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Sad and scared, that my feeling right now. We saw a perfect apartment on the Norman Roade, we maybe rent it. But as you guys might now we went to our new midwife, she didn't want to tell us in the phone the "problem" and I gonna tell you this.

As we came to her, she wanted to talk about my pregnancy and our ultrasound. Something bothering her, something was wrong. She said that it was something behind our baby, who moved. We listening to the heart and heard two hearts, yes you reading right. Not one TWO!!

But at the ultrasound (not the one we took home) and the doctor said that this mysterious baby was small and maybe don't survive.. So we are going very soon to the doctor and get a new ultrasound to see if the baby has grown and can survive or not. If not, they want me to operate and it can be really hard.

This make me feel pretty sad, I just have mentally prepared me for one baby now it's two... And I know, it sound like I don't want two babies. Not like this really, yes it's wonderful to hear that I am expecting twins. To perfect babies I only can love more and more but to hear that maybe I have 45% chance to get two babies and the rest only one. It scares me A LOT!!!

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What a day! It's raining but it doesn't stop for begin happy! This morning we turned from 11 weeks to 12 weeks pregnant, and like a strawberry candy in the cake we are going to look for some apartments and hopefully were going to see our home😍

Right now, we sleep together at Zac mostly. Just because his parents right now aren't home (they are in Thailand to celebrate their 15th marriage). And after that, we are going to our midwife for the first time and talk. #happygirl

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​I love to looking back at the time I just only got ​HIM​ by my side, the lower one and the higher one (right side) is from this summer. Crazy right? On the left side is from the last year, so crazy. Yeas, I dyed my hair red.. I thought it would look cool on me and no Zac has no tattoos, its a drawing haha lol! It's so crazy how much we have been changing over just one year, I mean. We have been knowing each other for like 2 years but become g+b-friend ​December 15 2014​ and now? I really love him so much, yes. ​WE​ where two different persons then, we smoke and everything. Zac still smokes, drinks and parties. I like more the cuddling thing, watching movies. After we found out that I was pregnant, we got so much to learn. Young, wild and free people says. I say... Young, happy and strong.

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This day has been amazing, absolutely amazing. First I woke up in the bed, Zac actually cooked breakfast to me. Then I took a shower, ate really nice lunch and then we bake me and my family. When the others came, gosh so happy. First birthday like an grown up woman, first I thought people will be looking weird at me but no, they just had fun and talking like normal. So here comes little photos of my day, not so much. I had my mind on others, everything is not here, i mean presents but still.

I got also £100 from my parents, and these money goes to my baby. I think clothes, so I am gonna talk to my doctor also, like which week we can see the gender of this little human 😍

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​Good morning all! It is ​November 18 2015​ and do you know what specially day it is? ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!! Actually my 17th birthday, so I woke up late. I can hear Zac making something before he went too the interview, omg. And soon it's Christmas too!

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My man can surprise me, I mean. Really surprise me! He texted me to get ready in 1h (of course after my bath) and I did, yeah not a fancy dress I know but I didn't know the surprise..

He took me to a restaurant, we ate 3 different thing. We talked, kissed and just see into each other. After this, we went home to him, so now we are home. He's place, we are going to have a movie night. I love him so much, after our fight about this pregnancy he really stood up for him self, I mean, he was just scared.. And now? Everything feels so perfect right now.

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