So lately I have been pondering destressing, juggling, basically getting everything done and being happy ? feeling fulfilled that you have accomplished all that you want in a day including maintaining a home, playing with kids, meeting any husband expectations and also in my case having time for building a church ? Maybe in your case it is building a business or some other time consuming work or hobby! But there are similarities in schedule and principles! Hope anything here helps!
So this thought came to me through various inspirations... Thank you Kathy Gossen cornerstone confessions blog for a pin I found linked to her blog called "99 ways to respect your husband." At first I thought it may just be some over spiritual, overly simplified version of help me, help you. But it was simple and I enjoyed the list! (Admittedly all I read) but it consisted of things you would expect; have the house clean when he comes home, listen to him when he talks, touch him with affection- all great things. These are ways we can show him we love him, by showing him respect. Now what caught my attention was the one that said, wake up when he wakes up and go to sleep when he goes to sleep. So it's really a simple thing but the revelation in this as i started doing this, was that i had time to reflect on my day and pray, which puts me in my happy place and brings me joy. Also i have more than enough time to clean my house to ready myself for the day. Also i believe moms need time where they feel free of their kids everyday so it is a joy when they do get a chance to play and bond with their kids. We are attached to our kids at the hip no matter what we do or where we go and we need breaks to give our self the respect our body, mind and spirit need! So go ahead and wake up when your husband does, just try it! See what you can get done, including all the house errands that take forever with toddlers and babies like getting the mail and watering the plants! Enjoy your breakfast on the patio! Etc.
I think God purposed it this way that as we respect our husbands wishes because we want to show our husband how much we love him then God in turn blesses our time to be more productive whilst more enjoyable (i.e. blessed). I thought doing this would be harder because I breastfeed through the night, my toddler still wakes up and I go to bed late from church fellowships or other fun late events! (To enjoy life- also something we need) So I thought I needed that sleep in the morning, that I was dependent on that. But I found myself more rejuvenated from the time I had to get things done I really was craving accomplishing every day. With that said, I haven't woken up at 4am or 5am every morning when my husband sets his alarm. The first morning my husband said get some sleep but I wasn't tired, I wanted to be up. So my husband does want me rested and my family needs me in good shape so I do both when I want to sleep in because I need to, I do. But other times I am ready to start my day even if one is up earlier than the other, more house goals will get finished. Honestly I used to party hard and still be tired and wake up happy when I was younger so I can make that sacrifice for my family which is what makes me happy now. When I say party I mean 7am sleepovers and 1am restaurants : ) no booze lol Sometimes you may only wake up fifteen minutes before your kids but the amount of stuff you can get done in that timeframe!!!! Seriously, try some form of this with intention!
Also I read a quick blog about "Overcoming Overwhelm" by Eric Sachetta which I thought was encouraging.. he said he doesn't look at his day as a list but rather an outcome which is essentially what was tumbling around in my brain when I opened his email link. The outcome is serving your family into happiness haha so you naturally meet the list. Honestly, a stroke of genius ness lol maybe over stated but definitely inspired. So with that in mind, it shouldn't be hard to forget the things your husband asks you to do because you are looking for ways to respect and bless him! If he says, can you pay all the utilities bills, that becomes the priority i.e. schedule for the next day. Say; clean, bills, laundry. So in the morning I cleaned, my son woke up we did phone calls and bills, my daughter woke up and we did breakfast and played til they needed a break from the house and we headed to the laundromat. All in all the house was clean and laundry was not stressful because the hard parts were done earlier in the day like lugging three loads of laundry to the car.
So all of this has spoken a lot about husbands but I believe when you put your priorities in the right order the rest works out "and all these things will be added unto you." Personally, it goes God first, husband 2nd, kids third, work fourth and the rest after that. So what that looks like is I acknowledge God in all my ways and he gives the strength and motivation to do what is right. My husband is my number one in life, he comes before any other person, he will be the one "rockin' right beside me" and my kids come before me unless it is a matter of self respect and dignity. Like showering, getting ready for my day i.e. styling myself etc.
This blog turned out much longer then I thought it would but sometimes its not what we need to do but how we need to do it that is the real revelation. So hopefully this helped. Currently my children are napping because my son woke up earlier than usual. So last thought, if you have not read the book, "Love and Respect" by a one christian psychologist Dr. Emmerson Eggerichs it is one of the most interesting man vs. woman reads, in my opinion and not too detailed for a young mature reader. The basic gist says that when you get married "the two become one" and also that "man was created in his image" that a woman represents the side of God that is "God is love" and the man represents the side of God that demands justice, truth and vengeance all of this falls under Respect. That both embody the greater picture of God as a whole. Another reason why marriage is a beautiful thing, that God instituted in the garden of eden. God defines marriage because he made it. That both men and women need both love and respect but a woman cannot live without love and a man cannot flourish without respect. He gave a great example of a husband and wife arguing with pink and blue oxygen tanks both stepping on each others hoses as they disrespected and said unloving things to each other. This is why I believe that respecting your husband is showing him you love him. Because he is not as floored by every whimsical love note as just doing the things he asks for. Although he needs both. As do we, us women, need to be shown the respect we deserve, but coo and caw over the flowers and little loving things our man does for us! :) see I couldn't even make it without a smiley face hahaha. The other thing that it explains is how we deserve these things from our spouse, going both ways. We both vowed to love and respect each other for the rest of our lives. That is what marriage is, another way of saying it is, we are dedicating our full lives to one another so you cannot withhold what the other one deserves. No room for selfishness on this issue because you guys gave the gift of each other, in order to have each other together forever. "Two are better than one."
One final thought... Too many second closers came to mind having Pastor Warner as a leader in my headship. Haha so my husband told me a quote years ago when we were dating, I think it originates from Pastor Smith but i may be mistaken, maybe Pastor Rubi, any who it goes like this. "The problem is never in the revelation but rather the application." Breath that in.. Haha Its not hard to know what is right to do but rather how to do it. The military has a saying that says always choose the hard right over the easy wrong. Also this applies to lofty theories that sound great on paper but in reality have vital flaws. I love this quote because it covers so much ground and depth in such a short sentence. Also revelation has a timing to it. You can realize that you need to be a great father and husband after leaving your family but the time has passed where, mom has moved on and the kids have grown. So again application is almost more vital then revelation in this case. Also when presenting ideas and implementing new ministries or sharing the simple gospel. Most people know that Christ died for them and their sins but its important how you present and unravel that story and gift to them, it should be treated as an honor and given with spirit filled intention, at least excitement for having the best news on the planet! Cheers, sorry for the side note and bonus paragraphs! :-)
"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33
Brad Paisley song, "She's Everything"
She's the voice I love to hear
Someday when I'm ninety
She's that wooden rocking chair
I want rocking right beside me
Everyday that passes
I only love her more
Yeah, she's the one
That I'd lay down my own life for
"And the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh." Mark 8:10 NIV
"So God created man in his image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." Genesis 1:27
"The person who doesn't love doesn't know God, because God is love" 1 John 4:8
But God defines love, not man. To clarify on the issue of "love wins".
"Two are better than one" Ecclesiastes 4:9