when you are broken
and he has left you
do not question
whether you were
the problem was
you were so enough
he was not able to carry it
- rupi kaur
I got my hopes up. I thought that he loved me like I loved him. But I was wrong. He left. I knew that it would happen and that’s why it doesn’t hurt so much. When he told me that he leaves me, I couldn’t even cry because I was so shocked. I can’t do anything about it that he left. I just have to let go and not look back, I guess. I’m used to get my heart broken. Everyone leaves me sooner or later. They leave me because I’m depressed and anxious. And I can’t do much about it. But even though I’m broken and depressed, I would still do my very best to make the person I love, happy. I tried to make him happy but I guess I wasn’t good enough for him. To be honest, I feel sorry for him. He lost someone who would have given him everything he wanted, but it wouldn’t have mattered because I just wasn’t what he wanted. He lost someone who cared about him and who always wanted to make sure that he was okay. He lost someone who loved him.
I know that I deserve better than this. And I know that I deserve the love I try to give someone else. I’m confident enough to know that. I can’t do anything about it that I have so much love to give.
I know that not everyone who comes into my life will stay. People say that everyone who comes into your life, is either a blessing or a lesson. At first, I thought that he was a blessing but it turned out to be a lesson. I believe that everything happens for a reason and at first I thought that everything I’ve been through has led me to him, but I was wrong. But I know that I met him for a reason. Maybe so that I could learn to deal with heartbreak better.
Someday, someone will come into my life and that person will hopefully stay. Someday, I will be good enough for someone.