I have been living at my home now for about 1 month. The initial feelings I had the first night at sleeping in this house was feeling nervous, yet excited. I had a new home, a new person to live with (my boyfriend) and the whole place to ourselves. We knew that we could design it however we liked, we knew that we could make food for ourselves -- whenever we wanted. But the best feeling of all that I felt was that, and to no surprise, I was finally free. I was free from a home that I had been feeling so lonely in, a home that I did not feel comfortable being in. I left all the depression in my parents house and started a new life in this house, with Alex.
Do not get me wrong, I love my parents and they had been nothing but good to me, but the depression and anxiety I built up in that house made me hate living there. I felt like I was trapped in my own home. So when I got the chance to live with Alex and renovate our soon-to-be home, I jumped at the chance. I had never held a hammer before, so when I got assignments, like building walls and carrying many heavy things. I was out of my comfort zone. But I was determined that I wanted to have a place where me and Alex could call home together. And now we have. We have a lot more things to do, like bathroom and kitchen, but we are on our way.
We have done so much and I am so proud of both of us that we have actually renovated our house with our own hands -- together with Roger and Yvonne but still. This is a place where I am proud to call home. I am free of depression and the other feeling I left at my old home. This place is a new start and the place that I can make my own choices, without feeling like I am disappointing someone.
I simply love it here, I love being with my favorite person everyday and wake up next to him everyday.