I just wanted to say thank you to all my readers that have followed me this far, it has only been over a week and I can't believe that got to such an amazing start.

However, I am a very spontaneous person. There are many definitions to that, but to me it's the fact that I always have thousands of thoughts jumping in my head and that I want to do and achieve millions of different things at once. In reality, that is impossible, but as a result of it, you become spontaneous. And as much as I love writing, I feel like I still haven't figured out which path I want to take with this blog, and exactly what I want to achieve with it. So I will continue my blogging eventually but I will put the blog on ice until I've figured out which path I want to take with it, I'll be back as soon as I figured that out (could take everything from a few weeks to three-four months depending on how my life looks).

Don't worry, my social media will be flooding as soon as I get back to my blogging. And you know, masterpieces take time to construct and Rome wasn't built in a day. And if I want my blog, which I consider very important, to truly explode, to truly make a difference and to express something important I need to take some time off and well, philosophize about it and work with my blog behind the scenes.

Because I truly want my blog to be a masterpiece. I don't want it to be a half-hearted attempt to earn some money or a lousy shot to write about my daily life. I want it to make a change and I want to reach out to people and I want it to rattle in the minds of individuals and to make a difference for things that truly matters to me. So I'll see you when I've figured everything out!

And don't worry. I won't be gone for too long. And when I come back, I will have an unique, original, inspirational and influential masterpiece to express myself through And I can't wait to share it with all of you.

XOXO


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I am a dreamer, and I have been since I was a toddler. I dream and philosophize about life and the human existence so much that ¨day-dreamer¨ has probably grown into one of my main personality traits among my friends and relatives. I have no lack of rather enormous dreams and I wrote about a few of them in my introduction.

But I, like most of the people I know, suffer from some kind of anxiety, to a lesser or larger extent, for different reasons. Some of us are just anxious about our daily life, such as work and school, some of us suffer from some kind of mental illness and anxiety might be a bi-effect of it and some of us (like me) sometimes feel anxious about life because we feel like we are at a certain point in life where we're not moving forward. We feel stuck in our journey and we have no guidence in how to continue towards the life we aspire.

Honestly it sucks, it happens every now and then and my first reaction to it is to start digesting some anxiety reducing medication. But when i think a step further I wonder, is anxiety really something bad? Perhaps it's just the Scandinavian, rather self indulgent approach to turn every bad sentiment and feeling into a mental disease?

Don't get me wrong, mental illnesses are something real and I am NOT trying to decrease anyone's experience of it. However, I do believe that there is a certain tendency in the west to always LABEL everything. I also believe that anxiety is something that often emanates out of outer strains and hardships, rather than emerging directly from your brain as a mental illness. And i don't think medication can cure the first-named anxiety. Because while there are useful medications for mental illnesses in your brain, you can't medicate away the hardships and obstacles of your life. And perhaps we should start looking for ways to change our lives for the better, instead of being obsessed with medications and labels that merely reduce the extensiential anxiety some of us deal with.

And while anxiety is a nasty, disgusting feeling that cripples time to time in our souls, perhaps we should start seeing it as guidence. It might just be an indication that we aren't where we are supposed to be in life, and it might come with the notion that something isn't right and that we should try to change it instead. We should never let our obstacles and problems absorb us and define us as people and we should always work towards solving them instead of compassing ourself in self indulgence.

xoxo

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Considering that we live in an era where literally every teenager and even adults in the west use social media, this is a question that is lingering in my mind. How are other people's opinions and social media impacting and changing our daily life, values and the way we choose to express ourselves in terms of language and content?

Are we getting lost in the entire like culture? Do we lose weight for ourselves and for our health or do we do it so that we can post pictures with the hashtag #fitspo in the caption? Do we dress up for ourselves and because we love the fashion or do we do it so that others, particularly the other sex (or the same sex if you're gay) find us attractive and desirable? Do we post about our food, drinks and social occasions on Facebook and Instagram because we actually enjoy it or do we do it so that others can see how much we are enjoying our dinner/party/event whatsoever?

Don't get me wrong, I don't actually think there is anything wrong with the like culture. I am definitely a part of it myself. I love posting pictures of my outfits and when I was younger I was rather obsessed with my Instagram pictures and getting a lot of likes and comments. However, I do think there are more important things in life than how others view us and how others want us to be. As individuals, we are so much more than what other people think of us, and we are also more than the superficial, we are more than the way the social media depict us.

I also think the entire like culture affect girls more than boys. Why? And please correct me if you think I'm wrong, but in my opinion, we teach girls at a very early age to care a lot more about their appearance and looks, and we also teach them to grow up faster. And we also teach them to relate a lot of things they do to men. I'm quoting Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (again), she said:

'I think men are lovely, but I don't think that women should relate everything they do to men: did he hurt me, do I forgive him, did he put a ring on my finger? We women are so conditioned to relate everything to men. Put a group of women together and the conversation will eventually be about men. Put a group of men together and they will not talk about women at all, they will just talk about their own stuff. We women should spend about 20 per cent of our time on men, because it's fun, but otherwise we should also be talking about our own stuff.'

I think it is rather accurate. Of course it doesn't apply for every single man and woman on earth, but in general (also, this may be more or less accurate depending on where we are in the world).

But honestly, this applies for every group in the Swedish society. For example, Swedish hipsters and feminists LOVE to post about their avocados, sushi-dinners, red wine at some gay dominated bar in Södermalm, and Filippa K/Acne clothes (preferably second hand because they want to be depicted as "woke" and "aware"). They also probably have a "black lives matter" or lgbt supporting picture somewhere in their feed.

And we can definitely appreciate the like culture. We can appreciate the superficial, cursory, frivolous and one-dimensional reality that it provides. We can appreciate seeing people drinking, eating, partying and shopping on Instagram and we can appreciate the mainstream music and fashion that is always shown. My crucial point is that we should never get lost in it. Because life is so much bigger than the like culture. There are a lot of consequential and meaningful things that aren't being shown in the like culture. So can we all just take a step back from the like culture a day and learn to appreciate the less superficial, less mainstream and less one-sided reality? Can we learn to appreciate the beauty of fashion and music that aren't regularly depicted in social media? Can we learn to to live our lives solely for ourselves and not with the notion of being liked and desirable? And can we learn to actually appreciate the like culture without being absorbed by it?

xoxo


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Since I actually launched the blog just a few days ago, I'm going to do ten fast questions about me so you'll get to know me better!

1. Why did you start blogging?

I have a lot of aspirations and dreams that I want to fulfill during these following years and I want to write about my journey to get there and share it with the world. I truly hope my readers will find my life journey, what I write and what I do interesting because I put my soul and heart into it, and eventually I hope I can inspire others to do the same no matter what they dream of or what they want to acquire. Please give me a comment if you have something you want to tell me.

2. Three random facts about yourself

- My mind is usually spinning like a tornado and everyone who knows me to well knows that I always wander off daydreaming.

- And when I'm not daydreaming I'm usually singing some Rihanna, Beyoncé or Madonna song.

- I used to hate working out, but now I can't go more than three-four days without going to the gym

3. Your three biggest fashion inspirations?

Naomi Campbell, Grace Jones, G-dragon (it variates over time and I also look up to a lot of famous and not-so-famous designers).

4. If you could see yourself in five years, where would that be?

Either at a college in New York or San Fransisco studying my ass off or working on my way towards becoming a musician/popstar. Hopefully I will have the money to travel a lot too. Also, this blog will probably be a lot bigger and I have always loved writing so I guess writing in some way will be part of my daily life.

5. Do you have any ambitions for the coming year?

Actually, they aren't that eccentric. I really just want to score straight A's, score my SAT, SAT 2 and TOEFL and expand the blog. Hopefully I can make time to write some music along with this, but at this point. College preparing, blog writing and working out will be my main focuses for now (If I try to do too many things at once, my brain usually goes nuts and I can't focus and I just end up doing nothing at all).

6. What specific personality traits do you admire in people?

People who are unapologetic, strong-minded, focused and constantly moving forward are people that usually inspire me. People who aren't afraid to dream and who aren't afraid to make their dreams come true. That's why I'm often very sceptical to people who talk about their aspirations in life, because I have met WAY too many people who are afraid of the life they truly want to acquire or who just talk about their dreams but do nothing to accomplish it. I also really admire people who aren't afraid to express themselves (that does not necessarily mean being an aberrant, bizarre maniac, but individuals who put their own notions and expressions over people's assumtions and opinions.

7. Five favorite musicians/singers

Nina Simone, Rihanna, Beyoncé, Madonna, Ella Fitzgerald.

8. Do you care what other people think about you?

In today's media climate, I think it's inevitable. I think the entire superficial like-culture is really harmful and it creates a notion that faking your life and having perfect Instagram/Facebook pictures is the way to live. Sure, having a lot of likes and comments is nice but in the end it's has a very insignificant effect in your life. In the end, we are all humans, and most of us care about other's opinions to a lesser or larger extent. So of course I care, but I think it's a strength that I really don't give a shit about people's opinions when it comes to the things that "sets my soul and heart on fire". It might sound cliché but it is true.

9. Five favorite TV shows?

Grey's Anatomy, Sex And The City, Gossip Girl, Person Of Interest, The Originals

10. What is your best advice to a happy life?

You tell me, I'm still trying to figure it out.

XOXO

Me doing a devil cosplay of Cristina Yang last Halloween, it's a beautiful day to save lives people!

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So my father and his (newly married) wife Carina got married ten days ago. I am SO happy for them and I really just wanted to share some pictures from this very lovely occasion! They met many, many years ago and they were actually a couple in their late teens/early twenties (and they aren't particularly young anymore, especially not my father 😉 but nonetheless their love is however blossoming like a grand orchid growing in the spring sun).

Let me tell you something, I actually held a speech and sang 'like a virgin' to the new married couple, and the entire audience started to cry.

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There are great books and there are books that manage to change the way you look at the world. Americanah does both. Oh, and if you already aren't convinced to read Americanah, you might be after five of my favorite quotes from the book

"Ifemelu shook her head and turned to the window. Depression was what happened to Americans, with their self-absolving need to turn everything into an illness. She was not suffering from depression; she was merely a little tired and a little slow. 'I don't have depression,' she said. Years later, she would blog about this: 'On the Subject of Non-American Blacks Suffering from Illnesses Whose Names They Refuse to Know.' A Congolese woman wrote a long comment in response: She had moved to Virginia from Kinshasa and, months into her first semester of college, begun to feel dizzy in the morning, her heart pounding as though in flight from her, her stomach fraught with nausea, her fingers tingling. She went to see a doctor. And even though she checked 'yes' to all the symptoms on the card the doctor gave her, she refused to accept the diagnosis of panic attacks because panic attacks happened only to Americans. Nobody in Kinshasa had panic attacks. It was not even that it was called by another name, it was simply not called at all. Did things begin to exist only when they were named?"

“You could have just said Ngozi is your tribal name and Ifemelu is your jungle name and throw in one more as your spiritual name. They’ll believe all kinds of shit about Africa.”

“What a beautiful name,” Kimberly said. “Does it mean anything? I love multicultural names because they have such wonderful meanings, from wonderful rich cultures.” Kimberly was smiling the kindly smile of people who thought “culture” the unfamiliar colorful reserve of colorful people, a word that always had to be qualified with “rich.” She would not think Norway had a “rich culture.”

“They ticked the boxes of a certain kind of enlightened, educated middle-classness, the love of dresses that were more interesting than pretty, the love of the eclectic, the love of what they were supposed to love. Ifemelu imagined them when they traveled: they would collect unusual things and fill their homes with them, unpolished evidence of their polish.”

“The only reason you say that race was not an issue is because you wish it was not. We all wish it was not. But it’s a lie. I came from a country where race was not an issue; I did not think of myself as black and I only became black when I came to America. When you are black in America and you fall in love with a white person, race doesn’t matter when you’re alone together because it’s just you and your love. But the minute you step outside, race matters. But we don’t talk about it. We don’t even tell our white partners the small things that piss us off and the things we wish they understood better, because we’re worried they will say we’re overreacting, or we’re being too sensitive. And we don’t want them to say, Look how far we’ve come, just forty years ago it would have been illegal for us to even be a couple blah blah blah, because you know what we’re thinking when they say that? We’re thinking why the fuck should it ever have been illegal anyway? But we don’t say any of this stuff. We let it pile up inside our heads and when we come to nice liberal dinners like this, we say that race doesn’t matter because that’s what we’re supposed to say, to keep our nice liberal friends comfortable. It’s true. I speak from experience.”

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Today is Sunday which means inspiration day and I will dedicate this post to the amazing Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie!

She is an amazing, award winning author and she has written some real masterpieces. Some of them include Purple Hibiscus, Half a yellow sun and of course, one of my All-time favorites, Americanah.

Americanah is about a woman named Ifemelu and a man named Obinze. They both grow up in Nigeria and they eventually grow into a very romantic teenage couple. However, when Ifemelu grows up she decides to move to America, in search of a better life and to escape the ¨oppressive lethargy of choicelessness¨ in Nigeria which she describes later in the book.

While in America, her life becomes a tangled mess between friendships, enemies, jobs, romances and a life where she always lives on the edge of poverty, until she finally decides to start a blog about the post racial issues in America. I've picked out some of my favorite quotes from the blog here:

“In America, racism exists but racists are all gone. Racists belong to the past. Racists are the thin-lipped mean white people in the movies about the civil rights era. Here’s the thing: the manifestation of racism has changed but the language has not. So if you haven’t lynched somebody then you can’t be called a racist. If you’re not a bloodsucking monster, then you can’t be called a racist. Somebody has to be able to say that racists are not monsters.”

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Americanah

"You see, in American pop culture, beautiful dark women are invisible. (The other group just as invisible is Asian men. But at least they get to be super smart.) In movies, dark black women get to be the fat nice mammy or the strong, sassy, somewhat scary sidekick standing by supportively. They get to dish out wisdom and attitude while the white woman finds love. But they never get to be the hot woman, beautiful and desired and all. So dark black women hope Obama will change that. Oh, and dark black women are also for cleaning up Washington and getting out of Iraq and whatnot."

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Americanah

“Finally, don’t put on a Let’s Be Fair tone and say “But black people are racist too.” Because of course we’re all prejudiced (I can’t even stand some of my blood relatives, grasping, selfish folks), but racism is about the power of a group and in America it’s white folks who have that power. How? Well, white folks don’t get treated like shit in upper-class African-American communities and white folks don’t get denied bank loans or mortgages precisely because they are white and black juries don’t give white criminals worse sentences than black criminals for the same crime and black police officers don’t stop white folk for driving while white and black companies don’t choose not to hire somebody because their name sounds white and black teachers don’t tell white kids that they’re not smart enough to be doctors and black politicians don’t try some tricks to reduce the voting power of white folks through gerrymandering and advertising agencies don’t say they can’t use white models to advertise glamorous products because they are not considered “aspirational” by the “mainstream.”

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Americanah

After reading the book I realised that, damn, this woman is mad talented. So I decided to look her up (Apart from her Beyoncé collaboration I did not know much about her before the book). But after reading and watching some of her interviews she immediately became someone I felt familiar with. Someone who reflected almost every single one of my opinions and someone who put words to a lot of things that bothered and lingered in me, but that I didn't know how to express by myself. Oh, and if you want to buy the book in English, click HERE. Or if you'd rather buy the Swedish version, click HERE.

She's got a myriad of brilliant speeches and interviews but if I could choose just one, I would want everyone to take about thirty minutes of their time and watch this video. And even if you are incredulous to feminism, do me a favor and watch it anyway (I'll bet ten bucks you won't regret it).

One thing that I love about her is that as much as she is a strong-minded feminist, she still has an imaginative mind (Something that I think a lot of Swedish feminists lack) and she is still open for debate to people with different views and ideologies. There is a certain self-righteousness in the Swedish feminism climate that I find is very hard to swallow (It might have to do with the fact that most feminists in Sweden consider themselves ultra-left) but anyway, a self-righterous mind is in my opinion a very constrained mind. So I guess what I am trying to present is that apart from Chimamanda's brilliant mind and brilliant ability to express herself in words, she also has an open, imaginative and very candid approach. And that is something that I admire a lot.

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I am Axel Erik Yoobin Wolff, I am seventeen years old and I currently live in Stockholm.

So, why did I decide to start blogging? Well, first of all, I LOVE fashion, music, travelling and literature. Topics that are so interesting to write about, and I LOVE reading about fashion, shopping and culture. Everything from the classic Vogue and ELLE, to the more youthful but just as compelling Dazed Digital, iD vice and Another Magazine and to a myriad of Korean fashion bloggers and magazines are on my weekly reading list (Btw, fact about me, I'm actually from South Korea and we have the BEST fashion, style, technology and food in this world, don't even try to fight me on this). And I also love SHOPPING, like shopping is LIFE and although I work out at the gym at least four times a week, there are no better exercise than going on a shopping spree in New York or London.

We managed to arrive the minute they opened the Kenzo / H&M collection at H&M on Fifth Avenue in New York.

Also, I LOVE travelling. Unfortunately, when you're a student who are stuck in upper secondary school. Your travelling and exploring options aren't particularly wide open. However, this blog is going to be PACKED with posts and pictures next time I travel abroad. This year and 2018 I already have trips to New York, South Thailand (or Mexico) and France on my schedule, so stay tuned. For fun, I'll probably do a travel guide to the heart of New York City because that is MY SHIT and I've already been there three times.

From my last vacation to Santa Pola, Spain with Sofia. I love you baby!

Music is part of my daily life, I listen to everything from the 20s jazz to the 70s disco to the 90s/00s R&B and to the 50s blues (today's radio music on the other hand is literally horrifying and I'm embarrassed to say that I'm a part of this shameful music era). If I ever got to heaven in the afterlife it would probably be on the condition that I would have to listen to the entire Spotify top 50 global and I might choose hell instead.

But I also have huge dreams and aspirations for the future. I want to study at Columbia/NYU in New York and I also want to become a popstar/fashion icon at the same level as Beyoncé, Grace Jones and Naomi Campbell. Oh, and when I'm older i also want to launch a fashion brand, clothing and make up collections and a fashion magazine and I also want an apartment with a view over Central Park and a beach mansion in Mexico. Oh and I also want to open up schools for gifted children and teenagers all around the world, And at some point in life I also want to live in South Africa, raise a lion cub, study medicine and biology and work on finding a cure for different types of cancer and do something crucial to help preserve our tropical nature.

But I figured that I needed somewhere to write about my journey, and I came to the conclusion that a blog was perfect., and that's what I'm going to dedicate a big part of this blog to. I hope you are going to find it interesting and eventually I hope I can inspire other driven, young and dreaming individuals too. You are very welcome to follow my blog, my journey and my life and ride with me through all the storms and excitements that our lives put us through. And hopefully I can look back at this blog in ten years and say ¨Damn, I am so proud of myself because now I live the life I have always pursuaded¨ and ¨This was a hell of an adventure¨.

Until next time, XOXO

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