Sometimes the most draining thing is the «What if» and being afraid of the anxiety . Today i was awake early and wanted to take the train into the city with my best friend . So my head must prepare myself for the «What if» .. i start with charging my phone cause if i get a panic attack i need to make Mathias come get me . Then music , i need to remember my headsett so i can shut the world out if its too much . On my way i buy some food and water !! Most important thing for sure is too eat and drink enough cause if not your body is more likely to get anxious and unwell . Today the train into the city went well , anyway my lawyer was calling me so i was to busy focusing on that . Walking around in the city went also fine , sometimes i felt dizzy but then drinking water helps . On the way home i could not get on the train at all , it was packed full even before i went in on the train so my brain just said no . What if i would get a panic attack between all those people and not even being able to sit .. Nope ! Mathias had to pick us up . I probably should have taken the train but i already had one trip already that day and 5 hours walking in the city . Sometimes i must put my foot down for myself cause i usally push myself to the limit and end up very anxious the next few days . But today was a good day ,after all ! First time taking the train to the city after my panic attack this summer .
Good day

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I thought I should share a bit about my first panic attack. As I mentioned earlier, I also struggle with anxiety when I was very young, but I do not remember that very good or the feeling other than i was sick. This happened in the summer and I had a very turbulent time with my family. I was very tired. Once you have been in child welfare service throughout your childhood, you have a lot of documents that you can read the day you reach age 18. These documents will (for me )contain much you do not know and remember. for my part there were a lot of horrendous things. So for everyone else it might seem like i was doing okay at this time but on the inside I did not feel very good . I was traveling to Germany with my boyfriend and friends of ours. On my way to the airport, I began to feel bad, but I did not think so much about it other than i might have gotten sick. When we get into the plane, I begin to feel panic. There was so little space and I felt I did not breathe well enough. I thought that now I had become seriously ill. The trip took 50 min and I was in panic all the way, I lay my head down on my knees and tried to breathed. everyone thought I had flight fear but i had traveled to turkey (4 hours flight travel) just 2 months earlier and that was not a problem. As soon as we landed, I felt a little better, into the fresh air. but I started slowly to feel uncomfortable. I was so scared because I thought i was seriously ill. It tightened around my chest all the time. I felt like I had a brick lying on my chest. We were in Germany for 4 days and I remember almost nothing! I guess It felt like i was drunken the whole trip because it's gone from my memory. When we got home to Norway, it took a few days before I went to a doctor. It started one evening to get tight around my chest again and I felt like i Did not breathe good . I called the doctor and said I had to come. There I was told that I have a panic attack, I started to laugh . No way in hell !
He told me too see my doctor and Ask for therapy . And so i did .

A picture my boyfriend took of me years ago . I love it , pure happiness 🖤

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anxiety or not? What many think about when it comes to anxiety is that this is a mental problem. It is ,but it can also cause many physical problems.

Many symptoms you get when having anxiety are very similar to many diseases and you often need to go to your doctor to doublecheck. I cannot even count on 2 hands how many times I have been at the doctor to check if this is anxiety or anything else .. and this time I'll have to do it again ! I thought i had been through every symptom in the book tho but i guess not ...

I waked up today and immediately when I'll lift my head, it's like I'm on high seas. I go pee and wash my face like every morning but today i needed help to keep my balance , everything is swaying! am I dehydrated? low blood sugar maybe? or is it anxiety? but mentally I feel good or do I? I do not always know it . but this should not bother me too long! I have now been in bed all day (again) .. have been served food and i drink water as often as I can. but it is very tiring! I hope this is anything but anxiety, maybe I have something missing that the doc can fix? I'll check it up anyway . But usally i get the answer that this is anxiety and yes anxiety can be very strong and feel like hell . So no , this is not just a mental problem . I would not Google everything anxiety can make if you have a anxiety disorder but for those who dont have it it could be helpful if you need more understanding ✨

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# 1 im normally a person who dont share how i feel . I think im more open on social media than too my friends .

# 2 Ive had ptsd since i was a young child . I also had anxiety as a young child but i dont remember that very well but i got anxiety back at age 21 .

# 3 i have lived in 2 fostercare homes and one youth home . I didnt like to live in a fostercare home cause i didnt felt like i was a part of the family so i choosed to live in a youth home instead and liked that better .

# 4 When im more healthy and my case is done i would like to work with kids who have been abused cause i feel like i can understand and help others who have been through the same like me.

# 5 when i was a child i loved cows 🐮 when i lived at my dad and everything was very bad at home i would go and talk with the cows on the field , i still calm down being around them . Haha

# 6 my favourite thing to wear is pajamas . I probably have 20 of them and wear it every night ( even in the summer at 25 degrees ) lol

# 7 the best "tool" i have against anxiety is music and fishing . Nothing that calms me more down ! Other than the cows tho 🤙🏼

# 8 when someone tell me how much followers i have on Instagram i just get scared . I pretend to not know how much it is . Nobody is reading what i write lol .

# 9 i can't fall asleep without a movie on . I need sound around me . Sometimes i dont even watch it and turn around but i need the sound .

# 10 i love you all for being here .

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Its now littlebit over 2 months since i had my last panic attack and i still have this hangover feeling. I had my panic attack in the car so every time im in the car now i get anxious and very dizzy . Ive also lost so much weight after so i really need to remember myself to eat breakfast , lunch , dinner .. its like i dont get very hungry ! Trying to have a snack in between just to have some extra. But you all know how i have been struggling to keep my weight up and now its even more hard. After staying in bed the last two days i got up today , cleaned the appartment and have been outside for a trip . Short one but did it 💪🏼✨
I hope i can get back on track where i was before the panic attack . Hopefully Soon !

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Hi !
So this is very new for me but since i started anxiety_inspiration on Instagram i wanted to also have a blog so i can write more and not just share pictures . And since so much of you ask me i will give it a try and we will see how it goes !

My name is Lise, I'll be 25 years in December. I started a Instagram account for around 3 years ago when i found out that I had a anxiety/ panic disorder . I did not know much about what this was but Ive had ptsd since I was very young so I understood a bit of it. The reason for this is probably many , but one of them is that I was abused from I was 3-4 years until I was 11. I have grown up partly with my family, which I no longer have contact with, but also in foster care homes. My life has been one big mess and a lot of terrible things have happened but it turned for the better a few years ago when I started distance myself from all the people that had hurt me and didnt wanted what was best for me .Now I try to get back my life, get justice and start over again. Here I share my experiences with anxiety and ptsd! My ups and downs, tips and tricks and everything that suits me. Thank you all for following me on this journey .. and btw , english is not my first language !
Feel free to add me on Snapchat ( lisee-anett ) 👻
And anxiety_inspiration on Instagram

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