My worst Interview ever was in September 2013, can’t remember the exact date but it was an oil and gas indigenous company.It was my first complete disaster🙈🙈.

I couldn’t even remember when I had applied for the company, I was fresh out of grad school and just sending my CV’s everywhere😒😒. I got a call and was asked to sell myself as I had applied to the company. My first thought was ‘’how can I sell myself? After mumbling a lot of jargon🤠, the interviewer was obviously not impressed, he vocally expressed it, but to my surprise, I was invited for a written interview ‘’OMG’’ 😳😳😳😳.

On that faithful day I was more prepared with my dress code than I was with the interview. You know Nigerian tests na, people must plenty😒. The written test was not so hard, although very technical, so I wasn’t surprised I was invited for the face to face interview. In AY’s voice ‘’Na dia the real reggae dey’’😆.

Firstly, I did not research further on the position I was applying for, In fact I didn’t even know what the position was, for all I cared, it was a graduate position. The ‘’d’’ day came and as usual my outfit was on point. The interview was meant to start by 9am but it started by 4pm. I was already stretched thin and looking at me, you could tell I was really hungry and tired 😔😔.My eyeballs were already out from its sockets literally 🤤🤤.. The room was filled with master’s students; ah intimidation was the order of the day. Everyone was talking about school, where they had worked or the interviews they had attended. I complained mildly that we should be offered tea or biscuits after being kept for so long, I mean oil and gas company that cannot do tea break is that one company at all? 🤔

When the interview started, every one going in came out with very red not smiling faces, I could tell it was tough. When it got to my turn, I could feel my heart in my head. It was definitely a good cop-bad cop interview situation and asides the technical questions being asked; they were asking some software crazy questions. Thoughts running through my mind was, is it in Nigerian school am supposed to learn those softwares? 😒😒

At the end of the day, I was not offered a position but I learnt quite a lot.

Know what the position is all about.

If you are asked how long you would like to work for the company, if possible say till your death bed, never say the truth.

Thou shalt not over dress, just dress comfortably, these days I roll up my sleeves, wear a pair of smart looking trousers and just jump in, what really matters is to know your stuff.🤓

Yes, It's okay not to answer all the questions right, but answer to the best of your ability and take a chill pill.

Don't stress it, take your time, relax and breathe. As nervous as you are, your interviewer is probably more nervous.😘

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Fishing a sport or an act of leisure? I watched a comedy show where fishing was defined as a man’s sport because a man has the capacity to sit and think of nothing, I totally concur 🙄🙄.

My fishing adventure was Inspired by an Asian American father and son. I mean if they could catch three fishes 👏👏 in a swipe, it cannot be that hard? 🤔 I forgot to put into consideration the amount of time they must have been there before I stumbled on them😅.Anyway with all that inspiration, I got fired up.

Fishing Equipment ✅

Bait ✅

Venue ✅

Chill time refreshment ✅

Off we went on our fishing adventure, very hopeful and positive. We got there and it took us a good One hour to fix our fishing pole😅.We were completely struggling with it. We spotted a black American who was gazing out on the waterfront and started asking each other what the guy was up to (tatafos @ work)🙄🙄. Imagine going to fish and not knowing how to! Plus not being able to mind your biniee 😒😒🙄

After a good One hour 30 minutes of perusing through YouTube and Google, with no traction in sight, our black American decided it was time to help the ‘’bonzos’’ 😐. He walked up to us and asked us if we needed help 😳😒😏. Like seriously😏,you mean you watched us for one hour 30 minutes and just figured that out😱.. So after helping us fix our fishing pole, we set our bait and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited 😢😥😭😓but caught nothing. We moved to a calmer side of the water, just in case the winds were chasing the fish away 😕and cast our line once again, but still nothing😕.

Whew!! Big ups to fishermen, their work is definitely not easy. Now am going to eat fish with more respek! At least I got to see presidential choppers, wondered which one Donald trump was in 🤔.

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I have always said that the problem with African women, are the elderly African women. We are taught from time immemorial to be like our fore mothers🙄, conform like our fore mothers and behave like our fore mothers, follow tradition 🤕! like seriously who tradition help? Time and chance has happened to us all. Being an African woman is not easy and I don't know about any other African country but being a Nigerian woman is tough. It's like being born and given a detailed tablet on everything that we are suppose to be. .

But I am very wrong, the problem with African women is actually our fellow African woman, old and young we are all guilty of this!. We Judge each other and criticize each other that we forget that at one point in our life we may be in the same boat🙄. I think it's all about orientation or something am not sure. I would not exclude myself because at some point in my life, I too have been biased and committed this woman shaming act🙈.

We criticize each other so much when we should actually be standing together and fighting for each other. A couple of months back my best friend got married to this wonderful lady. We were so close we would hang out all the time, sometimes even late into the night. But when he met this lady, things changed, we were not as close as we used to at the initial point but I had to understand that, I wasn't happy, but this is his life, his woman, and I have to respect her decision and his as well. It's not about me, she wasn't taking my best friend away from me, she was now his priority and as a woman, I had to understand that and support her, if I wanted to be a part of their life. There were times when woman shaming would occur but I would always stand against it. why because I love my best friend, I am a woman and If you love someone, you have to love all their extensions or at least try no matter how hard it is😊.

I have never truly understood why women would shame other women, because they are single 🙄, they have no kids, because they are marrying your brother, your son, because they are fat or skinny, they don't dress well or can't cook! their sexual orientation, their profession, how is that your business? It sounds so strange, archaic and absolutely ridiculous.

At some point in my life, I had the opportunity of working with some British women, they would ask me ridiculous things. But I think that's where I learnt to have an open mind, respect and support someone's decision. My cousin said he wanted to marry a Ghanaian, I remember asking him ''seriously, what is your mum saying about this! he told me she's absolutely cool 😳, mehn I did not believe ( Am I sure she's related by blood with my mum..my wild thoughts), so I asked her myself and she said, ''well she has met the girl, she looks and sounds responsible, it's up to him she's going to support him and accept her, she even invited her for dinner! You should have seen me during dinner I was giggling on the inside, I couldn't wait to call my mum and tell her what I just experienced. It was not about her cooking skills, or her tribe, or her mothering skills, or her sexuality or whatever skills women (mothers and sisters) cook up this days for their sons or brothers intended, it was simply about ''his decision'' you cannot try this in my house, hello mother! she would flip on your ass 😂🤣!

I always tell people that what goes around comes around. My mother would say that when you point a finger at someone remember that four others are pointed right back at you. So if you're going to woman shame, remember that one day, one day, you would be woman shamed as well and who ever your woman shaming, there is that possibility that they won't forget😒.

I have been woman shamed so many times! and 90% of the time its by my fellow woman! if you hear half the shit I have heard, your jaw would drop. In as much as I block out all the negative speech and accept the positive, it doesn't hurt any less. Let's all stop woman shaming..common ladies, we are better than this!😚✌🏼

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My father has a weird way of keeping in touch. He has his regular routine greeting over the phone. ‘’how are you? ‘’Are you okay? Normal routine check-up. But on this day it was different. I think he sounded erratic, I could sense panic in his voice as he rasped ‘’There is going to be War in this country’’. Let me introduce you to my Father. I doubt he ever got over the War of 1967. He would always argue about how he lost classes, how he ate lizard out of extreme hunger, how he fought at the War front during the War, which my mother would always counter in her high pitched voice as a lie. She never believed he fought during the war!

My father never got over the War, his famous words are ‘’ We are not one’’.

The news everywhere is the northerners (Arewa youths) have given the Igbo’s till October First, 2017 to leave the North, and also given the northerners till October 1st, 2017 to leave the East. What is it with the Northerners and the Easterners like seriously?

Biafra is like piled up resentment and rage that has grown into full blown furry! Let my people go! Just like the Egyptians refused to let the Israelites go, Nigeria has refused from time immemorial to let Biafran’s go. But should we really be surprised? I have read a lot of books about Biafra ‘’half of a yellow sun by Chimamander Adiche’’ and ‘’There was a country by Chinua Achebe’’. From the bitter discussions I hear from my parents about Biafra and my little knowledge from reading, I can tell you that War is not a sweet affair, that 1967 was not necessary, the blood shed on mother earth was not necessary and the time lost which we can never get back was not necessary. That there was greed, selfishness and Ego on both sides and this corrupted our minds. That the west was not affected in 1967 does not mean that it would not be affected now! That you feel you would not be affected because you are cocooned in luxury and you are not Igbo but forget that you have a friend/ a relative who is Igbo.

I do not blame the Biafran’s, after all they are industrious, highly intelligent, well Educated and want what is just-fully theirs. A mother cannot show favouritism to one of her children alone, the other children would definitely grow with resentment.

To think that after 1967 nothing was done to amend the constitution to make Nigeria an equal opportunity country for us all. I mean they fought for something right? So why weren’t their needs and wants looked into and granted, instead it was led to fester and become a disease in their mind, hearts prompting them once again to chant the ''song of biafra’’!

My Question truly is, Is Biafra ready? Or are we like the Israelites who wanted to be let go but had no plan. Are we truly one? Our fore fathers were ready then, and they were One. They fought side by side. But are we really ONE now? Are we truly ready to be let go? Who are the Biafran’s? And do they want to be Let go? Let us not hastily compare ourselves to Brexit because we are not as organized or as United as they are. We need to really think!

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A lot of people asked me, Why did you leave? it always felt funny😒, how does one start explaining. Sometimes I would just say oh! it was a Raggedy assed experience, other times I just smile and say nothing. I have wondered how I would write this story and came up with thousands and thousands of headings, but it has never felt right. But yea, this is my memoir🤓🗒🖋.

I resigned from a company a couple of months ago and that was the best decision I made. I was free💃. A friend of mine joked 'working is overrated' when I told her I had resigned,I laughed! she did not know the half of it!

I remember my first days at work in a haze, my first impression of my colleagues was that they looked like puppets, lacking excitement🤦🏼♂️🤦🏼♀️, they did not have funk! but what the heck! I came to deliver and deliver I banked on.

The first few months were busy great months, I was excited, I mean I wanted to do and give my best that's always who I have been. Willing to go the extra mile, go beyond, the perfectionist. Learning,assimilating, understanding, I am one of those women who loves learning new things, I feel great when I can look back and say Yes! I did this/ we made this happen. So first few months were great, great teamwork. But then it started to dawn on me...this was heavy weight half Scam🙀🙀🙀! lol.

Firstly, all the training that was supposed to be learnt, did not happen🙃🙃. At some point it kept being procrastinated to a point I knew deep down that it would never happen, it was one of those YO-YO jokes you toss at a child. I personally did not feel very bad about it, because the current state of Nigeria and the industry was crazy. But I felt that if something is not going to work out, instead of making more promises you cannot fulfill cut the crap and just explain😒, it’s always that easy🤷🏼♀️.

Secondly there was this drastic incidence were we were harassed by military individuals. I was practically scared for my life (Like what if I had been raped)right on company premises 🙆🏻🙆🏼♂️ and all for what really? The shocking part of it all was I watched the HR being harassed, Insulted and humiliated. There was no way we could actually take a picture or record it down because the minute we stepped into the office our phones were seized😢.So I stood there and watched the HR tear up so badly, and could not do anything about it. Another colleague was told to sit on the floor🙆🏻, amazing.com. When the whole ordeal was over I picked my bags and went straight home. The saddest part about it was, no apology was sent round to employees for putting our life’s in danger😢( I mean it was the fault of management and they saw this coming, why weren't we given a heads up?). Instead puppet master as a reward to his ''loyal staffs for cleaning up office mess and items thrown out of the premises'' bought them gifts items (like if one of them had been raped the gift would cover up for it🙄).I was flabbergasted and I knew then that my days in that company was numbered!




During all that period I was working on a project and pulling a few strings with the help of old friends, like I said, I love to look back and tell myself Yes! we did this, so before I was ready to share to my team members I wanted to get to a certain point. At this time Puppet Master recruited Papa Bear!Apparently Papa bear was meant to be my mentor/monitor I never quite figured out what exactly🤷🏼♀️. (I would have preferred structured training but its all good) I felt it must have been a personal joke! but then I believe you can always learn something even from a three year old right? That's how the house of cards started falling down.

The first round table meeting I had with Papa Bear, he went on and on about my nice earrings, beautiful face, young girl, do I love ''Manolo booths🙁😕!''?? and how Nigerian men are a softie to women like me so therefore I would definitely bring in contracts😦😦😳. I was dumb founded I definitely was not expecting that. This frustrated looking man who did not know jack about the industry was giving me dead lines, the funny thing was the ''head Puppet'' and the 'Puppet Master' were at the meeting as well and they all kept mute (so saying they were in on it!). When I complained to my friends they would all laugh and give me that story of ''welcome to Nigeria. there are no jobs''! I just kept counting down quietly and decided this was not where I wanted to develop my career!

Fast forward to an incidence Papa Bear told me he would walk me out of the door 😳during a meeting, screamed how he was going to sack me, walk me out the door, how the industry was down at the moment and there were no jobs for graduates. 🤣🤣Wawuu!!!

Things kept going from crazy to worse and there were days I would leave my house early and just go to church 🙏 and just sit down, because the zeal to go to work was not there anymore. I did not see why I should continue pushing the project I was working on because I was being side lined in meetings on purpose, the excuse they would come up with is ''its technical'' and I would ask myself technical what am I? I was not getting the fulfillment I wanted at work and when I asked for a leave of absence, it felt like I was asking for ''too much'' like it was not my right! I was tired, exhausted, irritated, some days I would want to come to work and give papa Bear the middle 🤦🏼♀️finger. He would smoke, curse and use swearwords all the time in the office!. The funny thing was Puppet Master loved loyalty, he loves it when you can give him gossip! 🤦🏼♂️and that’s what they were feeding him fake bullshit gossip he was swallowing and taking it as loyalty, never met anyone who loved gossip 🙀 like he did. I remember a colleague telling me once that 'I need to understand puppet master and follow him, don’t question, don’t act like you don’t understand, just agree and not do anything about it'' what a crazy advice!

I struggled within me and almost started to loose my self confidence 😢. I would question myself, if my decisions were the right ones and even ask my colleagues for feedback ''were was I going wrong''? I began to loose myself bit by bit.

I was used to working in a fast paced environment were ones opinion mattered irrespective of age, gender or status as long as you were polite about it. If for anything, I was the one everyone would like to work with because I always knew my stuff and was always eager to learn. So I was very amazed at this new turn of events.

At some point, I called a personal mentor of mine and explained everything to him, he told me that ''I was a woman, I was an Intelligent woman and a bit too courageous and maybe ambitious and most African men are yet to accept such women''. ''It did not matter if I had a degree or I was smart. I was just a beautiful woman to them and this was Nigeria anything goes! and that was the problem''.



I was ready to GO🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️! My mum held me back! be patient, keep silent! I was dead done! Months before I resigned, I already drafted my resignation letter and waited. Waited for the right time, and when it came I seized it with a bang and it was named ''pull a Pamela''.

At the end of the day why am I writing this? is it to motivate the next person?🕴🏼. A lot of people are going through this in their jobs, the fear of lack of jobs and the next meal ticket makes them stay put! maybe you would not take my approach but I personally looked at three things before I made my decision.

Was I being invested in? I was not 👩🏻💼

Did I have peace of mind? I did not, I was constantly reminded by Papa bear how people on the streets of lagos were hungry for jobs and by Puppet Master how he would put some constrains, some of those messages I saved, munched and words I recorded.

I was not being mentored, nor empowered, nor TRUSTED, nor valued, nor appreciated, nor challenged and I definitely did not feel mentored. I was working with a bunch of men who had no value for women. I would not want to go towards the tribalistic approach but on a lot of occasions, I wondered if that was the case and if it was should it be?

There was no structured system? who was I to report to, Puppet Master, Papa bear and Head Puppet were in on it. I understand that the situation in Nigeria is so crazy, there are no jobs, and for as little as anything/experience graduates would leap at a job offer, so my rage was not with them, my rage was with the Industry 😶 and government 😠 for not going back to the drawing board, changing policies and putting structures in place to protect the youths, for not understanding that the work force of yesterday was different from today!

There is nothing more valuable than peace of mind or working in an organisation where you are valued and motivated. 👌🙏👊🏽

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Music is like magic to our souls ❤❤. From 'Leave it like 👌that on the streets of Newcastle to 'Better than you'👌Lolli X keeps bringing it on! 👏👏

Subscribe and comment because no one is better than you!...👉👉👉@https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-djh-LGICCM&feature=youtu.be

Let's sit back and enjoy this new jam! 🤛👊🏽

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Anyone who knows me can tell am a sucker for movies🙄🙄. I am that kinda girl that would come out of a movie theater and cant wait to gist about the movie🤗🤗, in fact I may even sleep off and dream about being the heroine of the movie🏃🏾♀️👊🏽 ( I cant explain how this has happened on countless occasions🤦🏼♀️). Anyway, this past two weeks have been movie hulola for me.😁

I could not wait to watch Logan, the theater was full beyond doubt, everyone kept laughing or whistling about one special move or another 🙄( I did not get this as I did not find anything amusing or funny🤷🏼♀️). What a movie tho! 👌Is it truly the end of the professor and Logan😿. When I was a kid, I fell in-love with wolverine😍😘, he was my best character in X-men. to think that the old mutants are gone, and the dawn of a new bio-generated mutants are here🙋😎, wawuu! What happened to the old mutants, how did they die? the last I watched was Apocalypse!! I see a new conspiracy theory coming up🤔. I sincerely wonder what the new story spin would be. I did not get the usual shivers I get when watching X-men but all in all, on a scale of 10-0, may give it a 6. .mehn who would have thought wolverine had a daughter and what a weapon of mass destruction she 👏👏is...Fast forward to that little chubby boy running 🙈(Ok that was funny😀!)

OK when I think of Kong, I just want to jump out savage like and beat my chest wildly 😺😺bang-bang..bang-bang-bang-bang- bang and then ROAR at all the people trying to challenge my panda peace🙏 (💭💭 am going to practice that).

I cant help but remember that creepy crazy old battalion soldier mans voice when he said 'You don’t go into someone’s 🏡 and start dropping bombs 💣unless you trying to pick a fight🙃'! Kong's god around here, but the devil leaves below us!...Wawuu to skin shiver statements.🤡🤡🤡

Tale as old as time (how so true those words are🙄🙄🙄), beauty and the beast. The major story right here is that there is something deeper than what the eye can see. Oh well lets not forget we have a 'trans 🙄' in 2017 beauty and the beast. All that music made me almost go crazy😒😒, but all that romance, oh lord lord😍, took a lot not to shed a tear😀.

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We all have weird friends, don’t we? Some guys turned best friends that the thought of dating them means you want to cross over to the LGBT society 🤦🏼♀️ and nah nah nah (not my forte). But am not talking about those friends, am talking about ‘’the girl friends 😍’’. Every girl has that friend who is ‘a good girl 🙏-she don’t club, she doesn’t drink, she prays 24/7, she got no BF or male friends 💆🏼, she’s waiting on the lord for that super human perfect man😒’ or ‘the coded one’- I cannot even define this one! She is the baddest of all ✋🏻she is the real definition of sheep in wolves clothing 👁👀(GO FIGURE), we have the crazy friend🙋💃damn she’s always turning up💃.The talkative 🤦🏼♂️🤦🏼♀️-that friend who don’t care about nothing, she’s going to give you the type of gist that would make your ears 🙋🙆🏻ringgg!!!, then we have the smart ones👩🏼🎓, the responsible friend👰🏽, who will always have one or two advice for you 👩🏼🏫, the alcoholic 🍷she’s not crazy, she just has an affinity for booze and lastly the curious one👩🏽💻-who believes she has nine lives and therefore has to try everything new👱🏻♀️!

Today I am celebrating the responsible one😁. When this love story started, I don’t know where I was, all I know Is I heard 👂, I was excited and as always 😍, I joined in the happily ever after👰🏽.

Because they love to laugh......❤❤❤ stay around this guys....damn..someone is always teasing the other.

Trust us 🤞🏿, we must always come out 👏👏SLAYING!!!

Double tap if you spot the three musketeers 👊🏽✌🏼....From QC TO UNIPORT...we always have each others back.

Family that SLAYS together...🙌🙌🙌..the look on the bride's mum's face tho..epic..peaceful, joyful, fulfilled.

The twerk master..😉☺️i tried to learn but failed......fast forward to next picture..is that my backside😂😂 (wowzers)

Lights...camera...Action..Blush!!!

I raise my glass 🍷as I say a big cheers to our responsible one with all my heart❤,I cannot wait to see little responsible girls-honey get with 😘😘it am counting down already!! Cheers because just as you found the man of your dreams, he found the woman of his dreams.

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When music makes you happy 🙋😀, you cant help but SING! 🎼🎶🎤🎸🎻🎺from gospel music at ATC club in ANSU Nigeria, to R & B on the streets of Newcastle ✨Lolli x the lover of love 💕💓has come to romance us with his music 💫



2017 got everyone screaming SLAY year💪🏽👊🏽!!! Lolli X decided to SLaY with us 👏👏by romancing us with a new and amazing solo R & B😊😉

Let's all support Lolli x the new and latest upcoming artist 👏👏 Like, Subscribe , comment and let's leave it like that ✌🏿️❤️✨@https://youtu.be/6HxYhDmVNiA

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Igwe tupac got nothing on us. We came to slay in 2017 and we aint kidding about it, that’s why we screaming 😀😀 at the top of our voices 🙌🙋👏 AMOSHINE!!

If you did not shine with us last year then there’s time for you to do so this year, don’t let 2017 pass you by without joining the Ivette naturals family 😁😁.

Ever since I started using Ivette naturals body butters and bar soap am like 👏👏😘 *snaps fingers three times screaming* I gat luscious skin! 💋💋 in fact the speed and ease at which I rub it morning and night…sister gurlllll you can testify from just watching me step.🎊💅🏾

Hold up! Don’t just stand there admiring! Shine with me, cos this year I want us to SLAY together!!! 💋👄

The wonderful thing about Ivette naturals is that we have a wide range of products from turmeric body butter which I use, to Shea butter, cocoa butter and beeswax, not forgetting our soap bars which span from Turmeric, Charcoal, Moringa and anti-ageing soap (If your mama loves shakara like mine 👀👀, then call us up baby 😉😉)

Ivette naturals is ready to customize their products to suite your skin ailment, just because they love you, the valentine season is fast approaching, shine and catch Mr right! 😉

Follow blog link @ivettenaturals

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Or contact :08029474842 & 08167320923 for your orders!!



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