed to be about!
Today I was invited to a lunch meeting with my old Taekwon-do trainer, my grandmother (note that she's with me everywhere), a highly ranked person from F16, the new Governor of Uppsala and some other people. It was a great mix between older and younger people, loads of different opinions and the different life experiences differed more than ever. We discussed the immigration, climate changes etc, everyone got to say how they saw things from their perspective.
The atmosphere was just wonderful!

My outfit from today.
Black turtleneck- Zara/ Suit trousers- H&M/ Black heels- Vagabond (?)

And now I'm doing the exact opposite to what I just said, haha

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Morning!
Today was my last training before the graduation this weekend in Östersund. We focused on correcting silly mistakes that are easy to make in both Kata (pattern) and Kihon (techniques). I'd say it feels pretty good, I got an Okay from my Sempai yesterday so it shouldn't be any problem. If I don't mess up of course.
So we're leaving tomorrow at 12 AM, it'll take about 6h to get there so there will be a lot of time to practice on the history of Kyokushin and stuff like that.
Now I just have to wash my Gi(s), pack my bags, and sleep. Sleep a lot. I can't risk to be tired at all on Friday. On the last day, Sunday, we'll have MMA training which will be amazing! My mom is going for brown belt so she might skip it and wait for the final part of the graduation, the fighting, where I'll fight against her on her penultimate fight!

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Today was a good day, yet extremely emotional and strange. Including a meeting with a person I haven't talked to in a very long time, someone who once meant the world to me. I will talk about that later!

I think we've all heard about what happened yesterday in Stockholm, I don't think anyone missed it.
It is a tragedy, it really is. The country that maybe you (and I) live in has been exposed for a terror attack, something the majority of people thought was impossible. It would never happen to our country. But it did.

We aren't as safe as we might think we are, things like these are inevitable, and it will happen again. But, we can't forget that this is no time for blaming a huge group of people for someone else's disgusting work. He and his group of cockroaches are responsible for what happened. We are NOT GOING TO GENERALIZE PEOPLE. The person responsible is not a Muslim, what he did has nothing to do with Islam. Keep that in mind please.

It's no time to pray for Sweden, we don't have time to kneel down anymore, it has gone too far. It's time to get together, stand up and fight for this world. We can't let them win. We know what will happen if they get the power over us, it has happened before and it can happen again. We're getting closer and closer to the edge, but don't we dare fall again.
Hate is born out of hate, hate is what caused the mass extinction of millions of people not very long ago. We never seem to learn from our mistakes.
My thoughts are with the affected families of the innocent victims, and those who are living a nightmare right now.

We cannot back down now, the world needs us.

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Limping down the streets in a black turtleneck dress and bright white sneakers, topped with huge bruises on my legs exploding with pain every time my feet hit the ground. Amazing feeling. A little like an undercover devil.

...the wonderful sound of bones being crushed when our legs meet and we desperately try to ruin the structure of the other's ribs.
My first karate training in 2 weeks went surprisingly well, thought I'd die after 5 minutes. But an hour later from the start of the fighting training, I was still standing steady, at least that's what it must have looked like. On the inside I was dying of pain.

Next week we're going to Östersund for a karate-easter-camp which will be absolutely amazing. I'll try to go for the next kyu, in my case another color of my belt. We'll train for one of the highest graded in the world, and so far he has only said positive things about me.

This week I've had so much to do (that's what happens when you take procrastination to the extreme), and tomorrow on the final day before easter break I have a history test about the Russian Revolution and the interwar period, which I started studying for 2 days ago. (-: Hopefully it'll at least go okay, and since I'm considering changing my subject choices, I'll have two years to make up for my laziness.

Stay groovy and study hard, it's only weeks left until summer break!

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Hi people!
Today I took Högskoleprovet, so I woke up at 6:50 am to get ready and pack my things. The legitimation was at 8:10 so we left at 7:50.
Once we were inside the exam room the nervousness started to show its first signs, but when the time started and I opened the first exam, which was math, the nervousness completely disappeared. There were three math tests and two verbal tests, and I think it went pretty well! But since it was my first time taking the exam I don't have very high expectations.
Anyway, I'm literally exhausted now and my brain feels dead, but I suppose that's relatively logical since we were there for 8 hours.

Now I'm at grandma and grandpa's house drinking wine (surprise surprise), and we're going to eat dinner soon, fiinally!

Hope you have had a great Saturday!
Elise

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Okay this is absolutely unbelievable. One day it's sunny and so hot outside you can legit almost go naked, the other bloody day it's snowing. IT'S SNOWING. RIGHT NOW.

Conclusion:
Don't move to Sweden.

I was just at my grans house discussing my subject choices for next year in the IB diploma program, jobs etc. My grandfather is claiming that I should become a lawyer, with the strong argument that I can defend him whenever he has driven too fast, hahaha! But it is something that crossed my mind a while ago, and I think it would suit me very well.
My grandmother thinks I should go for Harvard when I graduate high school, and it sounds like a plan, also something I've considered. But the pressure will be extremely high and everything is just a huge competition. I know it, but in the end I'll be able to thank myself and everyone around me who has been pushing me through the years, wiping the tears of my face and told me to hang on just a little bit longer.

I'm looking forward to go to school tomorrow again, actually. I have to. I'm taking "Högskoleprovet" on Saturday, and I need my brain to be awake, in shape and fully alert.

Now a long and warm shower awaits and then a goodnights sleep.

Goodnight people!
xx
Elise

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Hello lovely people!
I hope you've had a good Wednesday! Only two days left until it's WEEKEND AGAIN! You can do this!!

I barely got any sleep tonight because of my coughing nonstop till 4 am. I forgot to buy medicine yesterday so I had to be creative, by putting a wet and warm towel over my mouth and breathing through it I was able to breathe properly again until it fell off, lol.

Today I've done loads of stuff, and it feels sooo good. I made food around 11:30 am, an Italian spaghetti casserole, it actually turned out really good and reeally spicy. Then I was able to finish my Spanish essay and I started to write on my lab report in Chemistry. When everything felt good there, I got dressed, did my makeup and headed to town to go window shopping before going to the hairdresser.

Right now I'm waiting for my hair to dry now that we have bleached it (Iwillregretthis), and it feels absolutely disgusting, as it always does. I'm not sure how much I'm going to cut yet though, probably getting something shoulder-lengthish. Or I might just do something crazy but probably not. God, when you sit in their chair staring at yourself in the mirror for 3 hours straight you realize how terrible your eyebrows really are haha.

Tomorrow I'll most likely go to school, I'm still ill and not feeling very well, but staying home makes me stressed. And stress is my worst enemy!

Hm, I get questions about my book a lot, what it will be about and stuff. I appreciate it, but unfortunately I can't reveal anything yet. It's extremely personal and the risks are big. Sorry!

xx
Elise

This is why I don't brush my hair. (-:

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Good morning!

Right now I'm sitting on the terrace eating breakfast and reading my beloved books, Inferno by Dan Brown & 11.22.63 by Stephen King. God I've lost count on how many times I've re-read these two. The sun is shining today again and is hopefully giving my skin some color and not just 4.5 freckles placed randomly in my face like it did the other day.

I'm still ill unfortunately, and I can't wait to go back to school, (lie). But I'm just full of boredom from being home this long, especially now when my mom has gone to Oslo and I'm all by myself. I tend to get really bad food habits when I'm alone for a longer time.

Tomorrow I'm going to our lovely family friend who is a hairdresser and I'll probably get rid of my highlights and make my hair more into one color. I have an idea that I think will look good, it's more like a goldengreyishblonde... God I hate putting colors into words, it never sounds good!

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Today was such a good day, a day full of happiness and amazing friendship. A day I needed more than ever. My best friend came over at noon, he had bought chocolate and Fanta, we ate tacos and sat in the sun for hours. And just talked.
Talked about the most irrelevant things and world problems. He's a person I can be myself and more with, I can't say anything else than that I love him with all myself.

Let's talk about the sun! When the sun appears on the sky that has been filled with thick grey clouds for 6 months, something happens inside of me. The demons that took over me exactly 4 months ago tonight, disappears suddenly! Something I'll have to open up about soon.
But I'm so excited to finally be able to say goodbye to them, I'm more than ready to move on from the things that happened, I'm ready to forgive.

When the sun appears on the cold frosty sky for the first time in what seems like forever, I get so many new ideas for things I didn't even know your brain was able to create new creative ideas for! Spring is on its way, FINALLY.

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